


Enemy of my Enemy...

by HarleyQuinn1317



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Canon Compliant, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Fix-It, Fluff and Angst, Force Bond (Star Wars), Glove Kink, Kylo Ren Redemption, Mutual Masturbation, Mutual Pining, POV Kylo Ren, POV Rey (Star Wars), Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Post-Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, Pre-Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, Protective Kylo Ren, Rey & Rose Tico Are Best Friends, Slow Burn Rey/Kylo Ren, Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Spoilers, Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Trailer, Virgin Kylo Ren, Virginity
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-11
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-01-27 08:13:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 77,844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21388948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HarleyQuinn1317/pseuds/HarleyQuinn1317
Summary: After the battle of Crait, Kylo Ren and Rey must now decide if they will continue to fight against each other or explore the Force Bond that continues to thrust them into each others' lives.  When a greater evil rises, will they be able to put aside their differences and their feelings to save the galaxy? Or will finally coming together be their undoing?
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Rose Tico, Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey & Ben Solo, Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 127
Kudos: 307





	1. The Force Bond

**Author's Note:**

> Post TLJ - exploring the Force Bond and a slow burn romance between Kylo Ren and Rey of Jakku.

Crait:

The First Order trooped through the blasted opening in the old Resistance base, with Kylo Ren in the lead. There was a room off to the left, an old communications room, and he could feel the remnants of the force calling to him, giving him pause. As the storm troopers secured the perimeter, Kylo entered the room. There was no mistaking it, the room sang with his mother’s force signature. She had been here only moments ago. There was something small on the floor, and he bent to retrieve it. His heart lurched in his chest as he scooped up the set of golden dice that belonged to Han Solo. 

And in that moment the room fell silent, the familiar deafening surrounding him right before the force bond opens. He _ felt _ rather than heard a whoosh of air, bringing his gaze up - brown eyes clashing with hazel as he stared at Rey. She was ushering in the last of the Resistance fighters onto the damn Falcon. She froze, and he could sense the sadness within her, now coursing through _ his _ veins. But she quenched it almost as quickly as it came, replacing it with pity….pity for the broken monster on his knees before her. And then she hit the button to close the doors, causing him to slightly jump, as she resolved to never feel for him again. She was not only closing the door on him but on the bond they shared. As it whirred shut, the golden dice slowly faded away and he clenched his gloved hand in fury. _ He will destroy her _…

One Year Later:

Kylo hiked up the dune, his large frame making it impossible not to sink into the hot sand with each step he took. Luckily he was a fit man, and as long as he kept his pace steady, he experienced very little difficulty. He paused once he reached the top, gazing out at the vast desert before him. _ This place really is a shithole _, he thought to himself. He reached for his canteen, pulling the rag protecting his face down to take a swig of the cool liquid. He swished it around his mouth before spitting it out, effectively cleaning the dust clinging to his teeth. Even with the protective gear, the sand and dust seemed to invade every part of his body. The quicker he finished his mission, the better.

Thankfully he had forgone the usual black tunic and snug pants in exchange for a white shirt and grey trousers for this particular mission. It was best he remained incognito. There was no way to explain why the Supreme Leader of the First Order was traipsing around the deserts of Jakku….no reason he wanted to give, anyway. He had left his TIE Silencer on a nearby planet loyal to the First Order and rented a ship that would make the short trip here to this desolate junk pile of a planet. 

He left Hux in charge on the Finalizer; the ginger happy he wouldn’t have to accompany him on this particular trip. They had both spent the last year operating under an uneasy truce: Hux would stop trying to overthrow him and he’d stop force choking him in front of their subordinates. It was working out quite well. Once they realized Snoke treated them _ both _ like dogs, it gave them something to bond over. No, not bond ...poor choice of words. It gave them _ common ground _. It didn’t take long for Kylo to realize Hux responded well to praise -- an ego boost for the sniveling general went a long way. Hux got to rule over the Finalizer: tracking the Resistance, running small raids with his storm troopers for a planet’s minerals, and being an all around pompous ass. Meanwhile, Kylo was free to run his small missions off ship without having to worry Hux might slit his throat in his sleep. No, it was best they were on the same side ...at least for now.

Kylo took out his binoculars, and looked around the desert. If that idiot Plutt was to be believed, what he sought wasn’t far now. There! He spotted his prize. It was well hidden...having endured a year’s worth of sand storms, it was partially buried. But he was certain this was what he came for. He closed his eyes, taking a deep, cleansing breath before releasing it. His shields were firmly in place in his mind. He shifted, dropping them for only a moment, letting the Force slip slowly into his mind like creeping tendrils of smoke. And he could feel _ it _almost instantly, slamming so hard against him that he stumbled back. 

_ Her _… 

Bringing his shields back into place, he quickly made his way down the hill.

He stood in front of the old model AT-AT...a junker from the old Empire. With a flick of his wrist, he removed the sand, clearing a path inside. He took a deep, measured breath, slowly releasing it. Then he entered the ramshackle machine _ she _ had once called home.

******

Rey had shut the Falcon door, systematically cutting him off from her mind and closing their bond. 

_ Or so she thought _… 

It didn’t take long before the Force reopened old wounds, bringing him to her at the most inopportune times and vice versa. She would ignore him until it faded and he had learned to do the same. But the Force seemed to have a sense of humor. The more they ignored it, the more frequent they were thrust into each other’s lives. And the power was growing, changing. Sometimes she could see where he was, interact with his surroundings. And he could see the people she was with…...though the Force was careful not to give him too many clues to her actual location. 

Both of them were growing weary of this connection. _ He a little more than she _, he thought.

The final straw was mere weeks after the battle on Crait. He stepped out of his refresher after a long day of training. There she was, suddenly standing in his path, his naked body crashing into her. They fell together, arms and legs intertwining onto the floor of his bedchambers. She became very aware of his body, struggling to free herself from him. 

“Fuck, Rey, stop wiggling!” he gritted through clenched teeth. 

He hated her ...wanted to kill her...but he was still a man. And his body betrayed him instantly; his member growing hard as a rock at her inadvertent menstrations. As her buttocks grazed against his shaft, he let slip a groan and it halted her movements. They both just lay there for the space of a heartbeat, wrapped in each other’s embrace.

“You need to release me…” she ground out.

He didn’t hesitate, pulling himself free of her. They both scrambled to their feet, putting as much distance between them as they could muster in the tight quarters. She turned to face him, ready to scold him, no doubt, when her eyes raked over his naked body. The words died in her throat and she looked away, hiding her face, but not before he saw her cheeks pinkening with a maiden’s blush.

_ Good _… he thought. He may hate her but there was still a sort of manly satisfaction in how she innocently responded to his nakedness. Rolling his eyes, he wrapped a towel around his waist. “Feel free to leave any time,” he replied, his words laced with something….anger?...hurt?...He didn’t have any desire to try to discern it at the moment. He was tired and damn her to hell, he was going to have to find his own release if he had any hope of sleeping this evening, his shaft straining for relief. He walked to his closet, pulling out a pair of black sleep pants. 

“I would if I could but I can’t,” she turned to chide him. He immediately dropped his towel, sliding into his sleep pants one long leg at a time. He could feel her embarrassment as she averted her eyes. It almost brought a smile to his lips. _ Almost _…

He pushed past her. “Suit yourself.” He crawled onto his bed, pulling the silk black sheets back. He settled in before reaching above his head to turn off the lights, plunging the room into darkness. He lay there in the dark, one arm propped behind his head, one knee bent to provide relief of the pressure of his erection. She was so quiet that he would think she finally faded away save he could hear ...no, _ feel _ her presence still there in his room. He closed his eyes, mentally running over the daily figures Hux was boring him with before he decided to hide in the training room. It was working. He could feel himself slipping into a meditative state when there was movement against his bed. She had come to sit on the edge of the mattress, close to his feet. He jumped up into a sitting position, pulling his knees to his chest to avoid touching her. 

“Ben. Ben, this has to stop.” 

“Are you implying I am controlling this?” he bit out. She wasn’t serious, was she?

“Snoke is dead. The bond should have died with him. You said so yourself, the effort to maintain this would kill me so...it’s you. It has to be _ you _. Please Ben…”

The fury uncoiled in his chest, spreading into his limbs before creeping into his mind. Suddenly he was on his feet, his lightsaber pulling into his hand from across the room. He ignited it, bringing it close to her face. The red glow illuminated her features. He expected fear...hell, he craved it from her. But he was met with only sadness, the saber making the tear streaks on her face glisten like rubies. He shut it off, letting the saber fall to the floor with a loud clatter. He cared naught. 

He ran his palms over his face, turning away from her. What if she was right? Was _ he _doing this? Or was it something beyond their control? He truly didn’t know. He had tried researching it back when it first began but there was nothing in the Sith texts or Jedi lore even close to what they were sharing. No, this was something new and it would take time to unravel it. 

_ Yes _...right here and now he resolved to seek out the answers behind this and kill it once and for all. And then he could finally be rid of her….

“Ben…” her voice was small but he could feel her behind him, her emotions uncertain. She feathered a touch across his shoulder; his traitorous skin sung from the feeling of the contact. He pushed it down deep into his chest, quieting it.

He whirled on her, “Stop calling me that. I am Supreme Leader Kylo Ren and you will address me as such.”

She recoiled from him as if he struck her. He advanced on her, “You weak little scavenger. You come here accusing me of fabricating this ridiculous, torturous mind-fuck that we share. As if given the choice I would waste my time on a nobody like you. Your own parents didn’t even want you. No one wants you...least of all me.” 

He spit the words at her like venom. And he wasn’t finished. He stalked towards her, forcing her to back away until she collided with the wall. He slammed his palms against the wall, one on each side of her face, pinning her in his embrace. He leaned in so they were but a breath apart.

“I’m coming for you, Rey. I will be stronger… faster… and this time, you won’t win.” She met his gaze dead on, rage and fury filling her eyes, her mind...seeping into him. “Ah, there it is...the look from the forest. Good. Hate me, Rey. I want you to _ hate me _.”

But his eyes flicked to her lips then, her tongue inadvertently teasing him as she moistened the pink flesh. Suddenly his breathing grew shallow and rapid, his heart beating in his ears, deafening him. He found himself leaning closer to her, his head bending to meet that delectable mouth. But he was met with only air as she faded away.

He groaned, a slew of curses tumbling from his mouth. She made him weak when he needed to be strong. Enough was enough. He would end the bond; end her.. Whether it truly was Snoke’s doing or a greater Force at work, it would end. And he would see to it.

And so began his year of chasing leads, researching ancient texts, honing his Force and saber skills; all the while meditating with the greatest masters he could find to block Rey from his mind. Occasionally she’d still slip through but he easily pushed her out, severing the connection. She may be strong but she was still untrained; giving him an edge over her within the Force. He would never be weak for her again. Ben Solo was dead. Supreme Leader Kylo Ren was alive and well, and the strongest he had ever been.

*****

Kylo stepped inside the AT-AT, ducking his tall frame through the small makeshift doorway. There was just the right amount of light peeking through the cracks in the rusted metal to show him the way. He removed his goggles and face coverings, squinting as his eyes adjusted. He could feel her presence all around him, even with his shields firmly in place. Her Force signature practically caked the walls. He let it draw him in, guiding him to her innermost sanctum. He removed his gloves and laid them on a small table where dried weeds had been given a loving position in a makeshift vase. He let his fingers travel over the fragile texture, watching as the leaves fell to dust on his fingertips. There was a brass bell next to the vase. He lifted it and instantly he felt the connection ...the meaning it had to her. He carefully laid it back down, not really wanting to disturb anything though he doubted she would ever return to this place. 

He clasped his hands behind his back and surveyed his surroundings with a critical eye. _ Why Rey? _ he asked himself. It was a question that had been plaguing him for the last year. She came from nothing. She was nothing...yet the Force chose her to possess its great power. Not to mention also tying her to him, the last of the Skywalker line...heir to his grandfather Darth Vader. He sighed deeply. And the Force led him here...for what? To better understand her? He scoffed. 

He walked to a little shelf where there sat a doll dressed as a Resistance pilot. He picked it up. She had made this, he realized. Something for her to not feel _ so alone _ . He could see her clear in his mind -- a little girl, scrawny and tired but spending night after night painstakingly weaving it together, longing for that one friend to call her own. He had a Resistance doll when he was just a boy. A gift from the walking rug, Chewbacca. His doll had been expensive, professionally made by the skilled crafters of Naboo. It sat among a pile of toys he rarely touched. It meant nothing to him. But _ this _...this was all she had. He felt something stir inside him then as he stared at that doll. A feeling he hadn’t felt in over a year. 

_ You have compassion for her _…. Snoke’s voice filled his mind. He closed his eyes, trying in vain to escape the images of his former master torturing him until he broke. Rage boiled over and he flung the doll against the hard metal of the wall, screaming out his pain. And as quickly as it came, it evaporated; leaving in its wake the cold, emotionless Kylo Ren. He picked the doll up and returned it to the shelf. This was turning out to be a complete waste of his time. He turned to find his gloves when something else caught his eye.

He took a few steps towards the back wall. He tentatively reached his hand towards it but hesitated. He had already come this far, he chided himself. He extended his fingers, tracing over the tick marks scratched into the surface. He closed his eyes and let the invading memory in. 

_ There he was, feeling trapped and utterly alone within the walls of the Jedi Temple. He removed a small cutting tool he had pilfered from the Falcon. He pushed aside the papers and texts on his small table, letting the ancient words of Jedi before him fall haphazardly to the floor. Slowly, he scratched another tick mark into the wooden surface. 22 days now…22 days since last he saw his parents...22 days since they abandoned him here… _

** _Ben Solo_ ** _ … _

_ Ben covered his ears. That voice again. It whispered through his mind. _

** _Ben Solo...you are not alone_ **... 

_ Ben flung himself onto his cot, covering his head with his pillow. Go away….go away...go away...he pleaded. _

  
  


Kylo opened his eyes, chasing the vision away. Snoke had preyed on his vulnerability, and worse, Kylo had let him. As powerful as the Sith Lord was, Kylo had always been more powerful, yet let his childish insecurities convince him otherwise. It was why Snoke kept him so firmly under his boot heel. This past year hadn’t just been Kylo’s way of breaking the infuriating bond with Rey but had also led him on a path of self-discovery. For the first time in his life, he was completely in control of himself and his actions. There was no voice in the back of his head, seducing him with power. No, he _ was _ the power. That realization had led to many moments of calm reflection such as this one. He can now look back on pieces of his past without letting it consume him in rage. Yes, there were still brief intervals of his old self that slipped through (he looked at the doll as a reminder) but all in all he had made much progress. He was now more sure than ever that the past needed to die. No more Sith...no more Jedi...no more Resistance and First Order ...One galaxy under one rule... _ his rule _. 

He grabbed his gloves, shoving them onto his hands. This, like so many of the paths he has followed over the past year, had proven a waste. He wasn’t sure what he was hoping to find here but it was only a rusted out shell of Rey’s past. It held no answers. He gave his surroundings a quicky cursory glance before turning to leave. He took one step and paused. He turned back around, grabbing something and shoving it into his pack. Then he made his way out.

Kylo stepped out into the blaring sun of the Jakku desert. Spending a decade on battleships in space had taken its toll on him and he hated all this light. He snorted. Of course he preferred the darkness. It was part of him now. 

He went to pull down his safety goggles when he felt _ it _. There was a ripple in the Force. The air shifted around him, giving way to a sudden silence. He hated this part ...but he hated more what came next. He looked up and their gazes locked. 

She was standing only a few feet in front of him now. She had on a version of her scavenger outfit, only this one was more pale than earthy tones, perfectly highlighting her tanned skin. He sighed inwardly, hating himself for noticing that. 

They hadn’t seen each other in almost a year and yet she looked the same but _ felt _different. 

_ Still as beautiful as ever _... his mind betrayed him. 

He swallowed past the sudden lump in his throat. She was looking at him with confusion, as if she couldn’t believe she was seeing him after all this time. He realized then it was his fault. He lost control. He let his shields down, albeit briefly, but enough for her to slip past. 

“Rey…” he started.

She immediately grabbed her blaster, firing a shot at him. He tilted his head to the left, letting the blast scream by him, punching a hole into the side of the AT-AT. He flicked his wrist and her blaster flew from her hand before she could fire off another shot. She didn’t hesitate. She fiddled for only a second before her lightsaber was in her hand. She had tried to mend it but he could see it was unstable at best. Its blue ember flared, the sparks burning her hand. 

She swung at him in rage. He easily dodged her strike. He ignited his own saber then, meeting her next thrusts with harder, faster, one-handed blows. He wouldn’t relent this time. He poured his full strength into each swing. She had no choice but to retreat from him before tripping and falling onto her back. He used the Force to pull her saber easily from her hand into his own. Then he flung it away, letting it sink into the sand. 

“You're not ready,” he stated.

He turned off his saber before returning it to his belt. Then he calmly turned from her and walked away.

*****

Kylo maneuvered his Silencer into the docking bay on the Finalizer. He grabbed his pack and then reached for his newly reformed helmet. He turned it over in his hand, gazing with reluctance at the symbol of his brutality...his cracked and wreaked soul. Seeing her today had shook him, bringing his old feelings of self-loathing to the forefront of his mind. She immediately had tried to kill him. She had failed...miserably, of course, but the fact that she had _ tried _. If ever he had a doubt about her feelings, no longer was that a concern after today. She wanted him dead. It was as simple as that.

He sighed. Then he slipped his mask on and exited his ship.

Hux was the first to greet him. “Supreme Leader,” he bent his head in respect.

“General Hux,” came his robotic neutral voice.

“There’s been a development, Ren.”

This gave Kylo pause. He met Hux’s gaze. There was unmistakable fear in the General’s eyes.


	2. An Unusual Visitor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Resistance receives an unusual visitor...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A Rey POV chapter.

_ One week later _

Rey chewed her bottom lip in concentration. She stared down at the legacy lightsaber she had worked so hard to mend. It had failed her. Or she had failed it. She had no idea which.

She had been free of Kylo Ren for almost a year. She had felt his presence only for fleeting moments but she hadn’t seen or heard from him through the bond in so long she had forgotten how intense it could be. Suddenly there he was, standing tall and formidable before her. She barely recognized him, at first. He was dressed so differently. Gone was her enemy dressed all in black, replaced by a softer version in white and gray, yet no less dangerous. A man very reminiscent of his father. This was Ben Solo.

Or how she had always pictured Ben Solo.

But Ben Solo was gone. And she quenched the irresponsible urge to run into his arms, instead opting for her blaster to distract him. He had to have opened the bond for a reason after all this time. He was finally making good on his promise - to come for her...to end her.

Her past year had been plagued with nightmares...of seeing him try to kill her in her dreams. Running her down with his TIE Silencer...his red crackling lightsaber cleaving her in two...or the more personal one with his gloved hands wrapped around her throat, squeezing the final breath from her body.

Rey shivered. She had been living in hell not knowing what he would do next. And now he was back...much stronger than she. He could have easily killed her. 

But he didn’t.

_ You’re not ready _ .

No truer words had he ever spoken to her. Her gaze returned to the lightsaber in her hands. The threat of tears pricked her eyes. How deeply shamed Luke would be of her -- the “last Jedi”. She had the ancient texts, tried to study them...to learn from the Jedi pasts but it was no use. She needed a teacher. She needed to know her path...her place in this story. For without guidance, the fear of the unknown was winning. She had been wrong about Ben Solo; it almost cost her life and the lives of her friends. She was not meant for this - the Force be damned. 

Many times over the past year, Rey considered fleeing back to Jakku...back to her uncomplicated life as a scavenger. All she had accomplished was moving a few rocks and suddenly she was the hope of the entire Resistance. It was too much pressure, especially given the lie she was living on a daily basis: that she was bonded to the most hated man in the galaxy, Kylo Ren. And, worse, she _felt_ _something_ for him... 

She had never known love...parental or otherwise. But there was something in her that stirred whenever he was near. It frightened her more than the possibility of dying by his hand. It had been there, thick and unpliable between them in the throne room after Snoke’s death. Ben….,no,  _ Kylo  _ had reached his hand out to her and the urge to take it nearly overwhelmed her. She had  _ wanted  _ to take it. Not to rule the galaxy ...and sure as hell not to join the First Order; she just wanted to be  _ his _ .

Was he right? In the end, would she be the one to turn? The thought racked her with so much guilt and self-doubt. It jeopardized her power within the Force, so no matter how hard she trained, she still couldn’t control it. Finn, Poe, even Leia wouldn’t understand and so she locked her feelings up tight within her, desperate for her fear not to show. And a part of her resented  _ them  _ for it. Would she turn to the darkside simply to have a companion who was like her -- someone who understood what she was going through? 

She felt like a complete failure. She could not turn Ben Solo and she could not turn away from Kylo Ren. Was he even now invading her mind, locating their small Resistance division because she was too susceptible to him?

She closed her eyes, clenching the legacy lightsaber in her hands. 

_ Rey _ …

His deep voice resonated in her mind.

She squeezed her eyes tightly shut, refusing to let the image of him in. Even when she felt his fingers on her cheek, his thumb tracing over her bottom lip.

He crouched before her, the heat from his body warming her inside and out. He laid his hands in her lap. “Rey, look at me.”

She could feel his will shredding the last of her defenses. Slowly she opened her eyes.

Her heart stopped in her chest as her gaze fell on him. Dressed in white and gray as before, he greeted her with a warm smile and soft brown eyes. She felt a tear slip down her cheek as she said, “Ben…”

“Yes, Rey...yes…”

She flung herself into his arms, holding him tightly against her. She buried her face against the hardness of his broad shoulders, the waves of his black hair tickling her nose. “Ben...Ben…” she murmured against him.

“You have to be strong now, Rey. Now more than ever…” he whispered against her ear.

She shook her head. “I-I can’t…”

He pulled her head away from him, holding her face in the palms of his hands, his eyes searching hers, “Yes, you can…You are stronger than you know.”

“He’s going to kill me.”

“I won’t let him.”

“Tell me how to defeat him, Ben...please.”

He chuckled, “You know that’s not how this works, Rey.”

She sighed. “I know…” She pulled away from him, withdrawing into herself.

He leaned in, resting his forehead against hers. “Everything you need to win is in here,” he whispered, pointing to where her heart lay in her chest. “And here,” he tapped the lightsaber in her hands. “Do you understand, Rey?”

She closed her eyes as a sharp pain sliced through her head, making her cringe. “I-I think so..” 

“Rey, tell me you understand.” His voice was distant. A far away whisper... 

_ Rey _ … Kylo’s deep vibrato filled her head now, making her cringe.

“Rey!” It was Leia.

Rey’s eyes flew open. She was surprised to find herself hovering above the meditation rock where she had been sitting. Suddenly the Force gave way, and she fell, the legacy lightsaber crashing to the ground, splitting in half.

Leia came rushing forward, “Rey!” Leia crouched down next to her. Rey pulled herself into a sitting position. She cringed as she examined her knee, a small gash had started to bleed. “Rey, are you all right?” The General was worrying over her.

“Yes, yes, you just surprised me is all.”

Leia sighed. She slowly pulled herself to her feet, dragging Rey with her. “Come, sit. Talk to me for a moment.”

“I-I really should get back to my training….” Rey stammered.

“Indulge an old woman, will you?” How was Rey to say no. She nodded briefly, letting Leia escort her to a worn bench in the little garden. Once seated, Leia gazed out at the faded flowers. “Tell me, Rey, are you feeling ok?”

Rey swallowed, “I-I think so.”

“Because its ok if you’re not.” She met the young girl’s eyes, “Its okay to feel overwhelmed, Rey. You carry so much on your shoulders.”

Rey sat there, feeling Leia reach into her mind. Rey sighed, “I saw him again, Leia.” She cast her vision down to the ground.

Leia inhaled sharply, “I thought he closed the bond.” 

“He did. I have barely felt him in the past year. Until last week, that is.” 

“You’ve kept this to yourself for a week? Oh Rey…”

Rey shrugged. “I-I don’t think he meant for it to happen. He seemed as surprised to see me as I him.”

“D-did he say anything?”

_ You’re not ready _ .

“No,” Rey lied. “He-he seemed like I caught him doing something he didn’t wish for me to see. At least, that’s what I felt from him.”

“Tell me, Rey. What did you see?”

“Not much. I couldn’t see his exact location but I could feel the heat...and there was sand...I could feel sand running through my fingertips. But the strange thing was…” she stopped. She began to chew on her bottom lip, hesitant to say anything further.

“What is it, Rey?”

She looked into Leia’s eyes. “He wasn’t dressed like Kylo Ren. No black clothes, no helmet. Wherever he was, he didn’t want anyone to know his identity.”

“Well that is strange,” agreed Leia, her brows knitting together as she mulled over the information.

“There was  _ something else _ ,” Rey whispered. Leia turned to look at her but Rey was faraway, lost in the memory. “There’s no more conflict in him,” she continued. “All I could feel was his resolve...but to what, I cannot say. He refused to show me anything more.”

“Well, then. That is... _ unfortunate _ ,” Leia replied.

Rey looked down to the ground, her head spinning from the memory. She conveniently left out the vision of Ben Solo comforting her moments before the General showed up. She would swear on her life he was real but it felt nothing like the bond with Kylo. He was more like her heart’s desire made whole rather than an actual flesh and blood man. She released a shaky breath. Was she going mad on top of everything else?

Leia’s worn hand came to clasp Rey’s, giving it a tight squeeze. “Have faith, Rey. As long as we have each other ...there is always hope.”

Rey managed to muster a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes.

“Rey, is there anything else?” Again she could feel Leia at the edge of her mind. Rey opened her mouth to respond but was thankfully interrupted by the sudden appearance of Poe.

He came sliding into the garden, clearly out of breath. “General...Rey...I’ve been looking for you everywhere.” 

Leia chuckled at her favorite excitable pilot, “What is it, Poe?”

His eyes travelled between Leia and Rey and back again. “I think ...I think you need to see this to believe it.”

He missed the exchange of worrisome looks between the two women as they rose to follow him.

******

Leia lifted the binoculars again, verifying what her old eyes were seeing. She turned to look at Poe, “What does he want?”

Poe cocked a brow, “To speak to General Leia Organa and the scavenger Rey.”

“Me? Why me?” Rey questioned.

Poe gave her his patented grin, “Says he has a message for the two of you...from the Supreme Leader of the First Order.”

The two women exchanged a look. 

“It's a trap!” Finn replied.

“Yes, Finn. I’m sure it is,” Leia said matter-of-factly. She turned to Lieutenant Connix, “Is he alone?”

“Just him and a pilot, ma'am.”

“And the Finalizer?” Poe asked.

“In orbit, but quiet.” Connix confirmed.

Leia turned to Rey, “What do you think, Rey?”

Rey sighed. “I-I suppose we could hear what he has to say. I could try to read his thoughts…”

“You can do that?” Finn looked at her in surprise.

“Maybe..” Rey confided.

“Ok then. Open the doors. Let's see what he wants,” Leia conceded.

Poe stepped in front of the women, blocking their way. “With all due respect, General, I don’t think that would be wise. I agree with Finn. It’s a trap.” 

“Poe. He’s my son. I want to hear what he has to say.” She pushed around the young pilot.

“Then I’m coming with you,” Poe replied.

“Me too!” Finn piped up.

“I had no doubt.” Leia smiled. “Open the door, Connix.” The young girl readily obliged.

Finn gave Rey’s shoulder a gentle squeeze. She covered his hand with hers, if only for a moment. They followed Poe and General Leia outside.

********

A short, thin, pale man with coiffed reddish hair stood alone in the courtyard of the old palace, caustically picking at his well-manicured fingernails. At the approach of the quartet, he pulled nervously at his collar. Poe and Finn raised blasters at him, and he shrank back.

“FN-2187,” Hux sneered.

“General Hugs,” came Poe’s response.

“Its Hux,” he ground out. 

“Gentlemen, gentlemen ...please. You have a message for me, General Hux?” Leia asked.

He swallowed, his gaze settled on Rey for a fleeting moment before turning back to Leia. “Our Supreme Leader requests the pleasure of your company.”

“You have to be kidding me!” Finn exclaimed.

“And why in heavens would we ever agree to such a thing, General Hux?” Leia’s voice was calm, neutral.

He sneered, “He is the Supreme Leader. You will do as he says.” He quickly shot Rey a look of disapproval. “You can stop trying to read my mind,  _ scavenger _ . You will just have to trust on my honor this is not a trap.”

“And why would we ever trust you?” Poe raised his blaster.

“Because I come with a truce.”

Poe and Finn both scoffed at him in unison. “Yeah, like we can believe you,” Finn said.

“I don’t care what  _ you  _ believe, FN-2187,” Hux replied, giving Finn a disapproving look.

“Finn! My name is Finn!”

_ Rey _ …

Kylo called to her in her mind. Quickly she scanned the area but saw nothing.

_ Beside you _ …

She turned to the left, and there he was right next to her, so close she could feel the heat from his body encompassing her. He was back in his trademark black ensemble, minus his imposing helmet. She stumbled back a step, quickly looking at her friends to see their reaction. But no one was paying any attention. They were still arguing.

“They can’t see or hear me,” he responded cooly. 

“Is-is this some kind of trick? Or is the bond evolving?”

“Neither. I’m simply in your head.”

Fear overtook her and she immediately tried to force a block against him within her mind.

“Stop...please. You’ll only give yourself a headache. And I don’t want to hurt you.”

She almost laughed. “And invading my mind isn’t hurting me?! Do you not remember the first time we met? What you did to me...what you let Snoke do to me!”

She thought she saw him flinch at the reminder. He quickly regained his composure, “I’m not invading...merely  _ projecting  _ myself into your thoughts. I cannot read what you are thinking.”

“And why should I believe you?”

He shrugged, “Try me. Think of something...anything...and gauge my reaction.”

She looked at him for a long moment then turned into her own mind. 

_ She thought back to their last conversation on Ahch-to. They reached out through their bond to touch hands, a mutual reassurance they were not alone. But this time, Luke didn’t interrupt them. As their hands slid against each other Kylo’s long fingers wrapped around Rey’s wrist. Suddenly he yanked her into his lap, her legs splayed as he fitted her against him, straddling his large thighs. She clung to his broad shoulders as their gazes met; their lips coming within inches of each other. She stared at his kissable mouth, wanting so much to draw his full bottom lip between her teeth and bite down. His hands drifted to cup her backside, fingers digging in as he shifted his hips, grinding against her feminine core _ …

Rey gasped, pulling herself from her thoughts. She looked up at him. He was standing there, calm, hands clasped behind his back, studying her. He cocked an eyebrow, “Are you alright? You look flushed.”

Rey realized her breathing was a bit labored. “Yes,” she hissed, “I’m fine.” She chewed on her lower lip, casting her vision to the ground. Where in hell had that come from?! She shook it away, afraid to dig any further, not wanting to hear the answer.

“Satisfied?” he asked.

Her gaze shot up to meet his, his word choice suspect considering her train of thought. But she quickly tried to hide her suspicion. “What is it you want?” she asked coldly, her tone sharp.

“Agree to meet with me.”

“No.” She didn’t even consider it.

“I  _ need  _ you to meet with me, Rey. There’s something you should know.”

“And if I don’t? What? You’ll have your TIE fighters level the place?” She paused before adding, “How is it you knew where to find us any way?”

“You really want to know?” he asked. 

_ How was he so calm?  _ “Yes! Of course!”

“Will you agree to meet with me?”

Her mouth dropped open for a second, then she closed it, considering his words. “I--I will agree to meet with you on a few conditions.”

“Name them.”

“Finn and Poe accompany us.” 

There was a flash of something in his eyes, almost like jealousy. “Is that all?”

“Your word - that no harm will come to anyone on this base.”

“Is my word enough?” he questioned.

She chose to ignore this. “That we will be treated as guests…”

A small smile tugged at the corners of his mouth as he remembered having Rey strapped into his interrogation chair, “Well, we both know how well I treat my guests…”

“That’s not funny.”

But the hint of warmth didn’t fade from his face. He cleared his throat, “Anything else?”

She opened her mouth to say something, but came up blank. “N-no. I mean, unless I think of something else, then no.”

“I agree to your demands.” He started to fade away.

“Wait!” she called after him.

He turned back to her, again cocking an eyebrow, “Think of something else already?”

She folded her arms across her chest, “How did you know we were here?”

He shrugged, keeping his face completely impassive, his voice devoid of emotion, “There’s a tracker on the Millennium Falcon.”

“What?!” she exclaimed.

“I had it placed there when I found it on Starkiller Base. Don’t bother looking for it. You won’t find it. Are we done now?”

She could do nothing but stare at him in disbelief. He has known all along where to find her. Ahch-to...Crait...the handful of places she’s been over the past year as they hid from him and the First Order.

“Rey…”

Her eyes met his, “Uh---yes. Alright. We have a deal.”

“Then I will see you soon.”

And he was gone.

Rey stumbled as the sounds of the world came crashing in. Poe and Finn were still arguing with Hux. Leia had her hand to her temple, her eyes closed in frustration. Rey glanced around, still looking for Kylo. 

Suddenly the comm strapped to Hux’s belt crackled. He immediately stopped arguing with the guys, putting his index finger in their face to silence them. Finn and Poe’s mouths dropped open in shock at how quickly they were being dismissed by the small General.

“This is General Hux.”

“General, the Supreme Leader is wondering what the delay is,” came a voice from the comm.

“Well you can tell the Supreme Leader the Rebel scum are refusing his invitation,” came the General's snarky reply.

“Rebel scum?!” Finn bellowed, lunging at Hux. Luckily Poe grabbed him in time. Hux stepped back, sneering at Finn.

The comm crackled again. “General Hux.”

Hux’s face fell at the sound of the smooth, deep voice resonating through the communication device. Leia’s head snapped up and even Finn and Poe fell silent. Rey noted he must now be wearing his helmet, his voice having that robotic, modulated sound.

Hux paused, staring daggers into his comm. He cleared his throat. “Supreme Leader.”

“Have FN-2187 and the one they call  _ Poe _ join General Organa and the scavenger Rey. This should help to allay any fears they may have that my invitation is disingenuine.” 

Even with his voice being modulated, it didn’t go unnoticed by Rey the way he said Poe’s name with almost spiteful inflection. That was strange...

Hux swallowed, looking up at Leia. Finn, Poe and Rey also looked at Leia. She gave a slight nod of acceptance. Hux released a shaky breath. “They have accepted your terms, Supreme Leader.”

Kylo offered no response. The comm was dead. Hux stared at it for a moment before replacing it on his belt. “Well then, shall we?”

Leia grabbed hold of Rey, pulling her close. “Tell me we are not walking into a trap.”

“H-he gave me his word. He just wants to talk.”

Leia sighed. “I’ve waited for this moment for so long. Yet…”

“It doesn’t feel right?” Rey asked.

“I can’t put my finger on it.”

“I know. But he confessed he’s known our location for the past year and he’s never made a move against us. I-I think we can trust him...just this once.” Gods above, Rey  _ hoped  _ she was right.

“Alright, Rey.” Leia patted her hand. 

Poe and Finn came to their side.

“Are we doing this?” Finn asked.

“Yes.” Leia confirmed.

“Well, what’s the plan?” Poe asked.

“The  _ plan _ is I’m going to see my son.”


	3. A Meeting of Minds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo Ren meets with the Resistance

Rey swallowed down her nervousness as she watched out the large window as their ship grew closer to the Finalizer. Finn joined her.

“I don’t like this, Rey,” he whispered. “I mean didn’t Skywalker sacrifice himself so we could escape the First Order and now here we are, Kylo Ren’s personal guests. He killed Han. Hell, he tried to kill me.” He shook his head, “No, I don’t like it.”

Rey tried to give him a reassuring smile, “I don’t disagree with you, Finn. But we are the face of the Resistance. It’s our duty to those people on that planet to at least hear what he has to say. If he really is offering a truce, it’s only fair we listen to his terms.”

Finn nodded, but she could feel his doubt radiating off of him. “Besides, if he gets out of line…” she tapped the lightsaber on her hip. “You and I have defeated him once before.” She gave him a playful nudge.

Finn smiled, “We have, haven’t we?” He sucked in a deep breath and let it out slowly. “We can do this.”

“Yes, we can,” she reassured him.

Finn stepped away from her then, repeating it like a mantra. General Hux quickly took his place, sidling up next to her.

She gave him an annoyed look, “Something you need?”

He looked her up and down, “I have to ask -- how did you do it?”

“Do what?” she questioned.

“Kill Snoke. He was so powerful and you’re so...so... _ ordinary _ .”

Panic rose in Rey’s chest.  _ Killed Snoke _ ?!  _ Kylo Ren, you sneaky bastard, _ she thought. She would make him pay for that later. She looked Hux in the eye, “He was powerful...but I was better.”

Hux scoffed. Then another question came to his mind. “So you killed Snoke but left Kylo Ren alive. You must admit that was a strange strategy from someone trying to  _ end  _ the First Order.” He was bating her.

“I didn’t know Ren was alive. The Resistance cruiser had just ripped through the ship. It was all I could do to escape with my life.” In that moment, Rey was grateful she was getting so used to lying.

“Hmmm…” he considered her answer. “Well, lucky you.”

And yet the way he said it, Rey didn’t think he really meant it. An alarm sounded at that moment, thankfully pulling Hux’s attention away from Rey . But an uneasy feeling settled over her. The ship was docking. And she was about to come face to face with the one man she had hoped she would never see again. She secretly prayed he’d wear his mask; because she wasn’t sure she was strong enough to look him in those sorrowful brown eyes and not join him on the darkside.

*******

Kylo stood in front of the large pane of glass overlooking the hangar, hands clasped behind his back. He watched as his “guests” departed the shuttle, Hux giving them a flippant tour of the facilities as he led them to their destination. Ah, Hux ...ever the gracious host. 

His eyes fell on his mother, and his stomach churned. He’d never been so grateful for his mask than in this moment, afraid of what she might see if they looked one another in the eye. The shame he might not be able to hide.

He quickly looked away, surveying FN-2187 first before his eyes fell on the true prize —Rey. His heart thumped hard in his chest as he took in her appearance. Still the little scavenger, she was dressed as such with her hair pulled back in three knots. He swallowed, then slowly let a small piece of his shields fall, opening himself to her. She stopped in her tracks, quickly scanning her surroundings for him. Her eyes fell on the window, but the glass was only one way and she couldn’t see him. 

He tapped at the door to her mind, grabbing onto the first thought he found. He smirked. She was wondering if they would  meet him in the throne room, his large form draped across the chair like a petulant child playing at being ruler. He shook his head. How wrong she would be. He took great satisfaction in knowing there was no throne room...no chair raised on a dias. He wasn’t Snoke; driven to dominate his subordinates with his superiority. He found greater loyalty in treating his people with respect rather than fear. The fear was there, to be sure, he was their Supreme Leader after all. But he didn’t define his rule with it. Yes, he was much changed since Crait. He couldn’t wait for Rey to see it.

She was still staring in his general direction when her comrade, the one called Poe, came to her, getting her attention once again to follow. He took her hand in his and gave it a squeeze. 

Acting on instinct, Kylo’s hand immediately rose to the glass, grasping onto the Force, ready to make Poe pay for his insolence. How dare he touch her in such a familiar way! A jealous rage sparked within him...at what he could not say. Rey wasn’t his. She would never be his.

He felt her in his mind. She was sensing the fluctuation in his emotions, her instinct being to calm him. He slammed the door shut on her, closing himself off. He may have reconciled his desire for her over the last year, but he’d be damned before he’d let her pity him.

He watched as Hux led them away, Poe still holding Rey’s hand, whispering something to her in her ear. Kylo turned away, no longer wanting to look.

He caught his reflection in the glossy screen of a monitor. He sighed heavily. Yes, today was definitely a good day to wear a mask.

********

Rey internally sighed with relief when General Hux led them into a spacious meeting room with a large stretched table surrounded by chairs. Just the thought of being in another throne room with the great Kylo Ren was enough to make her stomach knot and chills to raise on her skin. But this was ok. It was formal and didn't scream his usual superiority. 

She wasn’t sure what she had felt in the hangar, after departing the shuttle. Only that he was close and he was experiencing an internal turmoil. She reckoned this would be the first time he’s been in the same room with his mother in a very long while. Leia was anxious too. Rey had tried to make him feel calm but he shut her out. She wasn’t surprised. He’d only think it was pity. And maybe he was right, but in her heart, Rey wanted them to be  _ friends _ . That was naive and she chided herself for again pretending that Kylo Ren and Ben Solo were still the same man. She’d have to be more on-guard with these feelings. He had made it clear Ben Solo no longer existed...he was weak where Kylo was strong. He’s going to pull on his strength for this meeting -- more than likely try to bully them into a truce of some kind where the First Order wins and the Resistance folds. She sighed heavily.

Poe was immediately by her side. “You alright?”

“Yes, just not sure what to expect from all this.” She wasn’t sure why, all of a sudden, Poe seemed to be by her side since they stepped off the ship. She made to grab one of the chairs, but he grabbed it first, pulling it out for her to sit.  _ Strange _ …

He bent down to whisper in her ear, “Don’t worry. Finn and I have an exit strategy in mind in case things go South.”

“Wait...what?” she stammered. But he had already moved on to take the seat next to her.

Suddenly the air shifted in the room, and she forgot Poe’s words in an instance. She  _ felt  _ him first, his essence filling the room and shifting the balance in the Force. Without having to look, she knew he stood directly behind her, his large imposing body filling the door frame.

“That will be all, General Hux,” he stated, his voice deep and mechanical through his mask.

“Sir?” Hux was surprised. But when Kylo turned his head sharply in his direction, Hux knew it was time to leave. “Yes, Supreme Leader,” he bit out.

Rey knew her friends had turned to see their host but she chose to remain stoic, facing forward. So many feelings radiated from Leia. She could feel anguish...despair...anger...and then, more confusing, pride. She looked over at Leia, who stared at her son. As Rey had guessed, he was dressed in his full Kylo Ren, Supreme Leader ensemble, complete with floor length cape and mask. Leia was disappointed, seeing that mask.

_ I have another demand! _ Rey screamed in her mind. She looked up at him. He was seating himself at the head of the table. She looked down in her lap, closing her eyes, focusing all her will on the Force. She repeated herself, trying hard to break through his walls.

_ “I heard you the first time,”  _ came his deep voice in her head.

Her head shot up and she turned to look at him. He was staring back at her, his head tilted to the side.

_ “Say it,” _ he ground out.

_ Take off the mask _ . 

He didn’t respond. He just continued to stare at her.

_ For your mother. Please. She wants to see her son, not the...the _ …

“ _ Monster who killed her husband _ ?” he ventured.

She swallowed.

“ _ What’s your relationship with the pilot _ ?”

_ What?! _

“ _ I’ve met all your demands. If you want this, answer the question. _ ”

_ Fine.  _ She paused. _ We are friends _ .

Rey saw Kylo turn away, his gloved hand fisting against the armrest of his chair. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He unclenched his fingers and brought his hands up to his mask. He pressed the release; it opened with a mechanical whir. He pulled it off and laid it on the table. His eyes immediately fell on her. Those brown eyes...no longer full of sorrow just  _ hard  _ \-- another mask. Her response was to look down at her hands in her lap.

Leia released a shaky breath, “Well, here we all are.”

Poe leaned back in his chair, adopting his signature cocky pilot smile as he looked at Kylo Ren. “So I guess you summoned us here to negotiate your surrender. Very well, we accept.”

Kylo cocked an eyebrow, replying, “And you are…?”

Rey felt a small smile pull at her lips which she hid behind her hand.

“Just the best fighter pilot of the Resistance.”

“Ah.” Kylo paused, “Weren’t you the one who managed to get all those people killed last year trying to take down a Dreadnought?”

Poe shot to his feet, “We took down that Dreadnought!”

“And lost your entire bomber fleet doing it,” Kylo was calm; almost bored in his tone.

“Gentlemen, please!” Leia yelled. It was enough to silence both men.

Rey looked up at Kylo. He was staring at her; his face completely impassive.

“ _ Just friends, you say _ ?” His voice resounded in her head.

She didn’t answer but could not keep her lips from twitching into a little grin.

“Poe, sit down.” Leia commanded. The pilot did as he was told, his gaze never leaving Kylo.

Leia turned her attention back to her son, “You asked us here. Why don’t you start with the reason?”

Kylo met his mother’s gaze. Rey tried to get a read on his thoughts but he offered nothing. His mind was completely blank.

“I’m here to offer the Resistance a truce,” he started. 

Poe scoffed. Leia gave him a  _ Look  _ that quickly shut him up.

“Continue,” Leia said.

“It would be more like a consolidation of power, if you will. Your rebels will come aboard The Finalizer and we will…  _ work together _ to…”

“To establish the agenda of the First Order? Are we seriously listening to this?!” Finn exclaimed.

Kylo turned his attention to Rey, “Was it really necessary to bring these two along?”

Rey opened her mouth to respond but it was Leia who replied, “Finn and Poe are valuable members of the Resistance. They should be here.”

Kylo kept his focus on Rey, “What I’m offering you...all of you… is a chance to stop running. You will have access to our ships, medical facilities, the mess hall; all the best the First Order has to offer.”

“Why?” Rey asked.

“Because we are not the enemy,” he stated firmly. “Not today, at least.”

_ Ben, if this is some attempt to get me to join you by using my friends as part of the negotiations, please don’t go this way. _ Rey pushed her thought to him. She waited for a reaction, but none came.

Leia was talking, “I’m having trouble understanding how the First Order is not the enemy. Last year you were bent on wiping us out on Crait. I doubt you were planning on taking any prisoners.” This got Kylo’s attention and he looked at his mother. She continued, “Now you want to provide us with food and shelter… forgive me for being skeptical.”

_ Ben, please...don’t do this for us...for me _ … _ It won’t end the way you think it will. _

“I understand your skepticism, General. And you’re right in believing I’m not offering this out of the goodness of my heart. I have no heart.” Leia flinched at his cold words. “Let me start from the beginning and maybe then you’ll understand.”

Leia nodded in agreement, but Rey could see the hurt in the old woman’s eyes. She tried again.  _ Ben, she’s your mother _ … But it was no use, he had effectively blocked her from his mind.

“After what happened on the Supremacy…” Kylo started, his gaze catching Rey’s, “...and then on Crait, I was indeed ready to fulfill Supreme Leader Snoke’s plan of ending the Rebellion. But I knew before that could happen, I needed to end the Force bond I share with Rey.”

“The Force what-now?” interrupted Finn. 

Kylo tilted his head, studying Rey for a moment, asking, “You didn’t tell them?” 

All eyes were on Rey now. “I didn’t think it was important since you accomplished in closing it,” she bit out. She couldn’t explain why she was hurt by his words - by his attempt in closing their bond. She had wanted him out of her life -- hadn’t she? 

“She confessed it me,” Leia chimed in. 

“So,what exactly is a Force bond?” Poe asked, staring at Rey.

Kylo sat silent. He suddenly seemed more interested in a speck of invisible fuzz on his leather glove than the topic at hand.

“It’s...well...when the occasion calls for it...we ... _ Oh for the love of God _ , are you seriously not going to answer?” Rey chided Kylo.

He looked up, cocking an eyebrow, “But you were doing such a fine job at explaining it.” He leaned forward in his chair, resting his forearms on the table, “Oh very well. The Force has tied us together. At certain intervals, I can see her and she can see me. We can touch, sometimes interact with the environment but it comes and goes at the will of the Force.”

“Touch? You two  _ touch _ ?” Leave it to Finn to pick up on that.

“I still don’t understand. Why would the Force do that?” Poe asked.

“It wasn’t the Force. It was Snoke. He confessed as much before his demise,” Rey replied.

“If it was Snoke, it would have died with him,” Kylo countered, a hint of irritation in his voice.

_ Then I was right before, wasn’t I, Ben?  _ ** _You _ ** _ were responsible for it. _

Again, he ignored her, choosing to carry on with his story, “I scoured texts and old lore, both Jedi and Sith. There were mentions of bonds between Master and Apprentice but never one such as we were sharing. It wasn't until I got a hold of my Grandfather’s journals…”

“Vader’s journals?” Leia asked, surprised.

He glared at her, “Like I said, my  _ grandfather's _ journals. There was mention of a great power hidden in some unknown region of the galaxy. Emperor Palpatine spent much of the Empire’s time and resources trying to locate it. I realized then, Snoke, too, had been searching for it, as well. I thought maybe if I find it, I could use it to destroy the bond.”

“So let me get this straight, you went searching for some  _ ultimate power _ and we are supposed to trust you weren’t planning to use said power to destroy the Resistance and take over the galaxy? Yeah right…” Finn interjected.

Kylo looked at Rey, “I only wanted to free us from the Bond. I can end the Resistance and take over the galaxy without some unnamed power.”

“Did you find it - this power?” Rey questioned.

“That’s a difficult question to answer,” he replied.

“It’s a simple yes or no,” Leia chided.

Kylo looked at Leia. “Yes, I found it.”

Everyone in the room gasped.

“But I wasn’t the first.”

“Someone beat you to it. Who?” questioned Leia.

“Emperor Palpatine, of course.” As if it was just so obvious.

“That’s impossible!” Leia exclaimed. “Vader killed him to save Luke.”

Kylo cringed at the mention of Luke Skywalker. “Yes, well, no one is ever truly gone.”

Leia let this information rumminate for a minute. “If what you are saying is true and Darth Sidious is still alive…” She let the thought trail off.

“He’s rebuilding the Empire,” Kylo finished, his tone even.

Leia gave him a startled look. 

“As I said, we are not your enemy today.”

“A-and you saw this? You saw…” Leia stammered.

“I’m finding this all very hard to believe,” Poe interrupted, anger in his words. He shifted in his seat, “If what you are saying is true, wouldn’t he just recruit you?”

“He tried,” Kylo stated, shrugging.

Everyone was stunned into silence and turned to him.

“Did he succeed?” Leia questioned.

Kylo sighed, “Would I be here if he had? I said no.”

“And he just let you walk away?” Poe questioned.

“Not exactly, no.” Kylo replied. He turned to Leia, “If you don’t believe me, have Rey look into my mind. I can show her the truth.”

“Memories can be manipulated,” Leia said.

“Not when you’re bonded through the Force.”

Leia looked at Rey, “Rey?”

Rey stared at her hands, afraid to meet Leia’s gaze and even more afraid to look at Kylo. She didn’t want to take a trip through his mind. She feared touching his darkness but more importantly, what if she found his light -- that one spark that had given her so much hope last year that he would turn. Could she trust him?

_ Tell me the truth _ , she pleaded.  _ Are you doing this so I’ll join you _ ?

“ _ No, Rey _ ,” he replied.

She swallowed.  _ Did you discover a way to end our bond _ ?

“ _ Yes _ .”

_ Will you do it -- end it _ ?

“ _ No _ .” He paused. “ _ Do you want it to end _ ?”

She didn’t answer him. She truthfully didn’t know how to respond. Cutting herself off from him felt wrong, but  _ being  _ with him didn’t feel right. 

“Rey, hon, you only have to do what makes you comfortable,” Leia pushed.

Rey sighed. “It’s fine. I can do it.” She rose to her feet, stepping around the table to close the distance between them. He didn’t even flinch. He just sat back in his chair, his arms crossing over his broad chest.

Rey swallowed. He looked up at her with those big brown eyes, shaking her composure. Her hand trembled slightly as she reached out to him -- her fingers close to his mind without physically touching him.

“ _ Breathe, Rey _ .” He was in her mind. “ _ I’ve seen you do this without even trying _ .”

_ That was before _ … she replied.

“ _ Before _ ?”

_ You come from nothing. You’re nothing _ . But it wasn’t her voice she pushed into his mind, but his own. 

“ _ Rey… sweet Rey, you misunderstood everything I said in that throne room…”  _ He sighed deeply. _ “Rey, you’re the strongest person I know _ .  _ There is no reason to doubt yourself _ .” 

He held her gaze, suddenly flooding her mind with the highlights of their relationship: how fascinating he found her on Takadana that he couldn’t resist taking her; the power he sensed in her when they sparred in the interrogation chair; their fight in the snow covered forest; she had intrigued and infuriated him by beating him with Anakin’s lightsaber; and the courage she showed on the Supremacy - facing Snoke, taking his torture yet still defending him,  _ her  _ Ben Solo. She was and still is his pull to the light. 

Kylo ripped down the walls he so effectively had built against her in the past year in a matter of seconds, all to give her the precious gift of seeing herself through his eyes. It rocked her to her core. She stumbled back from him. Finn quickly stood, catching her, steadying her.

“What happened?” Poe was on his feet.

“N-nothing. N-nothing.” Rey patted Finn’s hand and he released her.

“That wasn’t nothing.” Poe looked accusingly at Kylo Ren. He was relaxed in his chair, his vision cast downward. “What did you do to her?”

Rey stepped in front of Poe, “He didn’t do anything. I-I… it’s just been a very long while since I’ve done this. That’s all.”

“You’ll want to listen to her, Flyboy,” Kylo replied. “I’ll make sure you’re the first to know when I finally do  _ do something to her _ .” Kylo didn’t even try to hide the innuendo in his statement, offering Poe the slightest smirk.

Poe lunged at Kylo. Finn tried to get between them but before he had a chance, Poe was knocked off his feet and slid into the wall on the opposite side of the room. Finn turned to look at Kylo but the man hadn’t even flinched. He was still sitting in his chair, his forearms resting on the armrests, his hands clasped in his lap. Finn looked at Rey. She was holding out her hand towards Poe. Poe pulled himself up quickly. He stared at Rey, not even trying to hide the shock on his face.

“R-Rey…” Poe stammered.

“I’m sorry. He would’ve done worse, I’m sure.” Rey turned to Leia, but the old woman’s eyes were closed, her brow furrowed, her head in her hand.

“Finn, I think you and Poe should step out in the hall. Regain your composure.” Leia advised, her eyes still shut, her fingers rubbing her temples.

Poe didn’t even hesitate, stomping to the exit. Finn gave Rey a  _ look  _ before following Poe out of the room. The door closed behind them.

Leia sighed, “You shouldn’t have provoked him.”

“He’s easy to provoke,” Kylo replied.

“He’s hot-headed, to be sure, but still a good man.”

“Whereas I am not…” he ground out.

Leia’s eyes filled with sadness. “Ben…” she sighed, reaching for one of his hands. But he yanked it away before she could touch him, his hand clenching into a fist. He looked away from his mother.

Rey came to his side. “Do-do you still want me to-to try?”

He looked up at her, and the sorrow he was desperately trying to conceal radiated from him. She could feel the weight of it crushing him. Rey suddenly felt responsible. He let down his walls for her, to assuage her fears and lack of confidence in her abilities. 

“Leia, perhaps if you left us alone this would go more smoothly,” Rey suggested.

“Do you think that is a wise?” Leia asked.

“What,  _ mother _ , afraid I may sway Rey to the darkside?” he spit out.

Leia stood. “All right, you win. I’ll give you 10 minutes.” She made her way to the exit. Rey saw her look back once at her son, disappointment coming from her in waves. Rey couldn’t be sure if it was all directed at Kylo though as she could sense Leia’s inner turmoil.

As soon as the door closed, Kylo heaved a sigh of relief. He looked up at Rey then. Their eyes met and they both started to speak but stopped. What could they say? 

Kylo straightened in his chair. “Let’s get this over with. When she says 10 minutes, she really means 5. Any longer and she fears I will corrupt you.” He wasn’t kidding.

Rey lifted herself to sit on the tabletop in front of him. “We don’t have to, you know. I believe you.”

She could see him tense, his jawline grinding as he thought over her words. He rose from his chair, going to stand in front of a set of computer monitors, his hands clasping behind him.

It seemed like time stretched before them but it was only a minute before he replied, “Did you mean it -- that my words caused you so much distress that you lost your faith in the Force?” He wasn’t looking at her; his gaze pinpointing on the monitors.

“You weren’t wrong. But there were other factors too.”

“Like?”

She shrugged. “My doubt in my decision-making, for one. I don’t know. With Skywalker gone, I became the spark of hope for the whole Resistance. All I did was move a bunch of rocks and suddenly I’m the symbol of the Rebellion. This -- all of this -- it’s been too much too soon. And...” She stopped.

He glanced at her over his shoulder. “Say it, Rey.” 

She sighed, “Once you closed our bond...I knew...I knew I was once again back in that cave on Ahch-to, completely alone. Yes, I had my friends but...they couldn’t understand what I was going through.” She looked down at her hands, guilt overwhelming her. “I can’t explain it. It’s - it’s like... people keep telling me they know me. No one does.”

He turned to face her, “But I do.”

She looked up at him, their gazes meeting. He closed the distance between. He leaned in, his hands settling on the table on each side of her, pinning her in his embrace. “I’ve seen the best and the worst of you, Rey. I know how lonely power can be. It’s as I told you before, I feel it too.”

“You’ve changed. I feel no conflict in you now. Turmoil but no conflict. Is it because you finally have everything you want?”

He cocked an eyebrow, “And what is it that I have, Rey?” His eyes drifted to her lips.

She swallowed, “Power of the Supreme Leader, master of your own destiny, a possible truce with the Resistance...and your strength in the Force is unrivaled.”

“And that’s  _ everything  _ I want?”

“What else is there?” she questioned.

“Someone to share it with,” he whispered, the warmth from his words dancing over her mouth.

Her chest tightened. A part of her wanted to lean into him and accept what he was offering -- let him  _ finally  _ kiss her. But she just couldn’t bring herself to do it. Yes, he was a changed man but she had yet to see if it was for the better or worse.

She opened her mouth to say something but it didn’t matter. He already  _ knew  _ \-- had heard it in her mind before she could speak. 

He pulled away from her and took a step back. “Fear not, Rey. I won’t be repeating my offer which you found to be so disgusting.” He grabbed his chair and sat down. “Let’s get this over with, shall we?”

And like that, the softness dissipated from his eyes replaced with a hard mask of indifference. She could already feel him rebuilding the wall in his mind, shielding himself from the coming intrusion.

She slid off the table, coming to stand beside him. She held up her hand. She could see him digging his fingers into the armrests of the chair, fighting the urge to move away from her. She closed her eyes, focusing on the Force. Slowly she crept into his mind. He was already focusing on his memories, making it easier for her by paving the way.

*******

It was an ice planet, at the edge of the Outer Rim. The First Order had discovered a large energy signature on an otherwise uninhabited planet. Kylo left The Finalizer behind, choosing to take his Tie Whisperer to investigate. But once he landed, he felt it -- the energy signature surged and he sensed more power than he had ever felt before. The entire world was unbalanced… only pure darkness lived here -- the Force corrupted. And it wanted him as its vessel. 

It crept inside him...

Rey could feel his pain… the darkness preying on his every insecurity… his every want and need. His  _ desire… _ It spread inside her...a warmth that made her blood feel like it was boiling, burning her skin from the inside out. It crawled from her outstretched hand, up the length of her arm; spreading across her chest, giving rise to a deep blush pinkening her skin. It traveled up the column of her throat next, knocking the wind from her lungs. She couldn’t breathe. She was suffocating under the darkness.

“ _ Push through it _ …” His words echoed in the back of her mind. “ _ It’s only a memory. It’s not real. _ ”

She tried to focus. But with every attempt to take a breath, she felt herself pulled further beneath the darkness. It was thick; filling her nostrils and her mouth. She struggled to pull herself free but it was no use. And she could hear something in the distance...a mechanical whir of parts and cranks. Then laughter… a craggy laugh, equal parts cruel and cold. 

_ Your coming together is your undoing _ … This voice she didn’t recognize.

She was falling. She hit the ice hard; feeling her arm crack under the pressure. She looked down. It wasn’t her arm...she recognized the dark tunic; the black gloved hand.  _ Kylo… _ . 

She could breathe again. Cradling her broken arm, she tried to stand. The ice under her feet was slippery, wet. There was a rumble beneath her. The ice started to crack, giving out under her. She turned to run. Large shards of ice split, blocking her path. She fell through the ice, plunging back into the cold, suffocating darkness. She opened her mouth to scream, but the thick emptiness filled her, drowning out her voice. 

Suddenly her feet found purchase. Something was rising out of the ice. She could stand now. The darkness shifted as she rose higher and higher. The blue light from a nearby moon shone brightly around her, giving her a way to better see what was happening. She was standing on a Star Destroyer -- larger than that of the First Order -- as it pulled itself free from the icy depths of the planet. She did a full 360 turn. She was surrounded by similar ships; all bathed in the eerie blue light.

_ Your coming together is your undoing _ …

She covered her eyes as that voice rang inside her head.

_ ReyReyReyReyReyReyRey _ …..

She screamed; the roar of a hundred ships making it useless to be heard.

She felt him then...Kylo. He wrapped her in his embrace. He pushed the images from her mind; taking away the darkness...the pain...pulling it inside himself.

She sucked in her breath...her lungs clearing; no longer suffocating under the weight of pure evil. 

“ _ You imagine an ocean...I see it -- I see the island _ …” Kylo’s voice comforted her.

She opened her eyes, not realizing they had been closed. She was back on Ahch-to. The waves cracked against the rocks. She watched as Kylo retraced her steps to the now burned tree of the Jedi. He placed his hand on the sacred wood, closing his eyes as he let himself feel the Force within.

A loud clang of metal startled her and she turned around.

She was greeted by the burning rays of the sun beating down on Jakku. The AT-AT she had once called home loomed over Kylo. This was the moment when the bond had reopened. She could feel his curiosity melding with something else as he disappeared into the old relic. What was he feeling? It was secreted away; secure behind the walls he had built.

_ Follow him… _ A voice whispered in her head.

She took a step towards the AT-AT but stopped. The sun was fading; a blueish tint covering the desert sand. 

_ Creak _ ...Boom... _ creak _ ...BOOM…

She looked down. The sand faded away and she was once again standing on the icy surface of the planet from before.

_ Creak _ ...Boom... _ creak _ ...BOOM…

She refused to turn around. That direction lay pure, unadulterated evil. She could feel it with every fibre of her being. 

There was movement in front of her. Kylo approached from the darkness to come stand before her but he didn’t see her. He looked beyond her to whatever was behind her. 

_ ReyReyReyReyReyReyRey _ …..

Kylo stepped through her, approaching something ...no,  _ someone _ . Rey tried to turn to stop him but she found herself rooted to the spot. She couldn’t move; her feet were encased in the ice. It slid up her legs, her thighs, her waist. She tried to scream for Kylo but the ice froze the breath in her lungs, muting her. She was pitched forward. The cruel laughter surrounded her as she fell…

*******

Rey stumbled, falling forward. Kylo reached up and grabbed her, steadying her. She was gasping for air as she pulled free of his mind. 

She looked up into his eyes, “Wh-what was that?”

His breathing was also labored. “Our bond…”

She pushed away from him, stumbling as she regained her footing. “No. No. You’re hiding something.”

He stood. “You saw what you needed to see. Nothing more.”

She brought her palm to her forehead, pain slicing through her mind as she tried to focus, “Ships. Destroyers.”

“Imperial Destroyers; bent on destroying the galaxy.”

Rey shook her head, her arms hugging herself, “There was more… something you didn’t want me to see.”

He drew himself up to his full height, crossing his arms defensively against his chest. “You don’t trust me.” It was a statement; not a question.

“No, I don’t.”

He snorted. “Then this has been a waste of my time.” He reached around her to grab his mask from the table. He thrust it on as he pressed the keypad to open the door. Hux, Finn, Poe and Leia nearly fell inside the room. 

He pushed through them. “My offer has been rescinded. Get off my ship.” He walked away.


	4. The Empire Strikes Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey begins to regret not trusting Kylo Ren.

_ 3 Days Later _:

Chewie roared. 

Rey sighed. “Well it has to be here somewhere. Keep checking.”

Chewie whimpered once before again lowering himself into the bowels of the Millennium Falcon. Rey returned to the pilot’s chair with a heavy heart, completely exhausted both physically and mentally. They had spent the last 3 days ripping apart every aspect of the Millennium Falcon, looking for the First Order’s tracker, with no luck. They couldn’t leave until they found the damn thing, wanting assurance that the next place they fled, the First Order couldn’t easily follow.

That Kylo Ren couldn’t follow….

He hadn’t tried to reach out to her since the failed meeting. She tested their bond a handful of times, but he had effectively closed himself off. Not that she had anything to say to him. She was haunted by the images she had pulled from his mind… the amount of suffocating darkness he had endured. How had he escaped from such pure evil, seemingly unscatched? The clues were there, yet she couldn’t quite piece it together. Kylo was hiding something… something he saw or found on that ice planet. It went beyond the Empire’s new Destroyers.

She had given Leia and the others the abridged version of events during her tour of Kylo’s mind. They had enough to deal with this knowledge of the rising Empire than to worry about what Kylo Ren may be hiding. She would carry this burden for them. Besides, something within her told her it had little to do with the Resistance and the First Order. Whatever he was hiding was personal… he wanted it kept from her and her alone. But if he was keeping secrets, then he couldn’t be trusted. End of story.

A knot in the pit of her stomach twisted at the thought of never seeing him again. It filled her with self-loathing to have these feelings for this man. He sure as hell didn’t deserve them…

_ You imagine an ocean...I see it -- I see the island _… Rey squeezed her eyes shut, willing his voice, the memory to go away. She wouldn’t think on it -- she refused to acknowledge that when the cracked parts of his mind had tried to punish her, he had been there to comfort her. No, he was a monster… he didn’t deserve to be thought of as anything other than that.

“Rey?”

Rey’s eyes snapped open and she turned to see Finn standing in the cockpit. He looked concerned.

“You all right, Rey?” Finn questioned.

“Y-yes. Just trying to think like a First Order engineer and figure out where he hid that damn tracker.” She turned back around to stare out the window.

Finn came and took the co-pilot seat next to her. “Did it ever occur to you that Ren was lying?”

_ He had no idea _. She looked at him, “Then how do we explain how he knew where to find us?”

He shrugged, “I don’t know.” He paused before adding, “Maybe it’s the bond thing you two share…”

Rey straightened in her chair. “Is that what people are saying?”

Again he shrugged, looking down at his hands. “You have to admit, it’s a little strange… this connection you share.”

“Yes, well, I don’t fully understand it myself.”

“That’s my point! If he’s controlling it, how do you know he’s not here listening to us right now?!”

“Because I would feel him,” she replied sullenly, looking away from him. “He’s a part of me…” she whispered.

“Rey, do you have feelings for him?”

A single tear escaped, rolling down her cheek as she answered, “Yes.” She swiped it away with the back of her hand.

Finn sighed. “I kinda figured when you threw Poe across the room when he went to attack Ren.”

“I honestly was only protecting Poe in that moment. Kylo would’ve killed him.”

“Tell me you’re not thinking about joining the First Order just to be with him,” Finn whispered.

Another tear. “No. I- I thought I could turn him ...last year on the Supremacy. He saved me from Snoke..”

“_ He _ killed Snoke,” Finn interrupted, his hand covering his face.

“Yes. He did it to save me. He wanted me to join him… to rule beside him but-but I refused. We broke the lightsaber fighting for control of it.”

He looked over at her, “And now? This truce? Just another ploy to get you close to him?”

She shook her head, “I don’t believe so. He’s seen what’s coming. I think he wants to save us... myself and Leia...the rest of the Resistance is just collateral.”

Finn leaned back in his chair, taking it all in. “This is why you’ve been so distant in the last year.”

“I hate myself everyday for the way I feel.” 

“You could have come to me, Rey. You could have talked to me. We started this together. We’re going to end it together.” He reached over and took her hand, interlocking their fingers.

She smiled, “Why are you always grabbing my hand?” She gave him a tender squeeze.

He chuckled. “That’s what friends do.”

“I haven’t been a good friend, Finn,” she whispered.

“No, Rey ...you've been the best.” He squeezed her hand as more tears tumbled down her cheeks. She pulled free of him to wipe them away.

“So, tell me, what do you see in him? It’s the outfit, am I right? He definitely knows how to wear a cape.”

Rey burst out laughing. It felt good to laugh with Finn. It felt good to finally tell someone how she felt.

“You should see him without the cape,” Rey replied.

Finn’s mouth dropped open, “Whoa! Whoa! Too much information!” But Finn’s smile was contagious and Rey suddenly felt like maybe...just maybe...everything would be ok.

His smile faded a little. “You know, he was there, on my first and only mission. The night on Jakku…”

Rey swallowed nervously.

“He...uh...he _ knew… _knew I doubted my role as stormtrooper… that I couldn’t kill. He sensed it in me. He could’ve killed me, right then and there. But he didn’t. He could’ve killed me on Starkiller Base too. Again, he didn’t.”

“What are saying, Finn?”

He shrugged, “I don’t know, Rey. I think maybe we were wrong in not accepting his truce.”

Rey was shocked. “This coming from you, Finn.”

“From what you said, this Empire… they sound like the true enemy. And from what I saw during our brief visit on The Finalizer… things were different. That wasn’t the First Order I remember. Snoke’s gone… Phasma’s gone… They have resources we don’t have… I don't know. Maybe I’m wrong. I’m wrong…. Right?”

Rey sighed, “I wish I knew.”

Finn stood. He placed his hand on her shoulder, “Whatever you decide, Rey, I’m with you.”

She gave a short nod, patting his hand. He turned to leave. Finn had given Rey much to think about. Even if they wanted to accept his offer, they had no way of contacting him. Not to mention the fact he had rescinded it when she told him she couldn’t trust him. She needed to speak with Leia. The General hadn’t really been herself after everything, but it was time Rey confessed what was really happening between her and Kylo. Together they could figure out what to do next…

Rey, suddenly feeling like a weight was lifted off her shoulders, jumped out of the pilot’s seat and made her way to the hangar door. She was surprised to see Finn standing them, his mouth agape as he stared up at the sky. 

“Finn, I thought you left.”

He looked at her, fear all over his face, “Rey, I think we have a problem.”

She followed his gaze. There, above them, sat four Star Destroyers. But these weren’t from the First Order; this was the Empire.

  
  
  
  


*******

Finn ran as fast as he could go, leaping over downed tree limbs. Blaster fire flew around him as red Sith stormtroopers filed out from transports, shooting at anything that moved. Finn dove behind the wall of a demolished building, pressing his back against it. He needed to get his hands on one of those blasters or he’d never stand a chance. Hopefully Rey was able to get back to the compound to warn the others. He needed to find Rose. Today of all days she took a team to scavenge for parts. He prayed she was back at the compound, but he couldn’t take the chance that she was still out here...wounded or worse.

He took a deep breath as he saw the end of a blaster moving towards him. He waited a heartbeat before taking his elbow and jamming it into the face of the trooper as he came around the corner. He grabbed the blaster, using the butt of the gun to hit the man in the face, knocking him out. He went back into position behind the wall, blaster in hand. 

He had a brief glimpse of the perimeter. There were at least 30 Sith troopers coming through the trees of the forest. They were going to need a miracle, plain and simple. Finn closed his eyes, picturing Rose’s smile in his mind. He should have told her how he felt. Now, he may never get the chance.

He opened his eyes, released his breath and withdrew from his hiding place. He started firing, hitting trooper after trooper. But it was no use. More and more appeared from the trees, at least 50 filing out of a just landed transport. They returned fire. Finn moved back behind the wall. He was at a loss of what to do. This wasn’t how it was supposed to end.

He could hear them drawing closer. In a matter of moments, they would be upon him. 

_ I love you, Rose. _

He readied his blaster. He’d go down fighting.

Suddenly, gunfire rained down from above, aiming for the Sith troopers. Finn looked up and couldn’t believe his eyes. A TIE fighter flew low, firing upon the troopers and the transport. And not just any TIE fighter...it was the TIE Whisperer. 

_ Kylo Ren _…

He tore through the troopers; the Whisperer spinning and coming around for another wave of gunfire. The entire transport went up in flames. 

Finn came out from behind the wall. “Whoo! Yeah!” He waved his blaster in the air. The Whisperer came in low, landing in the clearing. Finn immediately ran to it.

Kylo disembarked. Finn didn’t need to be Force-sensitive to feel the rage emanating from the warrior. “Where’s Rey?” he demanded.

Finn pointed North, “She went back to the compound to warn the others.”

“My stormtroopers will be here in a moment with the transports. Gather your friends and get to The Finalizer. Hux knows what to do.” His tone was final and Finn wasn’t about to argue with the man that just saved his life.

There was a noise behind him and Finn turned to see the First Order transport landing. He turned back to Kylo but he had already disappeared in the direction of the compound.

********

The compound shook from the blaster fire pummeling it. Chips of plaster and dust fell from the ceiling as Rey half-carried, half-dragged an injured Resistance fighter. They had been ambushed outside, barely making it inside as Sith stormtroopers came from every direction. 

“Rey!” It was Leia. She ushered Lieutenant Connix to take the injured man. “Rey, what is happening?”

Rey sank to her knees, out of breath. “It’s the Empire. Th-they’re everywhere. I counted at least four Star Destroyers before I ran all the way here to warn you.”

“It’s too late. We’ll never make it to the ships in time.” Leia’s words were filled with hopelessness.

“We have to fight, General. We-we…” Rey searched for the words.

“_ We _ have to distract them while the rest of you escape,” replied Poe, walking up, a bag of weapons slung over his shoulder.

Rey nodded, a pit forming in her stomach. Poe was right. They were going to have to distract the Sith troopers if Leia and the others had any chance at all to survive.

“There’s a secret back exit we have been working on since we got here,” Poe replied, handing a blaster to Connix and another to Leia. “Finn knows where it is. Wait, where is Finn?”

Rey swallowed. “We had to split up. He went to find Rose.”

“But I’m right here,” Rose replied. “Finn is out there, alone?”

Poe placed his hand on her shoulder, “We’ll find him. You get the others to the rendezvous point, like we discussed.” 

Rose nodded, but Rey could feel the other woman’s turmoil at the thought of losing Finn. 

“I’ll find him, Rose. I promise.” Rey grabbed Rose’s hand and squeezed.

“Bring him back to me, Rey,” Rose pleaded.

“I will.” Rey knew it was an empty promise but it was something Rose needed to hear. Tears threatened to suddenly emerge but Rey choked them back. In that moment, she’d give anything to hear Ben’s voice just one last time.

Rey closed her eyes, focusing all her energy on the Force. _ Ben? Ben, if you can hear me, I’m sorry I didn’t trust you _.

“_ Well, we can talk about how you can make it up to me when I’m done saving you and your friends _….” he answered.

Rey’s eyes popped open. “You’re here?!” she spoke aloud.

“Wait - who’s here?” Poe asked but Rey was already running to the front of the compound. She peeked through one of the slats covering the window. 

Several black and white stormtroopers pushed into the courtyard, led by Kylo Ren wielding his red lightsaber. He grabbed a Sith stormtrooper, body slamming him to the ground as he sliced through another. Rey’s heart started to beat wildly in her chest, watching as he fought his way across the courtyard. He was here. He had come to save them… despite how she had treated him.

“What’s going on?” Poe asked, coming to her side.

“It’s the First Order. Th-they’re rescuing us!” Even Rey was surprised at the words coming out of her mouth.

“What?!” Poe exclaimed. He peeked through the slat. He looked at Rey. “Did you know about this?”

“It’s as much a surprise to me as you, Poe.” Rey turned to Leia with a smile, but there was something changed in the old woman’s eyes. She saw a flash of red and in mere seconds, Leia had turned her blaster on Rey and fired. Poe pushed Rey to the ground, taking the hit to his stomach. He crumpled to the ground. Rey looked up at Leia with shock in her eyes but the eyes that stared back at her where not the General’s. 

Leia started to laugh, only it wasn’t her. It was the cackle Rey had heard from Ben’s memories. “Long have I waited…” came the gravelly voice from Leia. But she never finished. There was a blaster shot from behind Leia. The old woman suddenly froze, then fell forward. Connix stood behind her, her blaster in her hand, a look of shock on her face.

Rey scrambled to her feet. Just then, the front entrance burst open. There stood Kylo Ren, backed by several of his stormtroopers, their blasters aimed at the Resistance fighters.

“Lower your weapons,” he ordered his men. “Rey…” he started but she flung herself into his arms, cutting off his words. He was startled, stumbling back a little. He disengaged his lightsaber before encircling her in his embrace. But he pulled back mere seconds later, much to Rey’s chagrin. “Are you injured?”

Rey shook her head. “But Leia and Poe…”

Kylo’s eyes fell on the lifeless body of his mother. Rey could feel his rage instantaneously. “What happened here?” he demanded. 

“She-she tried to shoot me… Poe stepped in the way...It wasn’t her, not really. Her eyes…”

“Palpatine.” Kylo ran his gloved hand over his face, sighing. “It’s the _ mighty _ Skywalker blood… easily manipulated, it would seem.”

“You-you’re a Skywalker…” Rey replied.

“Yes well, I’m also a Solo. And we both know the Solo bloodline is too stubborn to be controlled.”

“She’s not-not dead….”stammered Connix. “I only stunned her.”

Kylo bent down to Leia. He placed his hand on her head, his eyes closing as he sifted through her mind. “We need to get her back to my ship… sedate her before she wakes and shoots anymore of your pilots.”

As if on cue, Poe moaned. Rey was instantly by his side as his eyes fluttered open. “What happened?” he asked. Suddenly he remembered, “Leia….” He tried to rise, but there was a sharp pain in his side and he fell back down.

“We have to get these people out of here,” Rey replied, looking up at Kylo. He was now standing over her and Poe, but his mind was clearly somewhere else, his gaze fixed outside.

“Ben?” Rey asked. She suddenly had a flashback to the Supremacy. Ben had the exact same look in his eyes as he did now, when he stared at the lifeless corpse of Snoke. “B-ben?” she tried again.

He turned to look at her. “Can you fly, pilot?” His question was directed at Poe but his eyes were on Rey.

Poe straightened, “I-I...yes.”

“No,” Rey stated. “He’s hurt.”

“His wound isn’t life threatening. At least it won’t be if we get him back to the Finalizer.” Kylo crouched down next to her, but now his eyes were on Poe. “My TIE fighter isn’t far from here. I need you to get there and provide us cover while we take the injured to the Falcon. Can you do that?”

“Y-yes.”

“Good. Try not to scratch it.” Kylo stood, then offered Poe his hand. Poe hesitated for a moment but took the offer and let Kylo help him to his feet. Rey also stood.

“I can get to the ship faster. I’ll go instead.”

“No. I need you by my side, Rey. If you want these people to survive, please don’t fight me on this.” His tone was final.

“I’ll go with Poe,” Connix replied.

“My stormtroopers will accompany you, as well, to help guarantee safe passage. The one you call Finn is already there.”

“Finn? Finn is ok?” Rose asked.

“He was when I left him. He’s helping rescue as many of the Resistance as he can. Transports are waiting to take everyone to my ship.”

Poe nodded and moved to leave but Kylo stopped him with a firm hand on his elbow, “I can only give you 10 minutes. Any longer and none of us will be leaving here...alive anyway.”

“Understood. 10 minutes...I’ll clear the way.” 

Kylo released him.

Poe, Connix and the stormtroopers quickly hurried out.

Kylo turned to Rose, “I need every able bodied person to help with the injured.”

“Got it!” And Rose turned away from him, immediately relaying his instructions.

Rey approached Kylo. She swallowed, “How did you know…?” 

Kylo didn’t answer, instead he was busying himself collecting the weapons.

“Ben, how-how did you get here so fast?” Her voice shook, tears threatening to emerge. Something about him always made her emotional. She never cried on Jakku...even when she was a child. But he always seemed to bring it out in her. 

He paused in what he was doing. He didn’t look at her as he replied, “Rey, I never left.”

“I don’t understand.”

“After you departed my ship, I took the TIE Whisperer and followed you. I’ve been here for the last three days. I knew it was only a matter of time before Palpatine came for Leia.”

He turned to her, crossing his arms over his broad chest, meeting her gaze, “I get why you don’t trust me, but I wasn’t about to just let you and my mother be killed. So if you’re angry at me, save your lectures for when we are safe on my ship.”

Rey approached him, closing the distance between them. “Ben…” she murmured. And then she did something that surprised him. Hell, it surprised herself. She pushed herself up on her tiptoes, wrapping her hand around the nape of his neck to pull him down towards her. She pressed her lips to his, if only for a moment.

His lips were unyielding like stone, but so warm and soft. She craved to make real contact but had no clue where or how to even begin. This was, afterall, her first kiss.

He didn’t try to pull free but he didn’t budge from his protective stance either. She looked up into his deep brown eyes, her breath mingling with his as their lips hovered so close to one another.

“Why did you do _ that _?” he questioned. His tone was more curious than demanding.

“It was a kiss, Ben…” Rey replied, her ego bruising. 

“I know what it was, Rey. I asked _ why _.” 

She shrugged, suddenly feeling more than a little embarrassed. “Because I wanted to…” Her hands came from around his neck to return to her sides as she lowered herself to the ground. She swallowed, her vision casting downwards, “Sorry if it wasn’t up to your standards. It was my first.”

He gripped her chin between his gloved thumb and forefinger, tilting her to look up at him. His eyes searched hers. She could feel him in her mind, stroking against her thoughts. She didn’t even try to push him away.

And then his arms were around her, encircling her waist, pulling her body flush against his. His mouth crushed against hers, hard and bruising. She didn’t resist, letting her body melt against him. Her hands clutched desperately at his tunic, his kisses so hot and fevered. She lost herself in the moment as she eagerly gave herself over to his desire. 

_ Their desire _...

He slowed down, his kisses now lingering against her lips. Her hands drifted into his hair, pulling him closer. She wanted him closer..._ needed _ him to be closer. She felt like she was burning from the inside out and only he could quench this fire.

His hand cupped her cheek, his thumb coaxing her mouth to open. And when she followed his lead, his tongue thrust between her lips, clashing with her own. She moaned at the invasion. He was devouring her and her body wanted so much more; a wetness already pooling between her thighs. She’s wanted this since the first time he took off his mask in the interrogation room so long ago. Her, his prisoner; he, a beautiful fallen angel with those full lips begging for her devotion.

He lifted her against him and she swore she could hear him growl deep in his chest. But his lips would not relent; claiming her own over and over. And she never wanted it to end.

“Ahem.” Rose cleared her throat.

Both Rey and Kylo paused at the same moment, slowly pulling apart. In unison, they turned and looked at the small mechanic.

“Everyone is ready… your Supreme Leader-ness,” she replied, a blush staining her cheeks.

Kylo slowly lowered Rey to the ground and she immediately took a step away from him. Afraid if she didn’t, she’d throw herself back into his arms.

“Right. Good,” he stammered, running his hand through his hair, showing his nervousness. “What is your name?”

“Rose. Rose Tico.”

“Rose? Were you the one who bit General Hux?”

“Yes, that would be me.”

Kylo gave her a small smile. “I think I like you, Rose.” He gave Rey a longing look then, before turning away from them to go to the front of the compound.

Rey pressed her fist against her mouth to hide her smile and her now swollen lips, her eyes never leaving him.

Rose nudged her, “Holy hell, Rey. That is a _ man _… But don’t tell Finn I said that.”

Rey chuckled, “As long as you don’t tell Finn and Poe what you just saw…”

“Deal.”

Both women sighed as they stared at Kylo Ren.

*********

“We cannot wait any longer for your pilot friend. We have to go now,” Kylo instructed, cautiously peering out into the courtyard of the compound.

He looked at Rey. _ Ready _? He whispered in her mind.

She ignited her lightsaber, the blue crackling causing him to flinch. He turned back to the exit, briefly wondering how in the hell he had gotten himself involved with this mess.

“_ It’s your fault, really. You’re too obsessed with me _…” Rey replied.

He looked at her again, cocking an eyebrow. But she only answered with a knowing smile. _ Damn it, she was right _.

He sighed, igniting his own lightsaber. Then he exited the building, the Resistance fighters trailing him with Rey pulling up the rear. He hadn’t wanted her so far from him, but she had insisted and he wasn’t in the mood to fight her on it. After that kiss they shared earlier, all he was in the mood for was getting her back to his ship and fucking her for the next 100 days. 

But first, they would need to survive. And for that to happen, he needed to forget about Rey...about that kiss...about how saving the damn Resistance was going to make him look weak in the eyes of Hux and the rest of the First Order. He needed to be here, in this very moment, the trained killer that made the mighty Kylo Ren one to be feared….

He needed his mask. He had left it back in his TIE fighter.

Fuck, he was screwed.

He closed his eyes, letting the Force be his guide. He could sense the Falcon not too far ahead. But it was being ambushed; Chewbacca and a droid defending it with everything they had.

_ Rey _ … _ the Falcon is compromised. We are going to need a diversion _.

“_ Poe will come through _…”

_ It needs to happen now. We cannot wait for your pilot _.

“_ Stop calling him ‘my pilot’. We are just friends. _”

He sighed inwardly, _ I meant ‘your’ as in the Resistance _ . _ But I’m starting to question this ‘just friends’ mantra as much as you seem to protest it _.

He could literally feel her eye roll. “_ What do you suggest then _?”

_ I suggest you stop thinking about this Poe Dameron _…

“_ I meant about the diversion _!” she practically yelled in his mind.

Oh, right. _ I have an idea _ . _ But you’re not going to like it _.

******

Chewbacca was on the ground, his hands behind his head, as a red Sith stormtrooper stood over him, blaster at the ready. BB-8 was being held by 2 other troopers; his beeps and whistles irritated and alarmed. Chewy roared. The stormtrooper kicked him, “Keep your mouth shut.” 

Another stormtrooper exited the Falcon. “No one but the Wookie and the droid.”

“So what should we do with them?” asked the first one.

“You heard General Pryde. No quarter. No prisoners.”

“That isn’t always the best plan. Trust me.” Kylo Ren replied.

He had surprised them. All four turned their weapons on him. Chewy roared again, his anger very evident at seeing Kylo.

Kylo lifted one arm in surrender. “I wouldn’t do that, if I were you.”

One of the troopers snorted his disdain, “Why? Because your Kylo Ren? Yes, we know who you are.”

“Then you know what I’m capable of,” he replied. He made a quick movement with his hand and one of the troopers holding BB-8 slammed into the side of the Falcon, knocking him unconscious. BB-8 fell to the ground.

The remaining three readied their blasters, prepared to fire. “I have a gift for your General,” Kylo quickly said.

And before they could say anything, he pulled Rey from behind him and thrust her to the ground. Her hands were bound and she had a gag in her mouth. “This is the last Jedi.”

The three looked at one another and then back at Kylo. “Why would we believe you?” one questioned. “Look at her. She’s a scrap of a girl.”

“Why would I lie?” he shrugged. “I could kill all 3 of you easily enough.”

One snorted, “Oh yeah? Then do it.” The other two turned and looked at him.

“I need that ship and safe passage off this cursed planet. For that, I’m willing to give you the girl. But if you don’t want her…” He grabbed Rey and hauled her to her feet.

“Wait.” One of the troopers stepped forward. “The girl for the ship?”

He nodded, “And safe passage.”

The trooper looked at his comrades then back at Kylo Ren, “That seems fair.”

Chewie roared loudly, distracting the troopers for only a moment. It was all Kylo needed. He ignited his lightsaber, slicing through the back of the first one. The other two turned to face him. He ran one through immediately while grabbing the last with the Force and slamming him to the ground.

He turned to Rey with a smile, but it faded as Chewie grabbed hold of him from behind and tossed him against the Falcon. He bounced off the side, hitting the ground hard.

“Chewie, wait!” Rey yelled. But he wasn’t listening. Kylo was pulling himself to his feet just as Chewie charged, ramming him back into the steel of the Falcon. Kylo punched at the Wookie but it was no use. Chewie was out for revenge.

“BB-8, quickly. Untie me.” The droid cut Rey’s binds, and she turned in time to see Kylo grab Chewie with the Force, choking him. Rey channeled all her energy and tried to force a wedge between the two with her mind. But Kylo’s rage had taken over and he was far too strong for her. So she did the only thing she could think of given a moment’s notice. She grabbed a rock and, aiming for Kylo’s head, she threw it at him. It smacked him in the back of the scalp, breaking his concentration. He dropped Chewie.

“Ow!” Kylo turned to look at her, his hand immediately covering the place where she hit him. “Did you just hit me with a rock?!”

“It worked, didn’t it?”

Kylo huffed, his arms crossing over his chest as he moved away from the Wookie.

Chewie whined and roared at her. 

“No, he’s helping us,” she argued with him.

Chewie roared again; then turned and growled at Kylo.

Kylo leaned against the Falcon for support as he pressed his gloved hand against his ribs, cringing when he found the break. “Stop trying to reason with him. He’s a stupid pet,” he ground out.

“You’re not helping!” Rey exclaimed.

Rose and the others suddenly came out of hiding, blasters drawn. They lowered them as soon as they saw there wasn’t a threat.

“Get the injured on the ship,” Kylo ordered. “We need to get off this rock before Hux makes the jump to lightspeed.”

“Wait. What?” Rey asked.

“He has instructions to jump to lightspeed. It's the one thing we have on the Empire. Our ships are faster and lighter. They won’t be able to follow.”

“Unless they also figured out how to track ships during lightspeed,” Rose offered.

“Let's hope they didn’t,” Kylo replied. He was still holding his ribs, which didn’t go unnoticed by Rey.

Rey was instantly by his side, “Are you ok?” She tried to pull at his tunic to inspect him but he shied away.

“I’ll be fine.” He walked to the ramp leading to the Falcon, hesitating. The memories, painful and obtuse, suddenly threatened to overwhelm him.

It was Rose who came by his side this time, “You all right?”

“I really wish you people would stop asking me that,” came his surly response. 

Chewie roared behind him. He turned to look at him. That’s when he saw it. A shot from a blaster, coming towards them. He Force-froze it just before it hit Chewbacca. But several more followed in rapid succession. Rey took cover by the front of the Falcon while Kylo Force-pushed Rose and Chewie into the safety of the ship. He took a shot to his thigh, but he barely noticed. He was focused on Rey, now under fire from the Sith stormtroopers coming at them. 

He leapt off the ramp, crouching beside it. He took a deep breath, met Rey’s gaze from afar, and ignited his lightsaber.

_ Get ready _.

She ignited her own lightsaber.

He stood, turning to face the stormtroopers. He deflected their blaster shots with his saber, using his free hand to toss them right and left with the Force. It gave Rey just enough time to run for the ramp door. She grabbed a hold of him, pulling him in with her as she closed the hangar door. 

They both fell to the floor in a heap, with Kylo landing on top of Rey. He didn’t hesitate, quickly scrambling to his feet. “You should have left me,” he said off-handedly.

“You’re welcome,” she replied sarcastically but he was already moving away from her. She could see a trail of blood following him in his wake.

He scrambled into the pilot’s seat. Chewie roared at him from the co-pilot’s chair. “Now is not the time, fleabag,” he said.

He started flipping switches, muscle memory taking over from those long ago days when he flew with Han and Chewie. Before they had sent him off to live with Luke…Before _ everything _...

He shook his head, chasing the thoughts away. Now was not the time. 

He felt Rey’s approach even before she laid a hand on his shoulder. “I’ve got this, Rey. Tend to the injured.”

_ Ben _… she called to him in his mind. He cringed at the name. She really must stop calling him that.

“I’m no good with people, Rey. Please just do this.” He glanced at her over his shoulder, “Please.”

She swallowed then nodded. She backed away. 

He proceeded through the pre-flight checklist. Chewie whimpered then roared at him. He ignored him so Chewie tried to grab one of the controls. He grabbed it first, giving Chewbacca a _ look _, “I know!” He took a deep breath, “I know…” he whispered to himself.

He pushed the accelerator and the Falcon roared to life. They eased her through the clearing and broke through the treetops. Suddenly, they were hit with blaster fire from almost every direction. The Empire’s own TIE fighters had decided to join the fight now. 

Kylo cursed under his breath. “Rey, we need you.”

She was there in an instant. He pulled himself out of the pilot’s seat. “You fly.” He gave her no time to argue. He was already moving to the gunnery. He stepped around the scared and injured Resistance fighters. His gaze landed on Leia, still unconscious. He turned away and quickly dropped himself into the gunnery.

Now this he liked. He started firing at the TIE fighters while Rey and Chewie pushed their way through the skyline. 

“Rey? Come in, Rey.” It was Finn.

“Finn! Are you alright? Where are you?” 

“I helped evacuate the people to The Finalizer. I’ve managed to persuade the friendly General here to wait for you.” The way he said it, Kylo was certain he was holding Hux at gunpoint.

Kylo grabbed a communication headset hanging nearby, flipping it on. “Don’t wait for us. Tell Hux to get out of there!”

“What?!” exclaimed Rey.

“You heard me!” Kylo kept firing, but with every TIE he took out, two more seemed to take its place.

“Rey...uh...what should I do?” Finn asked, uncertain.

Rey didn’t respond. Kylo could feel the battle within her. She didn’t want to make the hard decision. So he would do it for her.

“Rey, they have a chance to survive. We have to let them try.”

“Since when are you willing to sacrifice your life for the Resistance?” She questioned.

“Oh I have no intention of dying today, Rey. You know me better than that.” He shot three more TIE fighters.

“All right, Finn. You heard the Supreme Leader.”

Kylo could hear the reluctance in her voice. It made him doubt his decision. He never doubted his decisions. _ What the hell was she doing to him _?

The radio crackled. “Maybe I can help,” came a familiar voice.

“Poe!” Rey and Finn exclaimed.

Kylo cringed. Of course he shows up now.

The TIE Whisperer came careening out of the clouds, blasting the Empire’s TIE fighters out of the sky.

“Nice of you to show up, flyboy.”

“Well I do like to make an entrance. You’ll get used to it.”

Kylo balked. He’d never get used to that man.

“I need you to clear a path, Poe. They are coming at us from all directions.” Rey instructed.

“You got it, sunshine.”

Kylo never felt more like an adolescent than in that moment, rolling his eyes at the sugar coated banter. How would the cocky pilot feel knowing only a short while ago he had his tongue halfway down Rey’s throat? That would most assuredly wipe that smile off his face.

“Finn, get ready to open the dock doors.” Rey continued.

“And tell Hux to prepare for light speed,” Kylo interjected.

“You got it.” Finn replied.

“Rose, get those injured buckled down. This is going to be bumpy!” Rey called out.

She accelerated the Falcon, as both Poe and Kylo took out the TIE fighters in their path. They broke through the orbit of the planet in time to see 2 more Star Destroyers enter space. 

Rey dove under one, dramatically flipping the Falcon on its side to escape by the second.

The Finalizer came into view. 

“Now, Finn!”

The hanger opened. Rey didn’t brake. The Millennium Falcon careened into the docking bay; the TIE Whisperer right behind her.

It skidded through the hanger; smashing into an outer wall as Rey now applied the brakes.

“Close the door, Finn!” Rey yelled into the comm. The door immediately started to close.

Kylo didn’t hesitate. “Hux, light speed!”

Everyone was jolted back as The Finalizer suddenly entered light speed. And they were gone; shooting off to some unknown destination.

Kylo climbed out of the gunnery. Rose was pulling herself to her feet, her head bleeding. He grabbed a hold of her arm, offering his support. “You all right?”

“I think so…” she replied. “Just banged my head a little…”

“You should go to the medical bay; have it looked at.”

She pointed to his leg, “So should you.”

He offered her a small smirk, “It's just a scratch.”

And she smiled at him. It was strange - having someone he had just met actually smile at him; like he was a real person worthy of a smile.

Rey came running into the back, “Is everyone ok?” She looked at Kylo, holding Rose, and an emotion suddenly filled her. It was so strong and hit Kylo with such force that he stumbled. Their eyes met and Kylo had no choice but to turn away quickly.

This new feeling...he didn’t know how to handle it. He had never experienced it before and thought maybe she was just confused, blinded by the adrenaline rush of almost dying. 

_ Yes _ , he convinced himself, _ surely what she was projecting was just a side effect of today’s events. It would fade _.

She was finally with him on The Finalizer. But he couldn’t find any joy in it. Because soon she’d see him for what he really was and forget all about their near death experience and how, in this moment, she fancied herself in love with him.


	5. Welcome to the First Order

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Resistance discovers getting rescued by the First Order has its drawbacks.

Kylo quickly exited the Falcon. He needed to make his way to the bridge and go over everything with Hux. His leg was now numb from the blood loss and his broken ribs made it painful to breathe, but there was too much to do with a ship full of Resistance fighters, that a trip to the med bay would definitely have to wait. After all, he was still Supreme Leader of the First Order.

They would need to meet up with the rest of their fleet, plot their next moves against the Empire, find beds for the Resistance fighters. There was so much needing his attention and yet…

All he could think about was putting enough distance between him and Rey. 

He’d laugh at the irony if he had a sense of humor. He had spent many hours dreaming of her joining him on The Finalizer, and now that she was here, he simply wanted to run and hide. He, Kylo Ren, was afraid of a girl… all because she was clinging to a false notion of  _ love _ . He cringed.

“Ren!” He heard someone call after him. He wanted to ignore it but knew it wouldn’t be wise. He stopped, letting Poe Dameron catch up to him.

Poe thrust his helmet into his rib cage. He choked inwardly on his breath but feigned a resilience he wasn’t feeling at the man’s obvious jab. At least Snoke’s abuse was paying off on some accord. He had learned rather quickly not to show pain.

“Nice shooting, Ace,” Poe said.

Kylo wrapped his arm around his helmet as he gave the man the once-over. He could at least take some small satisfaction in seeing how pale the pilot was; his blood loss becoming very obvious from the blaster wound. Perhaps the pilot would die from his injury, after all. 

He pushed the thought away as soon as it appeared. He would have to learn to show cooperation with the Resistance if he expected his men to do the same.

He gritted his teeth. “Yes, well, the damage you did to my TIE is going to be quite costly to repair.”

Poe smiled weakly, “And here I thought you’d be thanking me for saving your ass.”

Kylo closed the distance between them. He was much taller than the pilot and he used it to his advantage, towering over him. “Saving  _ my ass _ ? I think the blood loss is affecting your memory. As I recall, you were late to the party.”

Poe didn’t fall for the intimidation tactic. He met Ren’s eyes. “I wouldn’t have been late, but you forgot to mention your TIE fighter was programmed to  _ you  _ specifically. Took me some extra time to bypass the system and get her off the ground. Now, you wouldn’t have forgotten that small detail on purpose, surely...”

Kylo smirked and folded his arms over his broad chest, “Are you implying I tried to get you killed? Because, rest assured, if I wanted you dead, you would be dead.”

“And yet here I stand.”

Kylo snorted, “Barely. Better get yourself to the medical bay, flyboy. The adults have plans to make.” Kylo turned away from Poe then, eager to make his departure.

But he only got two steps before Poe’s next words stopped him. “Thank you… for saving us.” He made sure to yell it, extra loud.

Kylo cringed, his hand clenching into a fist at his side. “Do not mistake my actions for kindness. I didn’t do it for you.”

“Oh I know exactly why you did it.” Kylo met his gaze over his shoulder and followed it as it fell on Rey, busy organizing the Rebels with help from Finn and Rose.

This time it was Poe who closed the distance. “You might have her and the rest of them fooled, but not me. I’ll make it my personal mission to ensure you don’t come within an arm’s reach of Rey.”

Kylo actually smiled. “Rey’s a big girl. She can make her own decisions. Tell me, does she know?”

Poe gave him a confused look.

“About your plans...with Leia?”

Poe’s eyes grew wide.

Kylo leaned in and whispered, “You of all people should know that I can take whatever I want.” He tapped his finger to his head.

Now the pilot was speechless. Kylo turned and walked out of the hangar.

He was met with General Hux almost immediately.

“Supreme Leader. Good to see you’re still alive.”

Kylo snorted and kept walking, forcing Hux to practically run to keep up with his long, powerful strides. Sometimes it felt good to be tall.

But the more he pushed his body, the more relentless the pain became. 

“Report,” he barked at the ginger. Anything to keep his mind focused.

“As I’m sure you are aware, we suffered heavy losses.” When Kylo didn’t acknowledge the statement, he continued, “But, with over 100 Resistance fighters now onboard, we could replenish our ranks rather quickly.”

Kylo stopped suddenly. He turned and looked at Hux, “What did you say?”

Hux swallowed then drew himself up to his full height, “I said we can replenish our ranks with the Rebel scum.”

Kylo stared at Hux for the space of several heartbeats. He came to stand before his General. “Why Armitage Hux, that is a brilliant plan.”

Hux smiled. “To my recollection, they never agreed to the truce. That means they are indebted to us.”

He was right. They had snubbed his attempt at offering them food and shelter. Now he had been forced to sacrifice his troops and his ships to save them from the Empire. If not for the First Order, the Resistance would be extinguished. This just might save his reputation as Supreme Leader. Not to mention, be the push he needed to anger Rey enough she’d forget her pitiful notion of loving him.

“Why are you helping me?” Kylo eyed him skeptically. The Hux he knew would have used this opportunity to persuade his detractors into usurping him or worse.

Hux pretended to pick some imaginary fuzz from his jacket, keeping his posture nonchalant and his tone relaxed, “You are my Supreme Leader…”

“The truth, Hux,” he snapped. He just didn’t have the energy to play games today.

Hux looked Kylo in the eye, “The Universe is changing, Ren. We must adapt; more forward. And I think you’re the man to lead us there.” He paused. “I’m so certain of it, I’m willing to pledge my loyalty to you. As I’m sure, when the time comes, you will reward my fealty.”

Kylo studied him for a moment, then gave a slight nod of his head. “What you want will be yours.”

“Excellent. Now, let me offer you some advice, Ren. The past leaders of the Empire and the First Order all have one thing in common - a penchant for a short lifespan.” Kylo followed his gaze to the wound in his leg, still bleeding profusely. 

Hux continued, “May I be so bold as to offer the Supreme Leader a suggestion?”

**********

Rey sat there at the conference table, her mouth hanging open in surprise. Did she hear him correctly? She looked to her right. Rose and Finn were equally taken aback. Poe ...Poe was just angry. 

Fresh from the medical bay, Poe insisted on being present for this meeting and Rey was glad for it. He should be their de facto leader now that Leia was out of commission. Rey herself didn’t want the responsibility. Besides, she felt much too close to the situation. 

Her gaze drifted to Kylo Ren. He was standing with his back to the rest of the room, hands clasped in front of him, his vision trained on the window, watching the stars fly by. He had changed into his Supreme Leader robes and his mask was firmly in place. He had not spoken a word during the entire meeting, leaving his General to do the talking.

_ Ben _ ? she tried. 

No answer. She swallowed. She gently tried to touch his mind but there was only an empty void.

Up until this point, she hadn’t spoken to him since they crash landed the Falcon into The Finalizer. He had hurried away while she had busied herself caring for the injured. It hurt a little… how he didn’t stay and help her, but he was injured himself. Judging by his appearance now, his wounds had been cared for and he was back in Supreme Leader mode.

She had expected he would find her later and they would get a chance to talk about...well,  _ everything _ . But he hadn’t sought her out. Hours passed and First Order personnel had escorted the injured to the medical bay, as well as found them all sleeping quarters. She was bunking with Rose, which suited her fine, but she couldn’t help but feel disappointed. Because it was becoming painfully obvious he was avoiding her. 

And then they were summoned to this meeting…

“So, let me make sure I understand you correctly,” Poe started. “You want the Resistance to join the ranks of the First Order to ...wait, I want to get this right...‘work off’ our debt for you rescuing us from Empire. Is that it?”

Hux bristled. “We prefer ‘under employment’ as independent contractors. We will provide you with room and board; and you will let us utilize your individual ‘talents’, so to speak.”

“You expect us to be your indentured slaves!” Poe exclaimed.

“The First Order is not a charity!” Hux answered back.

Poe rose from his chair abruptly, causing it to clatter to the floor. “This is ridiculous. You can drop us off on the nearest planet.” Clutching his abdomen, the stitches so new they pulled at his skin, he started for the door. 

But no one followed.

Poe turned to look at his friends. None of them would meet his gaze.

Rey’s heart twisted but she agreed with what was left unspoken between them: they had no place to go. And The First Order knew it.

Poe sighed. He didn’t even try to hide the look of contempt he threw Kylo Ren’s way as he picked up his chair and sat back down at the table.

Hux smiled triumphantly. “Very good.” He waved at his assistant, who laid papers in front of the team. “Here you will find your assignments. We took special care to evaluate your strengths and place you in departments you would feel most comfortable.”

“The stormtrooper program?! You can’t be serious!” Finn exclaimed, looking down at the paper. “No. Nope. Not happening.”

“If you recall, FN-2187, you were one of the best in your class,” Hux replied, his lips twisting into a brief smirk. “You just lost your way.”

“Finn! My name is Finn. Why can you not remember that?!”

Hux was about to reply with something sarcastic when he suddenly paused. He turned to look at Kylo for a brief moment before turning back. He cleared his throat, “Yes, well,  _ Finn _ , our Supreme Leader has a few ideas he’d like to run by you concerning the program. Ways he’d like you to improve upon it and such. Can I pencil you in for tomorrow afternoon?”

“Uh...y-yeah, I guess so….” Finn stuttered.

Rey looked down at her paper and sighed. It read “mechanics”. She supposed “last Jedi” was too much to ask for. Still, “disappointed” didn’t even cover what she was feeling now. Angry...resentful...hurt ...so many words sprang to mind as she mindlessly stared at the sheet before her.

She chanced a glance at Kylo again. He hadn’t moved; didn’t even flinch. 

_ Something didn’t feel right _ .

“I expect you all must be exhausted after the events of today so we don’t expect you to report to your stations until the morning. All able bodied Rebels are being given their assignments, as we speak, so we would appreciate your compliance with this as an example to the rest. Any questions you may have can be filed in writing with my assistant. You’re dismissed.”

Kylo immediately turned away from the window and made his way to the door. Two stormtroopers followed in his wake.

Rey thought,  _ Here’s my chance _ . She rose to follow him, determined to get him alone and find out what the hell was going on. Where was the man who took hit after hit to save her and her friends only a day ago?

Where was the man who kissed her like he was starved and she his only sustenance?

She got as far as the door before Hux cut her off, standing in her way.

“May I be of assistance?”

“Well, you could move out of my way.” She tried stepping around him but he moved in sync with her. “I’d like to talk to Mr. Supreme Leader, if you don’t mind.”

“Ah. Well he’s awfully busy. I can perhaps get you an appointment sometime in the next week or so.”

Rey’s mouth dropped open. “You can’t be serious.”

Hux was frustrated. “Is that the only phrase you Rebels know?! I am  _ always  _ serious. The Supreme Leader has a lot on his plate at the moment.” He paused, “Tell you what, submit your concerns in writing...you do know how to write?” 

Rey gave him a scathing stare.

“I’ll take your silence as confirmation. Submit your concerns in writing and I will personally discuss them with the Supreme Leader.” And with that, he turned and walked away.

Rey was fuming. Hux was a pompous ass. But worse, Kylo had given him free rein to deal with the Resistance. Angry tears filled her eyes but she blinked them away.

_ Something didn’t feel right _ .

Rose joined her side. “I got mechanics. What did you get?”

Rey turned and looked at Rose, a plan forming in her mind.

“Rose, how would you like to help me solve a mystery?”

Rose smiled, “I’d love to.”

*******

Rey peered around the corner. Just as she suspected, two stormtroopers were guarding an entrance to one of the medical bays.

“Maybe they’re guarding Leia?” Rose offered.

Rey shrugged, “Maybe. But something tells me they aren’t there to keep someone in. They’re keeping everyone else out.”

“You think it’s Kylo Ren?” whispered Rose.

“You saw how Hux was acting. What if he’s done something to Ren? Sedated him so he can steal the Supreme Leader power?”

“You really think so?”

Rey sighed. She didn’t know. But it was better than the alternative of Kylo just being an unfair jerkface to her and her friends.

“Well, there’s only 2 guards. You’d think there would be like 50 if Hux wanted to keep people away,” Rose replied, evaluating the situation.

“I guarantee Hux thinks we are all too stupid to pull anything on a ship briming with members of The First Order.”

“Well, he does have a point,” Rose agreed.

Rey turned and looked at her, “You don’t have to help me, Rose. If I’m wrong and this goes sideways, I’ll take the fall for it. I wouldn’t want you to end up in the Brig or worse…”

“I’m with you, Rey. Hux is an idiot. Any chance I have to point that out, I’m taking it.” She pulled out 2 small tasers. “I modified these to stun. Finn says there is a flaw in the stormtrooper’s armor, just beneath the rib cage. We can easily knock them out if we can get them both to, you know… turn to the side.”

Rey took one of the tasers, tucking it into the sleeve of her tunic. “I’ll think of something. Just follow my lead.”

Rey and Rose calmly started to walk down the hallway, engaging in conversation. Rey stopped in front of the guarded doors. She tried to paste on her best smile, “Maybe you two can settle a wager for us?”

The two guards looked at each other then at the two women.

Rey continued, “I said the Millennium Falcon could make the Kessel Run in 14 parsecs…”

“But I was like no, Rey, that’s insane! It made the Kessel Run in 12 parsecs,” Rose finished, giving a nervous laugh.

The two stormtroopers exchanged a look with each other again. Rey wiggled her hand, letting the taser drop into her palm. She swallowed.

“It actually made the run in 11.5 parsecs,” came an all too familiar deep voice from behind the closed door. “Let them through,” Kylo called out.

The stormtroopers parted, opening the door for the ladies. Rey and Rose quickly went inside.

There stood Kylo Ren, clothed only in a pair of black briefs, standing by the hospital bed. Both his rib cage and thigh were heavily bandaged and he had a needle stuck in his arm, leading to a bag of plasma that hung off to the side of the bed. His hair was disheveled and he looked tired, but otherwise, he seemed ok.

Rose threw her arms around him, “Oh thank goodness, you’re alive!”

Kylo stood there like a rock, completely taken aback by the friendly affection from the small woman. “Ummm...Rose?”

Rose pulled back, “And you’re like mostly naked.” She stepped back, her face flushing.

Rey met Kylo’s gaze. She wasn’t sure what to feel in that moment - gratefulness or anger. She was leaning towards the latter.

“I told Hux you wouldn’t fall for his decoy idea,” Kylo replied, leaning back against his bed, folding his arms against his chest. He stretched his long legs out in front of him, adequately displaying his perfect corded muscles.

There was a strange flutter in Rey’s stomach as she openly stared at him. She swallowed then licked her lips.  _ Why was her mouth suddenly so dry _ ? She cleared her throat, “I-if you needed time to recuperate, why go through all the trouble of having a decoy? No one would have faulted you for needing time to recover.”

Kylo snorted, “The Supreme Leader cannot show weakness.”

Rey was taken aback. “Weakness? You single-handedly battled like a hundred Sith stormtroopers. You’re a lot of things, but weak isn’t one of them. Don’t let Hux fill your head with his idiotic notions of what a ruler should be!”

His face darkened and she knew immediately she had said the wrong thing. He pushed himself away from the bed, approaching her with a fierceness she hadn’t seen in him in over a year.

“Hux does not control me,” he spit at her. “Hux does what he is told.”

“Ummm… maybe I should leave?” Rose interjected.

“Stay.” Both Kylo and Rey spoke at the same time, their eyes never leaving each other.

“O-kay..” Rose replied, stepping back from the pair.

Rey’s ire was provoked now, and she spoke without thinking, “So it was your idea then to make the Resistance ‘ _ earn their keep _ ’? Because it sounded more like Hux’s ideology.”

Kylo smirked, “So that’s what this is about.” He stepped back from her. “Everyone here does their part, Rey. We are not asking anything more of the Resistance than what I would ask of my own people.”

“Seems fair,” Rose offered.

“No, it isn’t  _ fair _ . You came to us with a truce…”

“Which you rejected,” he interrupted.

“You offered to  _ help _ us…”

“Am I not helping you? Did I not just sacrifice my troops and my ships to rescue you? Give you room and board; a place to establish and regroup?”

“And turned us into your personal slaves!”

“Are your friends in chains, Rey? No. They have free rein within The Finalizer, a guaranteed warm bed to sleep in, plenty of food to fill their bellies; for most, it's more than they could ever hope for in their short lives.”

“And there it is - that First Order arrogance.”

“Yes, Rey, I’m arrogant and far superior to you and those you’ve cast your lot with,” he threw at her. 

He turned away from her then, leaning his hands on the bed. “I’m so arrogant and superior that I risked my reputation… my newfound  _ leadership _ , to mount a rescue mission for people who only wish me dead.”

“And that’s what this is really about - you trying to save face as the Supreme Leader. Is your title really more important to you than saving the lives of innocent people?”

He whirled on her, “I didn’t hesitate to risk everything for you and your friends! But if I wasn’t Supreme Leader, you would have died on that planet! So yes, my title is important. And at the end of the day, its all I have.”

“Ben, you know that’s not true.”

“Is this the part where you tell me if I turn, you and the rest of the Rebellion would welcome me with open arms?” He sighed, “Please tell me you’re not that naive, Rey. Because I sure as hell am not.”

“Once they see that you’ve changed… see the man you were always meant to be…”

“I’m exactly the man I was meant to be! This…” he gestured around, “...this is who I am, Rey.”

She wrapped her arms around herself, “You can’t really believe that, Ben.”

He groaned, his palm covering his face. She could feel him tempering his rage. After a minute of silence, he met her eyes, his gaze steadfast. “Tell me something, Rey, do you even like me?”

“What?!” she exclaimed.

“It’s an honest question. Do-you-like-me?” He paused, then added, “Or do you just want me to be whatever imaginary person you have built inside your mind?”

Her heart started to beat wildly in her chest as she instantly conjured an image of Ben Solo or how she had always dreamed he would be, had Snoke never corrupted him.

He sighed, “What would you have me do? Say it.”

“I-I don’t know what you mean.”

“Ah, you do. Go on. Say it.”

She swallowed back her tears.  _ Damn him _ . “I-I…” she stuttered but then clamped her mouth shut.

“ _ Be Ben Solo _ . There. It’s that easy. Now say it.”

She released a shaky breath, “I want you to be Ben Solo.”

“And what if I can’t, Rey? Could you love Kylo Ren?”

He stared at her, waiting for her reply. She was once again back in the throne room. His plea to join him hung thick and heavy in the air; his heart laid bare before her. A tear trickled down her cheek as she closed her eyes, afraid to look at him.

“That’s what I thought.” He turned away from her, again leaning his hands against his bed.

Silence enveloped the room. 

Rose pulled on Rey’s hand. “Rey, maybe we should go…”

Rey knew she was right but she couldn’t help feeling that once she walked out of those doors, she would never be able to take back all that she said. And in that moment, she wanted to take it back.

“Rest assured, I will reign in Hux,” he replied, refusing to turn and face them. “So you have what you came for.”

_ No _ ! Her mind screamed.  _ I came here for you. _

But it was too late. He slammed the barriers closed in his mind. 

Rose tugged on her hand and she relented. She glanced back at him. He had crawled into his bed, lying on his side, his back to her. He hugged himself… an act of self-comforting she knew all too well. It’s how she coped with the utter loneliness she felt every single night.


	6. This Ship Isn't Big Enough for the Two of Us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey is finding it impossible to avoid Kylo Ren, even on a crowded ship almost 3,000 meters long, forcing her to confront her conflicting feelings.

As soon as Rose and Rey entered Engineering it was as if time had come to a stop. What was a blur of activity among the First Order engineers and mechanics moments before, halted, as everyone suddenly turned to stare at them.

Rose leaned in towards Rey, whispering, “Well that's not uncomfortable at all.”

Rey couldn’t agree more with her friend’s sarcasm. But stares and murmurs were starting to follow all the members of the Resistance around the Finalizer. They had only been on board for 2 days and already people were talking. No one, least of all them, knew exactly how to treat the opposing team when they had spent the duration of their lives growing up to hate the other. But they were being asked to find a way to work together for the good of the galaxy. And they would…

_ At least until our debt is paid _, Rey thought bitterly.

A young man, barely in his twenties, walked over to them, clipboard in hand. He was dressed in an Officer’s uniform, his finger pulling at the collar.

“Y-you must be Rose Tico and Rey...of Jakku?” he stammered, reading off the papers on the clipboard. It took all of Rey’s restraint to not roll her eyes.

“That’s us. I’m Rose,” she replied, extending her hand.

The Officer stared at Rose’s offered hand, clearly not sure what to make of it. He was obviously nervous and Rey only needed to glance into his mind to see the reason. He, like so many others on this ship, believed she had murdered Snoke. They were scared of her… yet also admired her, strangely enough. She’d laugh if she didn’t feel so much like crying.

“I am Officer Noland, Head of Engineering. I’ll be your boss ...er...your commander...no, not commander… y-your liaison...yes, liaison.”

“We report to you… got it,” Rose replied. Rose exchanged a _ look _with Rey, eyebrows raising.

“Y-yes… I hope that is alright,” Noland replied. He chanced a glance in Rey’s direction but turned a bright pink when she caught his gaze and readily cast his vision down to his clipboard.

_ Nothing about this was all right _ , she thought. Her mind immediately went to last night’s conversation with Ben...uh, _ Kylo _. (She’d really have to get used to calling him that.) And she absently wondered if he was still in the medical bay this morning.

It was as if the Force read her mind and on cue, she felt Rose nudge her. She looked at her friend, who nodded her head in the direction of the window by the entrance to engineering. 

And there he stood, on the opposite side of the glass, talking to two Generals in the hall. He wasn’t wearing his cape or helmet; choosing only his black tunic and pants, his lightsaber strapped to his side. He looked better than the previous day but she could feel how tired he was through his Force signature. She wondered if he knew she was only a few feet away; albeit just on the other side of the wall. Her heart thumped hard against her chest as she let a tiny tendril of hope creep its way into her mind that he may be coming to see _ her _.

But it was quickly dashed as he turned away and immediately walked in the opposite direction, his Generals struggling to keep up.

Rey sighed and turned to face Noland, who was busy explaining their tasks for the day.

******

“These solar panels are ridiculous!” Rose exclaimed, “...ridiculously amazing!”

Rey rolled out from beneath the twin engines of the TIE Whisperer, looking up at Rose. In the last 3 hours, Rose had praised every aspect of the reinvented TIE fighter, marveling at everything from its advanced technology to the grey and black decorative panels inside the cockpit. Even Rey had to admit it really was a fine piece of equipment.

_ Much like its owner _ … her mind screamed. Rey sighed, pulling herself to stand. Were they really assigned to fix _ his _ TIE fighter? Couldn’t they recommission droids or something? _ Anything _else would be better than this…

She had tried being in the cockpit to adjust the controls and fix the damage from the crash landing, but it felt way too personal. Hell, it smelled like him in there...an earthy sandalwood and spice...exactly how she had imagined Naboo might smell… and it was wrecking her emotions. 

So she tasked Rose with the internals and she was more than happy to just stay underneath and fiddle with the engines. Except Rose, in all her excitement, kept drawing her attention back to the finer details, reminding her over and over that this machine belonged to _ him _and he more than likely helped with its design.

He was, after all, a lot like his father…

Rose hopped out of the cockpit. “This thing literally is programmed to the pilot’s DNA...like the locks to our rooms can only be opened by us. You would have to rip out the internal configuration and try to jerry rig it just to bypass the operating system. And even then…”

“I get it, Rose. First Order technology definitely has its perks.” Rey knew she shouldn’t snap at her friend, but she didn’t get much sleep the night before and it really was a little too much.

Rose’s face fell. “I’m coming on too strong; I get it. I just...I’m just trying to make the best out of this situation.” She seated herself on the steps leading into the cockpit.

Rey came and sat beside her. “I’m sorry. It’s not you. It’s me.” She tried to muster a smile, nudging Rose, “You know, if I was a jealous woman, I’d think you had a little crush on the Supreme Leader.”

Rose turned beat red. “I promise you, I don’t. Truly. I-I love Finn.”

Rey’s heart skipped a beat at the mention of love. Finn and Rose… she was happy for them.

“But Kylo Ren…” Rose continued, “...he saved my life. I’m having trouble seeing him as the monster in the mask we’ve been conditioned to hate.”

Unwanted memories shifted to the forefront of Rey’s mind.

_ You _ are _ a monster _…

_ Yes I am _…

Rey knew all too well about the many conflicting sides of the Supreme Leader. She swallowed, “No one understands more than me, Rose. He saved my life, too. Of course, this was _ after _he jeopardized my life by bringing me to Snoke.”

Rose looked at Rey in surprise. Rey smiled and Rose laughed, “Well, I suppose he isn’t perfect.”

Rey laughed too, “I don’t think any man is.”

Rose giggled, “That is the truth. Did Finn ever tell you how we met?”

“You know, I don’t think he did.”

“I tasered him,” she stated matter-of-factly.

Rey’s mouth dropped open, “No, you didn’t!”

“Oh yes, I did. He was trying to steal an escape pod. I thought he was just being a deserter.”

Rey laughed out loud, imagining her tasering Finn. “You know that scar across Kylo Ren’s face?”

“You did that?!”

Rey nodded. “How I managed to do it still remains a mystery, but yes, that was me.”

They both grew silent for a few moments, ruminating on the information they shared.

Rose finally turned to Rey and said, “Do you think you two will ever speak again?”

Rey opened her mouth to respond then closed it. She had no real answer to that question. “I-I hope so, Rose.”

“Good. Because I saw how he kissed you and that alone is worth fighting for.”

Rey smiled but it quickly faded. “We-we have this strange connection between us. The Force.... even when we don’t want to be near each other; it gives us no choice,” Rey confessed.

“Well, maybe you should trust the Force,” Rose replied.

Rey shrugged, “It’s out of my hands, I think. You were there. I doubt he wants to speak to me right now.”

Rose stood, “Men don’t know what they want. If you want to speak to him, go and talk to him. It’s that simple.”

“Is that what you would do with Finn?”

“Oh me?” she squeaked. “No...never...I’m not that brave.”

“And you think I am?!” Rey laughed.

“You’re a Jedi. Bravery is in your blood.”

Rey scooted off the step, grabbing a wrench as she made her way back to the engine. “If you were asking me to go and fight him, not a problem. But have a conversation - um, no.”

They both laughed as they resumed their work.

Rey slid back under the TIE, her head filled with thoughts of possible conversation starters. She wasn’t good at talking to people, not really. She’d spent most of her life alone; her days and nights with only herself for conversation. The only time she found it easy was with Finn and Ben….._ Kylo _! 

Oh yeah, she would really get things going in the right direction calling him Ben. _ That always seemed to please him _, she thought sarcastically. 

She began wrenching a coupling, pushing all thoughts of the Supreme Leader from her head. But it was all in vain. Rose had planted a seed in her mind, and try as she might, she couldn’t get her mind off of it. 

An hour later, she had fully convinced herself to try to speak with him. And now her stomach was doing that crazy fluttering it always did when she was nervous. But she wouldn’t seek him out. No...she’d just simply wait for their paths to cross, then she would do it. Yep, as soon as she saw him again, she was going to march right up to him and say….

A loud roar shook her from her reverie.

“Chewie!” she exclaimed.

Rey took off in the direction of the sound, rounding a sharp corner in time to see Chewbacca, bowcaster in hand, threatening three stormtroopers and two engineers by the belly of the Millennium Falcon.

Rage filled Rey in that moment. She’d be damned if these First Order idiots would harm even one hair on Chewie’s head. She grabbed her lightsaber from her belt but only managed to take one step before she stopped herself, ducking behind a bench to stay out of sight.

“What is going on here?” Kylo Ren questioned, suddenly joining the fray. 

Chewie roared again then whimpered. Kylo listened then turned to his people, “Lower your weapons.”

They immediately did as he commanded. Noland approached with caution. He cleared his throat, “T-the Wookie is refusing to cooperate, sir. He won’t let anyone touch his ship a-and he’s demanding parts be made available t-to fix it ...”

“_ The Wookie _ can have what he pleases,” Kylo replied. He turned and looked at Chewie. Chewie whimpered at him. 

“Y-yes sir. Of course, Supreme Leader.” Noland snapped his fingers at the others. “Whatever the Wookie wants, you make sure he gets.”

The First Order engineers scurried off. The stormtroopers dispersed.

Rey stood from behind her hiding place, fully aware her mouth was hanging open in surprise. She watched as Chewie ruffled Kylo Ren’s hair before returning inside the Falcon.

She swallowed, thinking, _ Okay, Rey, here’s your chance _.

Kylo took one last longing look at the Falcon, then turned away, directly facing Rey’s direction.

Rey immediately ducked behind the bench again. She swallowed nervously. She felt so stupid, hiding from him. But hiding was so much easier than facing him right now. 

She took a quick peek and her heart started beating violently in her chest. He was coming towards her.

She cursed beneath her breath. She closed her eyes and counted to ten. When she opened them and again peeked around the corner, Kylo Ren was gone.

She wasn’t sure if she was more disappointed or relieved. But she feared it was the first rather than the latter.

******

Rose and Rey entered the chaotic mess hall during their break for lunch.

“There’s Finn,” Rose exclaimed, bouncing off in his direction. 

Rey quickly scanned the large lunch room but thankfully, there was no Kylo Ren in sight. Not that she thought he’d dine with his people. He was a solitary man; probably took his meals alone in his room. 

She sighed in relief; choosing to ignore the pang in her heart. She’d already seen him twice today. For a ship almost 3,000 meters long, that was quite the coincidence their paths crossed even that much in the span of four hours.

Rey grabbed a tray, entering the food line. It was quite crowded in here; she supposed it was lunchtime for all the departments. A petite woman with chestnut brown hair, dressed in a First Order uniform, stood in front of her. She turned and smiled at Rey. She smiled back. She waited as the line moved slowly. The woman kept turning around and briefly looking at her. It was slightly uncomfortable. 

Finally, she turned to face Rey and spoke, “Are you really a Jedi?”

“I ...um…” Rey stammered. 

She didn’t wait for Rey to answer. “Is it true you trained with Luke Skywalker? He also trained the Supreme Leader but you probably already know that, since the two of you are...you know…” 

_ No, she did not know _. “The two of us are what?”

The woman leaned in, “You know..._ together… _”

Rey sputtered, her mouth agape. “We most certainly are not..._ together _.”

The woman’s eyes grew wide. “Oh! Sorry...I didn’t mean to imply anything. It’s just… I mean, everyone is saying it. After all, he _ personally _rescued you…”

“He rescued a lot of people...not just me. And it was really a joint effort.” Why did Rey feel she needed to explain herself to this person?!

“So is that whole thing about you being the last Jedi not true either?”

Rey opened her mouth to say something rude but was thankfully cut off.

“Rey, here, is one of the best Jedi the galaxy has ever seen. Maybe you should think about that the next time you want to pepper her with questions, Caroline,” Poe replied, his tone snarky.

Caroline slightly turned her nose up at him, “I was only curious, Dameron.” She then abandoned her tray and left in a huff.

Poe slid into her place in line, “Don’t mind her, Rey, she’s one of Hux’s girls from the Bridge.”

Rey sighed, “Hux. Of course. Explains the rumors.”

“What exactly did she say to you?” he inquired.

Panic alarms rang in Rey’s head at his question. “Oh nothing… really. Just about me being a Jedi.”

“And Kylo Ren’s lover?”

Rey dropped her tray. It clattered hard against the floor. The whole room seemed to grow quiet as everyone turned to stare. Rey quickly picked up her tray.

“What?!” she demanded, but keeping her voice barely above a whisper. 

“Oh yeah. It’s been quite the topic amongst First Order personnel. They think you two are…”

“I’ve heard enough,” she interrupted. She squeezed her eyes shut in an effort to beat down the rage threatening to boil over. 

Poe placed a reassuring hand on her bicep, “Hey Rey, don’t get upset. We have your back.” He caressed her lightly, making her jump. He pulled his hand away immediately. He crossed his arms over his chest, “Like you would ever have romantic feelings for the likes of him…”

Rey felt sick. She didn’t like being the topic of anyone’s discussion; let alone have her personal life under scrutiny by Hux and even her friends in the Resistance. How she felt about Kylo Ren...or anyone for that matter… was her own business, plain and simple. 

She swallowed. Had Kylo also heard what people were saying? By the Force, he would be furious, for sure.

“You okay, Rey? You don’t look so well,” Poe replied.

“Yeah, just need to eat, I guess,” Rey lied.

“Well we have a table over there. Come join us when you’ve grabbed your food.” Poe sauntered off.

Rey grabbed a few pieces of fresh fruit, her appetite suddenly gone. Still, she needed to eat to keep her energy up and she rarely saw a better display of fresh produce. _ The First Order at its finest _, she thought. She hurried to join Poe’s table. 

“Rey!” Finn cheered, an apple clamped firmly between his teeth. He looked happy. 

When she tried to sit, Poe immediately shot to his feet, grabbing and pulling out a chair for her. She paused, uncertain of what to do. What was up with Poe lately?

Cautiously, she sat down in his offered chair. No one else seemed to think it was out of the ordinary, choosing instead to carry on with their conversations, mostly about how their first days were going in their new assignments.

Poe moved to settle down in his own seat beside Rey. He gave her one of his patented grins as he lowered himself to his chair. But with a hard bang, Poe hit the floor, his chair suddenly pulling out from under him.

The whole table laughed, even Poe, as he sheepishly climbed to his feet and grabbed his chair to sit down. But Rey didn’t laugh. It was as if an unseen force had moved that chair.

She stood, scanning the crowded area. A flash of black by the exit grabbed her attention and she ran after it. But as she exited the mess hall, the hallway was completely deserted. No Kylo Ren in sight.

Maybe she had imagined it. She shook her head. No. She had _ felt _him, only for a brief moment, but it was definitely him.

She returned to her table, her mind churning. She absently grabbed a piece of fruit, delicately chewing it as she pondered what had just happened.

Finn leaned over to her, whispering, “I have a meeting with your boyfriend after lunch. Any pointers on how to best deal with him?”

“He’s not my boyfriend,” she bit out.

“Oh, I know that. I was just messing with you. Rey, are you ok? You seem rattled.”

Rey sighed, “Apparently the entire First Order thinks their Supreme Leader and I are...are…” She couldn’t even finish.

Finn laughed, “Rey, they are just rumors. I already squashed it among the stormtroopers. Besides, why do you care?”

_ Why did she care _ ? Because she knew _ he _would. It would be seen as another weakness against his role of Supreme Leader. Maybe talking to him wasn’t such a good idea. Keeping one’s distance suddenly seemed like the best plan of action.

*****

Rey rotated the paper in her hands. She scanned it then looked up at the system of halls and corridors in front of her. _ Holy hell, how was she not to get lost in this place _?!

She turned the paper again. Yep, it still made no sense. She looked behind her then in front again. Nope. She had no idea if she got herself turned around or not.

She sighed. She should have let Rose make the trip to the archives. They needed the schematics for the Whisperer and she had readily volunteered, if anything just to get out of the stifling shop. The Finalizer may be huge, but it had this way of making Rey feel claustrophobic. She was used to living on planets, the sand or grass at her feet. Now she only had cold, hard steel to surround her. She had literally locked herself in a box and somehow lost the key. 

_ And it’s only your first full day _… she chided herself.

She decided she needed a less conventional way to find her way around this ship. She closed her eyes, letting the Force surround her. She pictured in her mind’s eye what she wanted; hoping the Force would be her guide. When she opened them, she felt pulled to the left; her instincts suddenly driving her directional decision making.

After a series of twists and turns, she found herself at a door much different from all the others, at the end of a deserted hallway. It didn’t have the palm scan but required a key code to enter. Seemed strange that the archives would be on lock down but maybe the First Order didn’t want the Resistance trying to access their data files.

There was a symbol etched into the door. It was familiar to her but she couldn’t place it. It had a six-sided shape with an arrow extending from each side. It was all encased within another six-sided shape, broken at the seams. It looked almost like a trapped sun. 

She ran the tips of her fingers over it. A jolt of blue electricity shocked her, knocking her back. She lost her footing and fell on her backside. She didn’t hesitate, scrambling to stand. The entire door seemed to glow with the same energy. She cautiously held her hand out, pulling on the Force. The blue electricity hummed. She guided her hand to move in various patterns. The blue light moved with her; weaving and etching its way across the door similar to how she had seen sand worms move through the granules on Jakku. A security system, perhaps?

At this point she was sure this wasn’t the archives. But the Force led her here for a reason. She studied the door, keeping her distance so as not to set off any more traps. The key code panel was dusty. It also wasn’t numbered. Instead it had strange symbols; letters from a language she didn’t know. She let her fingers hover over it, willing the Force to show her the way to access it. The letters began to swirl, morphing into readable text. Of their own accord, the buttons started to press; forming a pattern.

“_ Let the hate flow through you _…”

Rey ripped her hand away. That voice… so cold and cruel.

“_ I can feel your anger. It gives you focus, makes you stronger _…”

She could hear a child’s screams, “_ Come back! Come back _…” They were her screams.

Rey stepped back from the door. There was a flash of movement to her left. She whirled around in time to see someone disappear down the corridor. She took off after them.

She rounded the corner to be greeted by nothing. There were no signs of life. The ship was eerily quiet.

“_ Your faith in your friends is your weakness _…” the crackling voice screamed inside her mind. She fell to her knees, grabbing her head with both her hands as pain seared through her.

The voice only grew louder. “_ Choose someone hungrier and you will be devoured. _

_ Choose someone quicker and you won’t dodge the blade at your back. _

_ Choose someone with more patience and you won’t block the blade at your throat. _

_ Choose someone more devious and you’ll hold the blade that kills you. _

_ Choose someone more clever and you’ll never know your end _.”

It was chanting in her mind.

“_ The blade.. The blade… The blade...theblade..theblade...theblade _…”

“_ Your coming together will be your undoing _…”

Rey curled herself into a tight ball, squeezing her eyes shut, desperately trying to push the voice out of her mind. That laughter, merciless, rang throughout her skull.

Someone stepped in front of her. The sound of his boots hitting the steel floor of the Finalizer was enough to chase the voice away. Still she refused to open her eyes.

He crouched before her. “Rey…”

She knew that voice all too well.

One long finger caressed the side of her cheek and her eyes fluttered open. Ben gave her a warm smile before pushing himself to his feet.

“Stand up, Rey.” He reached out his ungloved hand to her.

He was here -- Ben Solo. Her beautiful Ben….

She took his hand. He effortlessly pulled her to her feet. She stared up at him, mesmerized by his appearance. He looked so young...gone were the troubles that plagued him now. His eyes were so bright, so full of light and love…

He was still holding her hand. He dragged her close; their bodies so close to touching. His mouth lowered to hers; his breath warm against her lips. Still, he did not touch her.

“Rey…” he whispered.

“Ben…” she responded in measure.

“Your heart breaks for _ him… _”

Rey pulled back. “What?”

Ben’s smile faded to be replaced by a cold sneer. He wretched her forward, “Now you can _ bleed _ for him…”

Rey felt a strange ache in the pit of her stomach. She looked down and saw Ben had driven a large dagger straight through her belly. She stumbled back. He let her hand go.

“Traitor!” he yelled at her.

Tears filled Rey’s eyes. She yanked the blade from her body and held it up before her. It was large and triangular in shape, with a red and gold hilt. And it was glowing - like the door glowed before - with the same blue electricity. 

She dropped it. 

Ben picked it up, wiping her blood from the shaft onto the arm of his pristine white shirt. He then looked at her with menace. He stalked towards her.

Rey, clutching the wound to her stomach, turned to run. She tripped and fell.

She landed in a puddle of mud. Rey looked up. Rain was pouring from the blackened sky. Something rustled and she turned. Kylo Ren stood there, in the rain, his ignited red lightsaber a beacon in the darkness. He was flanked by five men, all similarly dressed. Rey knew this place; had been here once before - when she touched Anakin’s lightsaber for the first time.

“Ben…” she whispered.

Kylo’s attention snapped to her and he took three hulking strides to her, his lightsaber raising.

******

Rey startled awake, gulping for breath; her heart racing. She instantly pressed her hands to her belly but thankfully, there was no knife wound. She sat up, squinting in the darkness. It was late or early...she found it hard to tell on a ship in space unless she purposely looked at the clock. In that moment, she was just thankful it had all been a bad dream.

She looked to her left. Rose’s bed was empty… as it had been for the whole week. She was with Finn. Rey didn’t begrudge her for it, even if it meant leaving Rey alone, with only the dark to comfort her.

Tears pricked her eyes. She didn’t have the strength to stop them so she simply gave into them. She laid back down, wrapping her arms around herself, turning her face into her pillow and began to weep. Shudders racked through her as she cried and cried; the unbearable loneliness crushing her beneath its weight; the pain from her nightmare still fresh and raw.

She _ felt _him, even before her bed shifted under his weight. He tugged her to him and she didn’t fight it. The Force had brought him here and for once, she wouldn’t question it. She pressed her face into his shirt, breathing in his smell. His arms wrapped around her, cradling her against him. He didn’t speak; he just held her tight, dropping small kisses into her hair as she cried herself back to sleep.

*****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Though Rey and Kylo had minimal interaction in this chapter, the next series of chapters will see them together and the heat will finally start to turn up between them.


	7. Forbidden Fruit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Kylo have a moment...

Rey sat at the table in Engineering, the schematics for the Whisperer laid out before her. Everyone had gone to dinner, including Rose, but Rey didn’t feel much like eating (or socializing, for that matter). Rose would bring her back something...she always did… 

The mechanic had sensed a change in Rey over the last few weeks. But instead of pushing her, she kept quiet, knowing if Rey wanted to talk she would. Rey loved that about Rose. She always knew when it was best to leave Rey to her own devices.

Rey sighed. She pushed the Whisperer specs aside. There was a small piece of paper taped to the table. Rey grabbed a pen and drew another tick mark on the paper.  _ 105 _ …

_ 105  _ times she had seen Kylo Ren in less than a month. 

_ 105  _ times where he ignored her… never spoke to her… pretended she didn’t even exist…

_ 105 _ times which  _ did not _ include the nights when the Force Bond would open and he would lay with her in the dark, comforting her from the nightmares he never asked her to explain.

They always started the same - the nightmares - with her lost aboard The Finalizer. But no matter how hard she tried to escape, Ben Solo always found her… always gutted her with the same dagger. Only then did she find herself at the mercy of Kylo Ren. It was always dark; always raining. Sometimes his Knights would be there; sometimes he was alone. He was frightening; looming large above her; his lightsaber raised almost as if he was going to strike her down. But she always woke before he did.

And then he’d be there, in the flesh, crawling into her bed. He was so warm against her; his large frame gently yet protectively embracing her. Just his presence alone made the darkness recede. She’d quickly fall asleep in his arms; her mind so quiet she no longer dreamed. She wouldn’t wake until her alarm sounded and, by then, he was always gone. The Force pulling him away. Or perhaps he left on his own accord. She tried not to think too hard on the specifics, afraid the answer may be one she did not want to hear.

She slammed her pen down on the table, dragging the schematics to cover her markings. She groaned as she laid her head down on her arms.  _ Why was she always thinking about him _ ?!

She leapt to her feet and grabbed her lightsaber from her belt. She would practice. Yes, practicing would keep her thoughts in check. She certainly wouldn’t think back to their duels or how when their blades connected, it created a beautiful purplish hue that sparkled in the dark depths of his eyes.

_ By the Force, get it together, Rey _ ! she yelled at herself.

She ignited her blade. It crackled and a spark hit the tender flesh of her hand. She bit her lip to keep from crying out. She really needed to fix her lightsaber. Or get a nice pair of gloves.

_ Wait! Was that why Kylo always wore gloves _ ?  _ Those tight, leather gloves stretched over his long fingers. What she’d do to have him skim his leather clad hands down the bare flesh of her _ ….

_ Damn it! She did it again _ ! She shook her head. Then shook her arms, releasing the tension. She jumped in place a few times, feeling herself loosen up.  _ No more thoughts of Kylo Ren _ , she chided herself.  _ Focus on the Force _ .

She swung the blade freely, first to the right, then the left. She loved the sound it made; how connected she felt to the movements. When she fought, whether with her quarterstaff or her lightsaber, she was most successful when she cleared her mind and let instinct take over. The weapon became an extension of her being. It was the most natural feeling in the world.

Rey closed her eyes. She inhaled deeply then released it slowly. She pictured in her mind’s eye an opponent… someone tall and foreboding.  _ Not Kylo Ren _ , she reaffirmed. She opened her eyes. 

With two hands she swung right then left, feinting invisible blows, parrying others. She put all her strength into each swing as if she was fighting for her very life. She twirled her lightsaber above her head while also whipping her body in a 180 degree turn. She sliced rhythmically through the air as she whirled around, imagining herself confronting a foe that was trying to sneak up behind her. 

She came face to face with Kylo Ren. She yelped, her lightsaber coming within a hair’s breadth of his neck. She dropped her lightsaber, letting it clatter to the hard floor at his feet and took three steps back.

He was so calm; just standing there with his hands clasped behind his back and a small smirk on his face. 

“You frightened me!” she exclaimed.

He cocked an eyebrow, “Yes, I have that effect on people.” He bent to retrieve her lightsaber. He turned it over in his gloved hands, examining the break in the shaft she had haphazardly tried to mend. 

She moved towards him, extending her hand, “That’s mine.”

“Is it now?” he questioned. He turned away from her, striding over to the engineering table. 

She followed at his heels. “You can’t just take it, Ben.” She cursed beneath her breath at the use of his formal name. But, surprisingly, he didn’t flinch. 

“It wouldn’t be much fun if I just took it from you, Rey.”

He pulled the stool out from beneath the table, taking a seat. He stripped off his gloves, methodically pulling the tip of each finger loose before sliding his large hands free of the leather. Rey couldn’t help but stare. She released a shaky breath.

He looked at her with concern. Then he pulled a large plum from the pocket of his tunic and threw it to her. She caught it with ease.

“Rose wanted me to give that to you. Said you haven’t been eating.” He returned his attention to the lightsaber. He pulled a few tools from the table’s drawers, laying them out before him.

Rey stared at the piece of fruit, rolling it between the palms of her hands. “You-you spoke to Rose?”

He cocked an eyebrow, “Does anyone ever really speak to Rose? She talks and you listen.”

Rey smiled. “Yes, that sounds about right.” She paused then added, “You like her.”

He stopped what he was doing, but kept his gaze fixed on the lightsaber, “She’s a good person.” He swallowed nervously. Then he resumed working, unscrewing the shaft of the blade.

Rey decided not to press him any further. She knew it must be difficult for him, interacting with the Resistance. She wondered if he had ever even had friends before. 

“No,” he replied.

She was startled, “I didn’t ask you anything.”

He tapped a finger to his forehead, “You’re projecting...rather loudly. And the answer is no, Rey. I’ve never had any friends.” He met her gaze briefly, “I was always  _ different _ , not to mention tall and awkward.” He looked away, adding, “And children don’t like it when you can fling them across the room with only your thoughts.”

She stared at him, her heart twisting in her chest.

“Don’t.”

“I-I…” she stammered.

He looked her in the eye, “Don’t pity me.” He shifted his gaze back to the lightsaber. “Most of them are probably dead now while I am Supreme Leader of the First Order.”

Rey sighed. He really was insufferable at times. Just when she thought she saw a chink in his armor, he again hid behind his ego. 

She pulled herself to sit on top of the table, bending one leg under her and the other dangling over the edge. She saw him glance at her out of the corner of his eye but he said nothing. They were so close now...his left hand occasionally brushing against her thigh as he worked.

“Your powers in the Force have grown if you can hear what people are thinking with minimal effort.”

“I have always been powerful,” he stated matter-of-factly. “I’ve just learned how best to harness it.”

“How-how did you learn?” She hated how small her voice sounded just then.

He looked up at her, meeting her gaze. She reckoned he could feel her desperation in wanting an answer. “I trained; I studied; I sought out the teachings from the most powerful minds in the galaxy.” He resumed his work. “You wouldn’t want the ability, trust me. It’s a curse more than a blessing.”

“How so?”

He sighed. “Hearing people’s random thoughts...it can be... _ unbearable _ . Like your friend, FN-2187, for instance. Whenever we meet, he can’t stop thinking about my cape. It’s really quite disturbing.”

Rey burst out laughing. Kylo gave her a confused look. “I’m not laughing at you, I promise. It’s just that’s so  _ him _ . And his name is Finn.”

“Yes. He constantly reminds Hux of that fact every day. But he never says it to me.”

Kylo returned his attention to the lightsaber, the conversation apparently over for him. Rey sat there, absently thinking about what he said; how he trained. It’s then she remembered the fruit still in her hand.

She took a tentative bite of the plum, the juices squirting into her mouth and coating her lips. It really was the most delicious thing she had ever tasted. She closed her eyes, savoring the moment. She learned rather quickly, growing up on Jakku, to appreciate food, especially since she wasn’t sure when her next meal would be. And those had been tasteless rations. She had her first taste of real fruit with the Resistance; albeit sparingly. It was amazing but still not the caliber of the First Order’s food. No, this plum was simply heavenly. She temporarily forgot she wasn’t alone.

She took another bite, moaning beneath her breath. She opened her eyes and found Kylo staring intently at her, his arms folded across his chest, his work on her saber all but abandoned. 

Embarrassed, she wiped at her chin with the back of her hand, quickly swallowing the piece in her mouth. “Sorry.”

He was looking at her inquisitively. Then there was a flash of  _ something  _ in his eyes… almost primal, heated. But as quickly as it came, it vanished. He looked away, returning to his work, “You make noises when you eat.”

Rey felt her face flush. “Do I? S-sorry. I wasn’t exactly raised with table manners. It-it’s why I prefer to eat alone.”

“Don’t apologize. It’s… nice.”

Rey didn’t think it was possible to blush harder, but her face must have been fifty shades of pink in that moment. And she didn’t even try to hide her cheesy smile. 

He stood suddenly, walking over to the parts she and Rose had been sorting earlier in the day. He crouched down, sifting through the odds and ends. She took the rare moment to study him, the fabric of his tunic and trousers pulled taut over his large muscular thighs and broad shoulders and back. She licked her lips, still tasting the juices of the plum.

Finding what he needed, he returned to the table, but didn’t retake his seat. He stood next to her, measuring the piece of metal against the shaft of her saber. With her seated on the table, she was finally the same height as him. She couldn’t seem to take her eyes off his face. She had always found him so handsome. The scar she had given him only seemed to add to the appeal. Her fingers itched to touch him - to trace the length of his scar where it dipped beneath the collar of his tunic.

“You’re staring,” he said, not meeting her gaze. He was concentrating on the task before him.

_ Uh oh _ . She swallowed, “S-sorry. It’s just that we aren’t usually this close to one another unless there are a pair of lightsabers between us.” She took another bite of the plum, trying to seem so casual.

He snorted, the corners of his mouth turning up just a fraction into a smirk. “You’ve seen me naked, Rey. Or was it so unmemorable that you’ve forgotten?”

Rey choked, sending herself into a fit of coughing.  _ Holy hell, he was right! _

He glanced her way, “You ok there?”

She continued to cough, swallowing deeply. “Fine...fine…” she squeaked. 

When she managed to get herself under control, she looked over at him. He was actually smiling! It made her smile in return.

She looked down at the half eaten plum in her hand, the juices now covering the tips of her fingers. She lifted it to him, “Care for a bite?”

He didn’t acknowledge her, just continued with his work. She couldn’t keep from rolling her eyes. He really was such a snob when he wanted to be. Feeling a little defeated, she started to lower the fruit away from him, but his hand grabbed a hold of her wrist, staying her retreat.

He turned to look at her. Their gazes locked. Her pulse quickened as he brought her hand to his mouth, his teeth sinking into the delectable piece of fruit with such exquisite slowness it sent waves of heat directly to the apex of her thighs. Her body tightened in response and her breathing grew shallow.

He didn’t stop with that one bite. He took the fruit from her hand, tossing it into the trash receptacle by the table. He then pulled her fingers close to his lips. He slid his tongue across each tip, tasting the plum juices, before easing each one into his mouth, gently sucking.

Rey twisted her body where she sat, her position on the table suddenly becoming uncomfortable. She could feel the wetness building between her thighs, and she instinctively squeezed her legs together. The things she wanted him to do to her...with that wicked mouth of his…

He traced his thumb around the edge of her mouth, then brought it to her own lips. She drew it between her teeth, sucking the juices from it. He released a shaky breath, pulling free from her. He carefully laid her hand in her lap, lightly running the pad of his thumb over the back in a gentle caress before taking a step back. He returned his attention to the lightsaber, almost like nothing had even happened.

She bit her lip. This was uncharted territory for her and she really wasn’t sure what to say or do. She wondered if it was the same for him, perhaps that would account for some of his aloofness. 

Her stomach fluttered at the possibility that this wasn’t a first for him - maybe he was the lothario of the First Order, as well as their Supreme Leader. He really was a wonderful kisser and that trick with the plum definitely screamed  _ skillful lover _ . 

_ By the Force, was that why everyone seemed so damn interested in her relationship with him? Was she just the latest in a long line of women _ ?

She chanced a glance at him. His brow was furrowed as he studied the lightsaber. 

She gulped. “Kylo…” she began.

  
  


“It’s only ever been you, Rey. Just you.” 

He couldn’t have surprised her more if he punched her in the face. Rey just stared at him. He was so calm, casually rebuilding her lightsaber as if he hadn’t just revealed an intimate detail to her.

She reached out her hand, placing it on his, stopping his work. He didn’t look at her, just stared at where she touched him. “It’s only ever been you…”

Silence enveloped them. Neither of them moved or spoke for the space of several heartbeats. Then Kylo pulled his hand from beneath hers, resuming his task.

Rey sat back, her arms hugging herself. She continued to watch him, unsure what she should do next. _Did he still want her to say she could try to love him...the Kylo_ _Ren part of himself_? She opened her mouth to speak but he immediately cut her off.

“Close your eyes,” he said.

“Wait...what?” She was confused and a bit uncertain.

“Close your eyes, Rey.” He paused, “Or don’t you trust me?”

She gave him a  _ look _ . She slid off the table to stand next to him. She sighed, closing her eyes, “Okay, my eyes are closed.” She couldn’t help but swallow, trying hard to suppress the memories of being impaled with a dagger every night in her dreams. She could trust him...couldn’t she?

She suddenly felt a shift in the Force… power emanating from him in a large burst.

“Open your eyes,” he commanded.

She did as she was told. He extended his hands to her, her fixed lightsaber resting in his palms. It was a thing of beauty - the crack mended perfectly...almost like it hadn’t ever been split in half by two powerful Force users.

She immediately reached for it but stopped herself. She met his gaze, “May I?”

He smirked, “It’s yours, Rey.”

She smiled, taking the shaft of the blade in her hand.

“For now, anyway…” he finished. He took a step back from her, placing a great amount of distance between them as he pulled his leather gloves back on.

She chose to ignore his comment, instead concentrating on the weight and feel of her lightsaber. She couldn’t explain it, but it felt different… it felt more like  _ her… _ the extension of her power. She ignited it. The blue light roared to life but no sparks showered from the blade now. It truly was perfect. 

All because of  _ him… _

She turned to look at him. He was by his TIE Whisperer, his back to her, seemingly studying the details of his ship.

“Thank you, Kylo.”

He glanced at her over his shoulder, giving a slight nod of acknowledgement. Then he turned back to the TIE, inspecting the work they had done to fix the damage.

Rey focused on her lightsaber. She flipped her wrist, spinning the saber in a criss-coss pattern in front of her body. Then she repeated the movement, now turning her body ninety degrees to the right, slashing and thrusting her blade through the air. It felt good to have her weapon back… even better than it had been before.

She stopped, resting the ignited blade at her side. She looked at Kylo, “Interested in sparring?”

He turned to face her, clasping his hands behind his back, “I don’t think that would be a good idea.”

“Why? Because you know I’ll beat you?” She was teasing him…  _ kind of _ .

Anger flashed in his eyes, but he quickly suppressed it. He cocked an eyebrow, “You beat me  _ one _ time...and I was gravely injured.”

“If that’s what you need to tell yourself to get you through the day…” she replied, shrugging.

“I know what you’re doing, Rey, and it won’t work.”

She sighed, “Fine. It was just a little sparring. I don’t exactly have other Force sensitives to practice with.”

He groaned, his hand running over his face as he considered her words. “Alright. One session.”

Rey responded with a gleeful smile.

He came before her, his face almost wary. He took his stance, slightly bending his knees, his feet shoulder width apart. He ignited his saber, the blood red blade a constant reminder to Rey of the torrent of emotions that rolled between them every time they fought.

_ It’s just sparring _ , she told herself.  _ He’s not trying to kill you _ …

She took a cleansing breath, releasing it slowly. Her blue blade rested at her side. She felt the Force flow through her.

She cautiously stepped to her right. He waited for her to make the first move, his stance tight and controlled.

She went for the attack, her blade raising to slash for his shoulder. He easily blocked it, using his blade to push her back. She tried striking again from the right, then the left. Blow after blow, he defended himself, clearly anticipating every move she was going to make. But he never attempted to strike back. He simply shoved her away from him, waiting to parry her next series of blows.

She lowered her weapon. “You’re not even trying,” she replied.

“Rey, I don’t want to fight you.” He seemed almost pained.

“We’re not fighting, it’s just practice. Please, Kylo.”

He sighed. 

He looked at her for only a moment, then he attacked. He came at her, raining blows down on her. Instinct took over and their blades clashed, red against blue, bathing them in purple light, as she counter-attacked each of his strikes with one of her own. 

He used his height and strength to control her movements, forcing her to retreat until he had her pinned against the TIE fighter, their sabers locking together as she fought to push him off of her.

His blade pressed into hers and she struggled to remain standing. Their gazes met, his dark eyes heated and intense.

Suddenly he was gone and Rey fell into a crouched position, her breathing ragged. She looked up. He had escaped to the other side of the shop, disengaging his saber. He, too, was breathing hard.

She disengaged her own saber and slowly stood. His back was to her, his hands resting on his hips as he worked to catch his breath.

She swallowed, “Kylo…”

“I didn’t want to fight you, Rey.”

She shrugged, “It was just sparring…” She turned away from him. She didn’t even believe her own words. This was how it was between them - hot, raw, fierce...whether they were enemies or lovers, it was always going to be just like this.

She looked down at her lightsaber clutched tightly in her fist. She ignited it, the blue light bright, like a beacon of hope.

She felt him approach from behind. He slid his left hand around her waist while his right settled on her wrist of the hand holding the saber. He pressed his body against hers, encompassing her completely within his embrace. He guided her hand to move the saber, bringing it parallel above her head, then guiding it to strike down in a furious motion, all the while using his hand at her waist to move her body in the same flow of movements.

The entire length of his body moved with her. He was so warm… so very  _ male _ . And she was finding it hard to concentrate on the lightsaber in her hand with him so close. 

“Trust in the Force,” he whispered in her ear, “Feel it flow through you… not only in your hands… feel it with your  _ entire body _ …”

Rey’s heart was racing, the blood pounding so hard in her ears she could barely hear his words. But she could feel them in her mind… in her core. Of their own volition, her hips shifted, pressing back into his own.

He jerked against her, his hand tightening on her waist. “Rey…” he warned. “I am not a gentle man…”

She rotated her hips, fighting against his grip, “Good…” she murmured.

He groaned, his forehead falling to rest on the back of her neck. Her laid a soft kiss on her shoulder, before trailing the tip of his tongue up the length of her neck to settle on her ear lobe. He nipped at the sensitive skin there.

It was her turn to jump. She disengaged her saber, hooking it to her belt. She brought her hand to rest on his thigh while the other pressed against the body of his TIE fighter for added support.

“Touch me…” she urged.

He readily obliged, moving his hands to slide beneath her tunic.The leather of his gloves was cool against her heated skin as he continued his exploration over the bare flesh of her abs, then her ribs, before moving under her breast band to claim his prize. He cupped both of her breasts in the palms of his hands, his fingers molding and twisting the milky mounds until the peaks of her nipples hardened in response. All the while his tongue and teeth teased her, leaving a wet trail across the nape of her neck.

She moaned, her hand moving from his thigh to cover his as he cradled her breast. She couldn’t control herself, there in his arms, her body writhing against his. She wanted this… wanted more… but how was she supposed to express her desire? She had no experience… no frame of reference of which to fall back on. All she knew was that she needed him to fill her… mind, body and soul.

“Rey…” he groaned. He pressed his lips behind her ear. “Rey… there’s something I want to show you…”

Yes, there was definitely  _ something _ she wanted to see. But even in the lustful haze of her thoughts, she could feel his uncertainty… his inner turmoil. It was enough to give her pause.

She twisted away from him. Much to her chagrin, he immediately let her go, his hands falling to his sides as they pulled apart from each other. She adjusted her clothing before turning to face him. He had moved to the other side of the shop, raking his hand roughly through his hair.

She immediately closed the distance between them. “Show me, “ she encouraged.

He met her gaze. She could see the warring emotions there in his eyes. Her heart lurched in her chest.  _ Too much too soon _ … she chided herself. He was afraid of hurting her… she could sense it.

“Please show me, Kylo.” Cautiously, she slipped her hand in his.

He swallowed and gave a curt nod.


	8. Let the Past Die...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Kylo have a heart to heart.

Kylo entered the elevator with Rey trailing close behind him. The irony wasn’t lost on him - here he was, alone with her, in another elevator.

“All that’s missing are my hands in a set of binders,” she replied, almost as if she read his mind.

She glanced at him over her shoulder, giving him the warmest smile. His heart thumped hard in his chest. 

“I could arrange to have a pair brought here, if the lady so wishes.” He kept his face completely impassive but humor danced in his soft brown gaze.

“Kylo Ren, are you teasing me?” She gave him a playful nudge.

By the Force, he couldn’t stop himself from nudging her back, even smiling a little.  _ What the hell was she doing to him _ ? 

He chanced a glance at her. She was standing by his side now, their elbows brushing as the elevator carried them to their destination. She had the faintest hint of a smile on her lips.

“You’re staring,” she said.

He turned to her. “Tell me what you’re thinking, Rey.”

She faced him. “Why not just read my mind?”

He brushed away a stray lock of her hair that had fallen in her face, surprising her. “I’d rather hear you say it.”

“Alright.” She swallowed, “I was thinking back to our last time in an elevator...how conflicted you were...and how all I really wanted was for you to just kiss me.” Her eyes immediately settled on his lips.

“I wanted it too,” he confided. Then he lowered his head, pulling her lips into the gentlest of kisses. He brought his hand to settle on her cheek, his thumb caressing her soft skin as he repeated the action. He kissed her over and over, each one becoming more hurried...more passionate than the last until she was fully in his embrace, their tongues tangled together in a heated exchange.

Rey was the first to pull back, breaking contact. She was breathing hard, her eyes glazed with lust. She ran one of her fingertips down the length of his scar on the right side of his face with the tenderest of caresses.

“Why did you stop?” he questioned. 

She smiled, “Because the elevator did…”

He followed her gaze to the elevator door, now open. Thankfully, the corridor was empty. 

Reluctantly he released her from his embrace, taking a step back. His body screamed in protest at the loss of contact. His shaft was hard and aching in the confines of his trousers, which, in that moment, seemed way too tight. Being alone with Rey was proving harder to withstand than even the most painful torture Snoke had wrecked upon him.

He took her hand, interlocking their fingers and exited the elevator. “It’s not far,” he told her.

“ _ What _ isn’t far?” She suddenly sounded nervous.

“Something I want to show you,” was all he would say.

He gave her hand a squeeze. She tried to smile, but he noticed it didn’t quite reach her eyes. 

He guided her down the hall, muscle memory leading him through the twisting corridors.

“D-do you ever g-get lost on this ship?” She gulped.

“Maybe years ago…” he shrugged. “But it's been my home for a long time now.”

Rey shook her head, “This isn’t a home. Feels more like a coffin.”

“Right...you prefer an island. I remember…”

“Surely you don’t think  _ this  _ is better than the green hills of Chandrila.”

He stopped, turning to give her a puzzled look, “Who told you I grew up on Chandrila?”

She visibly cringed, “Your mother…”

“Ah.” He returned to walking, his mind churning. What else did Leia tell Rey?  _ And why in hell were they discussing him _ ?

“Don’t be angry,” she pleaded. “It wasn’t like we were sitting around braiding each other’s hair, lamenting over your betrayal. She would just mention in passing about your youth on Chandrila…”

It was his turn to cringe. The last thing he wanted was his mother telling Rey anything about his youth. 

“Say something,” she begged.

“I’m just trying to get rid of the image of you two braiding each other’s hair…” he bit out.

She sighed, “Really, Ben…”

She had slipped again, but just as before, he chose to ignore it. Her seeing him as  _ only  _ Ben Solo would remain a contentious subject between the two of them and he had no wish to revisit that discussion tonight. Or anytime in the near future, if he could help it. He’d just have to accept it… for as long as he could manage.

_ Let the past die...kill it, if you have to _ . 

He thought he had done just that, when his saber sliced through his father so long ago. Ben Solo was supposed to have died on that bridge alongside Han. So why did he feel like the stuttering fool whenever he was in Rey’s presence?

They rounded a corner and he saw their destination up ahead. But as they approached the large door, Rey pulled him to stop. He turned to give her a questioning look but was surprised to see fear in her eyes.

“Wh-where are we going?” she stammered.

“My relics room...Rey, you look like you’ve just seen a ghost.”

She swallowed and her gaze fell on the massive door behind him. It was big and steel, adorned with the symbol of the Sith. It, too, was a relic from his Grandfather’s, taken from the old Death Star. Kylo had procured it long ago and had it restored. Even though he didn’t follow Sith teachings, it was a reminder of a past long denied him by the Solo and Skywalker family. And it happened to be a secure door, able to retain the unstable power from the artifacts he kept safely tucked away.

“Wh-what is that symbol?” Her voice was quiet.

“It’s the symbol of the Sith. Have you not seen it before in your studies of the Jedi?”

“I didn’t exactly have a library on Jakku,” she snapped bitterly. She pulled her hand free of his, crossing her arms protectively over her chest.

_ Ah _ ...he thought. He took a step towards her, his own chest so close to her arms that every time he took a breath, her bare skin lightly grazed him. He brushed that errant lock of hair out of her face again, letting his gloved fingers dance across her cheek in a feathery caress before his thumb traced over her bottom lip. He tilted her chin up, his own mouth meeting hers in a light, pillowy touch. Instantly, he felt her relax, her anger melting away.

“I only meant when you trained with Skywalker on Ahch-to,” he whispered against her mouth. His tongue glided over the seam of her lips. She gasped and he seized upon the opportunity to thrust his tongue inside her open mouth. Her hands settled in his hair as he dragged her close, his mouth devouring hers, searching deep inside her warmth for something...anything…to sate this thirst for her.

“You still taste like plum…” he chuckled, low and deep in his chest. “I wonder how other parts of you taste…” He let his hand wander wantonly down the length of her body, tracing a path from her cheek down the curve of her torso to settle on her waist. He stared unabashedly at her thighs, the secret part of her where he longed to put his mouth next. She released a shaky breath, clutching at the front of his tunic as if her knees were suddenly too weak for her to stand.  _ Good _ , he thought.

_ Things were not going according to plan _ , he quickly realized. Being alone with her like this...he was going to end up dragging her to his quarters and fucking her, his doubts and insecuritites be damned. 

_ Would it be so bad _ , he wondered,  _ if they acted on this...whatever this was… just one time _ ? They could figure everything else out later. And if things didn’t work out between them...he’d still have this moment… this one perfect memory… to console him for the rest of his days.

Suddenly feeling determined, he intertwined their hands and started back towards the elevator.

“Ummmm ...Kylo? I-I thought you had something to show me…”

He was going to show her  _ everything _ . His mind instantly conjured that time the Force Bond thrust them together when he had just stepped out of the refresher ...her maiden blush making those freckles across her nose stand out even more. He groaned inwardly. If he wasn’t careful, he was going to spill himself before he even got them back to his room.

She pulled on his hand, stopping them in their tracks. He turned to look at her, their gazes meeting.

There was a flash in his mind - rolling images in quick succession - the door to his relics room; Rey standing alone before it; no, not alone... and then a dagger driving deep into her belly.

Kylo snatched his hand away in an instant, almost as if she had burned him. He looked down at his gloved palm, expecting to see drops of her blood staining the black leather but finding none. He clenched his hand into a fist before looking up at Rey. She was holding herself protectively, her eyes cast downward.

“Your nightmare…” he stammered. “I kill you…”

She shook her head vehemently, but would not meet his eyes.

He grabbed her roughly, ignoring her sudden yelp of protest. He brought his free hand close to her mind, pulling the information from her thoughts. She struggled against him, her memory shields making it difficult for him to see everything. But he had seen enough.

He released her. They both took a step back from each other.

Kylo stood there in silence, his hands unconsciously clenching and unclenching. The fire in his blood had cooled; the images of him repeatedly stabbing Rey over and over plenty enough to quench his lust. He couldn’t even fathom how she could stand there in his presence, let alone let him,  _ a monster _ , touch her. 

“ _ Say something _ …” her voice in his head called to him.

He looked over at her. There was no mistaking the tears in her eyes. He swallowed, “Forgive me, Rey.”

She took a step towards him and he immediately retreated from her. He knew it was wrong -- could feel her heart breaking but what she didn’t seem to realize was that this was his worst fear materialized - hurting her...killing her.

She wrapped her arms around herself, “I- I don’t think it was warning me about you. I th-think it doesn’t want me to see something behind that door.”

He kept his eyes down, staring hard enough at the steel floor he could probably bore holes through it.

“Please, Kylo, show me what we came here for.” Her voice was soft and pleading.

There were no answers behind that door, just old Sith artifacts. Powerful objects he had obtained over the past year to break the Bond. _But_ _no answers to this..._

“Fine,” he somehow managed to speak. He turned and walked past her, careful to avoid touching her now, lest she inadvertently show him any more troubling images of him murdering her.  _ Perhaps next he’ll Force choke in her sleep _ , he thought sardonically. 

He went to the door, quickly keying in the code. With a whirr and a jolt, it opened. He stepped aside, gesturing for her to enter. She came to stand beside him, staring intently at him. He could feel her trying to will him to look at her.

“I won’t hurt you, Rey.” He felt like it needed to be said but yet he was still unable to meet her gaze.

“I know, Kylo.” She waited a beat then sighed and walked into the room. He followed close behind.

******

Rey had to squint as she entered the room. The walls and floor were a stark white, making the lights in this room so much stronger than in the rest of the ship. 

“Careful of the steps,” Kylo mumbled as he hurried past her.

She looked down to see there were indeed a few steps leading down, giving the room a sunken feeling. Cautiously, she descended, moving further inside. She was hit almost immediately with a sense of dark power… corrupted Force energy she had felt once before, when she walked in Kylo’s mind. The object of power drew her attention. Hesitantly she moved to stand before it.

It was a distorted black helmet, melted in parts, enshrined at the center of a dias in the middle of the room.

“This is…” she began.

“Darth Vader’s helmet ...yes,” he finished for her. He had approached from the left, his own gaze fixed on the relic, arms crossed over his chest. She could sense his turmoil coming from him in waves, rocking against her mind over and over.

“How did you come by it… all of this?” she questioned.

He sighed, running his hand through his hair. “The old ruins of the Death Star, mostly. I’ve been collecting powerful Sith artifacts for a long while now, but most of these things I acquired in the last year.”

She swallowed, “Wh-why?”

He met her gaze, “In hopes that one or more of these things would finally break our Bond.”

Her stomach flipped at his words and she looked away from his sad brown eyes. She began to walk the room, keeping her arms crossed to ward off the temptation to touch one or more of the objects. Most of the items were meaningless to her, knick knacks of a long dead era before her time. But she could feel their Force energy; almost like it was singing to her.

“There’s no dagger.” His voice broke through her reverie. “If that’s what you’re looking for.”

She chanced a glance at him. He was standing next to a large pillar; one shoulder resting against the column, arms still crossed against his chest. His expression was unreadable but his mind was churning - replaying over and over what he saw… repeatedly stabbing her again and again.

“I didn’t mean for you to see it...any of it.”

“You still don’t trust me.” It was a statement not a question.

“It was just a nightmare, Kylo, nothing more,” she tried to reassure him.

“As strong as you are in the Force, your lack of knowledge astounds me.” His words were cutting. “Those aren’t nightmares, Rey. They’re Force visions.”

She shook her head, “You’re wrong. I’ve had Force visions before...these are different. They  _ feel  _ different.”

He snorted his disdain. 

And there it was again - that First Order ego rearing its ugly head. It was hard for her to reconcile that the tall, foreboding man she had been all too willing to sleep with moments ago was the same as the sullen teenager that now stood before her. Kylo Ren or Ben Solo...whatever his name would be… truly was an enigma.

She came to stand before the mask of Vader once again. She had to fight the urge to engage her lightsaber and destroy the very thing he seemed so quick to worship. What was it about the man that pulled Kylo to the darkside? Power? Rage?

Cautiously, she reached a hand out, trailing her fingertips over the hard plastic.

She felt like she was hit with a bolt of lightning as images flooded her mind. But these images were not of death and destruction, like she had been expecting. Instead, she saw a beautiful woman who greatly resembled a younger Leia, her brunette hair flowing in rings of curls down her back. She smiled and giggled as she ran through the fields of Naboo.

Rey quickly withdrew her hand. She turned to look at Kylo who was staring back at her.

“Her name was Padme,” he replied, “She was Luke and Leia’s mother.”

“He loved her. I th-thought all I would feel was anger and hatred but it was love...only love.” Rey stepped back from the mask, the feelings and emotions suddenly overwhelming her.

“Everything he did was for love… her love.” He pushed himself away from the column and closed the distance between them. “Palpatine and the rest of the Jedi council could sense Anakin’s power but also his pull to the darkside that waged a war inside him. The only thing sustaining him was his love for Padme. So Palpatine preyed on that love… fed it doubt and pain, manipulating it until Anakin could no longer distinguish between the two. He filled his head with visions of her death until he eventually broke him, giving rise to the darkness inside. In the end, he would do whatever it took for Padme’s love, even ultimately destroy her.” 

Rey felt her heart sink as she made a realization. She looked up at Kylo, “This is what you wanted to show me…” 

He gently caressed her cheek, “Rey, Snoke did the same to me in that throne room. He sensed my weakness for you and he stoked the flame, hoping it would burn me to ash and a new heir to the darkness would rise… a new Vader, as he called it. He thought I would kill you and finally extinguish the small piece of light that still burned within me…”

“But you didn’t. Ben, don’t you see, you made your choice that day, whether you want to believe it or not, and you chose the light.” She tried to reach up and caress his face but he pulled away, putting distance between them, his back to her now.

She sighed and looked over at that despicable mask almost mocking her on its shrine. 

“Rey, do you know how many times I’ve been to the Engineering Bay during my entire tenure with the First Order?” he suddenly asked, still not facing her. 

He didn’t wait for a response, “Twice.” 

He turned to face her, “Do you know how many times I’ve been to Engineering since  _ you  _ boarded this ship?”

“105 times….” they both spoke in unison.

He briefly looked surprised she knew the answer. “So you  _ did  _ notice…” He sighed, raking his palm down his face. 

“I cannot seem to stay away from you.” He spoke it so softly she wondered if he was talking to her or only to himself. His eyes looked so far away.

She tentatively took a step towards him, “Is that so bad?”

“Rey, its  _ obsession _ . You’re the first thing I think about when I wake, and the last thing I think about before I sleep. You are all consuming.” He paused before adding, “When we are apart, I feel like a part of me is missing. I cannot breathe unless I know you are safe. It’s weakness, Rey. And enemies exploit weakness.”

Rey took another step towards him. “Perhaps its strength.”

He gave her an incredulous look. She took another step towards him.

“You only see it from the perspective of your family - how love drove your Grandfather to the Darkside out of fear he may lose it forever with Padme. But the very notion of love... _ real love _ ...is painful and carries the very real possibility of loss. And that, Ben, is what gives us strength. Strength to fight for what we want...to fight for those we care most about... and win.”

“And what do you know of love, scavenger?” It was his coping mechanism - remind her she was beneath him so she questioned not only her self worth but doubt her own words. But it wouldn’t work on her this time.

She closed the distance between them. He visibly tensed but didn’t try to move away from her. She reached out her hand, taking his much larger one within her grasp and pulled off his glove. He watched intently as she slowly slid her palm against his, their bare skin softly touching.

“I know how I feel...how I’ve  _ felt  _ since that moment on Ahch-to, when you told me I was not alone.”

He released a shaky breath. “I’m not good for you. I have a temper, can be selfish, and the Force knows my ego can make me somewhat...”

“Petulant?” she offered.

He cocked an eyebrow, “Not petulant…prideful.”

“Mmmm...maybe a little.” She brought his hand to her mouth and laid a gentle kiss to his knuckles.

A shudder raked through him and he sighed heavily, “Dameron has feelings for you… surely you must know that.”

“Not this again.” She lowered his hand but did not release him. “Poe is only a friend.”

“He thinks about you…  _ a lot _ … and  _ very loudly _ ,” he bit out, his temper showing. “Especially when I’m around.”

“I-I’ve never given him any reason to-to think…” she stammered.

“He would beg to differ.” His words were cold, his jaw clenched tight but his eyes...they were filled with an indescribable emotion. 

She met his eyes and held his gaze, “I don’t feel anything but friendship for Poe Dameron. You  _ know  _ this.” 

He closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath to settle his own emotions. When he opened them a moment later, he was much more calm.

“I’m only telling you this…” he stopped. He looked up at the ceiling, groaning, “Fuck!” 

He looked down at her again, “He’s a better match for you,” he stated matter-of-factly. “All your friends think so.”

Rey’s mouth fell open at his words then quickly closed it. “And?”

“And they’re your friends. You value their opinion.”

“The only one who decides what is best for me is  _ me _ .”

“Rey, Leia also supports the match. And I know what she thinks matters very much to you.” He yanked free of her, distancing himself.

She watched as he walked to the mask of Vader. He stood there, staring at it, when he spoke next, “It was their plan - Leia and Poe - for the two of you to marry and be the  _ future  _ of their little Resistance.” He said the word future with a degree of hatred and distaste, spitting it out like venom.

He continued, “You see, you are the daughter she has always wanted…” He turned to face her, his face impassive, “And he’s the son she never had.”

Rey’s heart tore inside her. He was hiding his pain, the obvious jealousy he felt towards Poe, because of Leia.

“Ben, your mother loves you. I know it.” Rey wasn’t above pleading, if it meant he’d listen.

He simply shrugged. “Doesn’t matter. I’m a  _ disappointment _ to her. The fact remains if she cannot support our match - my own mother - what hope is there that others will.”

“There’s always hope, Ben,” she urged.

“Rey, if your Force vision…”

“Nightmare.”

“If your  _ Force vision _ told us anything, its that we shouldn’t be together. You’ll die by my hand and your death will destroy the last bit of light left in me. It will be our undoing.”

_ Your coming together will be your undoing _ ….

Rey swallowed, “What if that’s what he wants? To keep us apart?”

“He?” Kylo questioned.

“Palpatine. He said it - our coming together will be our undoing. I heard it before, in your mind and I heard it again in my nightmare…”

“Force vision.”

“Whatever!” She approached him, “Ben, he’s doing exactly what he did to Vader… what Snoke tried to do. He wants me to believe you’ll kill me…” She grabbed his chin and turned him to face her, “But I know you won’t.”

“How do you know, Rey? I’m not even sure I won’t.”

She sighed, “Because we don’t win by fighting against what we hate. We win by fighting for what we love. Rose taught me that.”

She continued, “What I feel for you is raw...sometimes obsessive… but it's  _ real _ . And we owe it to ourselves to explore it.”

He nodded once but backed away from her nonetheless. “I need time, Rey.”

Though it wasn’t exactly what she wanted to hear, at least it wasn’t a no. “Well, if it's one thing I know how to do, it’s wait.” 

She could feel the tears behind her eyes threatening to emerge. She quickly turned away from him so he wouldn’t see.

But of course he knew… he always  _ knew _ . She felt his arms wrap around her, easing her back against his hard, broad chest. His ungloved hand came up to her chin and he tilted her head to look at him. He then lowered his mouth to lay a tender kiss upon her lips before wiping away the tears that had slipped free down her cheeks.

She turned in his embrace and he immediately pulled her close. She buried her face against his chest and breathed deeply, letting his scent fill her.

_ He could never hurt her _ … she thought. She turned her face and her eyes fell on the Vader mask, a foreboding symbol of darkness in the stark white room.

“ _ He filled his head with visions of her death until he eventually broke him, giving rise to the darkness inside _ …”

Rey cringed inwardly. She could almost feel the dagger driving into her belly over and over again.

“Come, let's get out of here,” he spoke, interrupting her thoughts.

She looked up at him and mustered a smile, giving him a nod. He interlocked their fingers and they headed for the door.

Just as they came to the steps, Rey stopped. Kylo turned to give her a questioning look.

Rey yanked free of him and turned back to the room. There was a voice needling her...whispers so faint but urgent. She walked to the mask.

“Rey?” She could hear Kylo call out to her.

She moved around the mask to the shelves behind it, lined with books. She ran her fingertips over the ancient spines as the whispers grew louder and louder.

Kylo came to her side, gripping her elbow, “Rey?”

Again she yanked free, her fingers hurriedly caressing each book. Then it stopped and the room grew eerily quiet.

It was an ordinary book, bound in brown leather, slightly weathered with age. She pulled it from the shelf and laid it before her. She started flipping the pages until she saw what she came for. She held it up for Kylo to see.

His sharp intake of breath answered all her questions. There, drawn in black on the worn page, was a picture of the dagger from her nightmare.

******

“It’s called the Dagger of Mortis,” Rey replied, laying the book on the table to show everyone.

Finn reached across the table, taking the book to see it closer. “Okay, Rey, I’ll bite. What’s it do?”

Rey glanced at Kylo for the briefest of moments. He was standing away from everyone, one shoulder propped against the wall, his arms crossed against his chest. He gave her a slight nod.

She took a breath and responded, “We believe it has the ability to kill immortal beings.”

Everyone shifted uneasily in their chairs, a few murmurs filling the room.

“Say what now?” Finn questioned.

Rey swallowed, “We think its our best advantage against Palpatine. Anakin Skywalker found it once before, as depicted in his journal here. It’s capable of controlling powerful Force wielders but it can also rob someone of his immortality.”

“Anakin Skywalker? You mean Darth Vader,” Poe interjected. “Are we really going to bet all our odds on something written by one of the most villainous Darksiders that ever lived?”

Rey chanced a glance at Kylo before saying, “Not Lord Vader ...Anakin Skywalker. His time with the dagger was before he joined Palpatine. He was still a Jedi.”

Poe snorted his disdain. 

“So where do we find this dagger?” Rose asked.

Rey grew uncomfortable, running her now sweaty palms down the sides of her pant legs. “Well, that’s the tricky part. It seems once Anakin restored the balance to the Force on the planet Mortis, the planet and the dagger both disappeared.”

“You have to be kidding me!” Poe exclaimed. He shot up out of his chair. As soon as he did, Kylo straightened, ready to pounce. Rey met his gaze and gave a quick shake of her head.

“Rey, you cannot expect us to go running around the galaxy looking for a mystical dagger that may or may not exist while the Empire is out there gaining strength! And even if we did find this dagger, you’re not going to get close enough to Palpatine to use it with a hundred Imperial Star Destroyers standing between him and us. We need to better utilize our resources recruiting numbers to our ranks to fight!” Poe slammed his fist down on the table.

“Yes, because that worked so well for you against the First Order….”Kylo replied sardonically.

Poe shot Kylo a dirty look.

“While I don’t share the pilot’s colorful ways of expressing himself, I must say I do agree with him on one point. Dagger or no, we won’t get close enough to Palpatine to use it,” Hux replied.

All eyes turned to Hux with surprise.

“What? I may hate you all, but you’re still the key to our survival in all this.” Hux shrugged.

“Listen, I know how this all sounds, but The Force led me to this journal. This is the way we win. I can feel it.”

“Well, I for one say we trust in Rey. She’s never let us down before,” Rose backed her up.

“I assume you two have a plan for finding this dagger whats-it-called… otherwise we wouldn’t be here right now,” Finn answered.

“Holocrons,” Kylo replied.

“Holocrons?” Finn questioned.

“A Jedi Holocron and a Sith Holocron, to be exact. We locate one of each and then, once merged, they will give us the location of the dagger,” Kylo finished.

“Just like that?” came Poe’s sarcastic comment.

Rey could sense Kylo’s growing irritation with Poe, so when she saw him take a step towards the pilot, she quickly came between them.

“I mean, it sounds easy enough, but Jedi and Sith holocrons are rare, to say the least,” she said.

Poe looked around her at Kylo, “You’re a Sith, don’t you have one laying around here somewhere…”

“I am not a Sith,” Kylo bit out, his jaw clenched so tightly Rey was afraid he might hurt himself.

“Sith… Darksider… they’re all the same to me - expendable,” Poe replied.

“Much like pilots,” Kylo answered.

“Alright, I think we’ve heard enough. So we need to start looking for these holocrons. I’m thinking possibly Black Market…?” Leave it to Finn to try to calm the escalating tension in the room.

Rey agreed, “Yes. What I need from you is to reach out to any of your contacts, asking them about Jedi Holocrons. Kylo will have his team do the same for the Sith Holocron.”

“Alright, Rey, you got it.” Finn stood up. “If that’s all, I have drills to run with the stormtroopers before lunch.”

Rey looked over at Kylo. His back was to her now, his hands clasped together. She could feel his mind churning but his mental shields were firmly in place, hiding his thoughts.

She cleared her throat, “Supreme Leader?”

He glanced over at her before completely turning to face the others, “General Hux, while we wait for word on the holocrons, I think maybe it wouldn’t hurt for you and Dameron to sit down and discuss a strategy of recruitment. We are going to need allies against the Empire.”

“Why me?” Hux whined. But when he saw the look Kylo gave him he immediately slouched in his chair, “Of course, Supreme Leader.”

“Very well, you’re all dismissed.” Kylo immediately turned away from them, retreating to the window, his mind still in deep contemplation.

The group started to file out of the room but Rey stopped herself at the door. She turned to look at Kylo. “Supreme Leader, a word?”

He didn’t turn to face her, just simply said, “What is it, Rey?”

She approached him, coming to his side. “Thank you,” she whispered, “For throwing Poe a bone.”

“I didn’t do it for him.”

She sighed, “I know.” She moved her hand at her side, to lightly graze his gloved palm with her fingertips.

He immediately moved away from her. He leaned against the edge of the table, stretching his long legs out in front of him, his palms resting on the surface. “He’s not wrong, you know.”

She gave him a questioning stare.

“The galaxy isn't exactly going to just fall in line with the First Order. We will need allies for this to work.”

“Then leave it to Poe. He can be very persuasive when he needs to be.”

Kylo cocked an eyebrow, “Can he now?”

She smiled as she closed the distance between them, coming to stand directly in front of him. “At least that’s what I’ve heard.”

Kylo reached out and tugged on the band around Rey’s waist, pulling her closer. “Just  _ heard _ ?” he questioned.

She nodded. She brought her hand to rest on his cheek. He turned and laid a chaste kiss on the inside of her palm. She shuddered as her whole body filled with the unmistakable heat from that one little bit of contact.

He yanked her into his arms, pressing his lips to the hollow of her throat, his tongue tracing a path to her jawline. She couldn’t help but pant her pleasure, her fingers weaving through his hair as she held him close.

“I need a teacher,” she whispered.

“Mmmm…” he purred, “Do you?” His hands slid beneath her tunic.

She slapped them away, drawing back. “Not for  _ this _ , Kylo. I want you to train me… in the Force.”

He groaned, his hand running through his hair. He rose, walking away from her. “No,” he stated firmly.

“Why not? I need to be ready for when we face Palpatine. You offered it once before.”

He gave her a  _ look _ , “You and I both know I just wanted to fuck you.”

She smiled as she remembered their first fight in the snowy forest, how turned on they both obviously were trying to kill each other; their passion igniting and clashing like their lightsabers. But the fact was she did need a teacher…  _ and  _ she also needed a way to keep him close, to break down his walls and make him see they truly belonged together.

“You’ll hate me,” he whispered.

She joined his side, “Never.”

He snorted. “I doubt that.”

She took his hand in hers and gave it a squeeze, “Please, Kylo…”

He sighed heavily, “Alright. We can try it.” He squeezed her hand in return, then pulled away. He grabbed his helmet from a nearby table, “I have to go meet with my Generals. But you can join me this afternoon for my training session.”

She swallowed down her excitement, responding with a simple “Thank you”.

He acknowledged it with a quick nod.

She followed behind him as they exited the room. He whirled on her, surprising her, “I’ll not go easy on you, Rey, so be prepared.”

She nodded but couldn’t seem to stop smiling at him. He wanted to touch her in that moment. She could feel it radiating from him. Instead he sighed then slipped on his mask. She watched as he walked away, marveling at his powerful strides until he disappeared from view.

She turned to go in the opposite direction towards Engineering, her mind lost in thoughts of sweaty training sessions with a shirtless Kylo Ren, when she smacked into Poe, quite literally. It knocked her off balance for a brief moment and he reached out to steady her. Her instinct made her recoil from his touch. She met his gaze. He did not look pleased.

“Rey, what the hell do you think you’re doing?” he questioned.

She was taken aback by his harsh tone. But just as Kylo had mentioned, his thoughts were very loud --a quick peek answered all her questions. Poe had spied her with Kylo.

“It’s not really any of your business,” she replied and tried to push past him.

He grabbed her arm to stay her retreat. “It is my business when it affects the Resistance! Are we here just so you can fool around with your Sith boyfriend?!”

Rey yanked her arm out of his grasp, “We are  _ here  _ because we needed the First Order to rescue us or have you forgotten?”

“A convenient plan manipulated by Ren to make him look like the hero,” Poe bit out.

“Yes, he plotted with the Empire to come and destroy us just so he could sacrifice half his troops to save us.” Poe was starting to infuriate her.

“To save  _ you… _ We were just collateral.”

“I’ve heard enough.” Rey started to walk away.

“Tell me, Rey, do you think you’d still feel the same way for him if he broke this..this  _ bond… _ you two share?”

Rey stopped and turned to look at Poe.

He continued, “He said he was going to break it, didn’t he? Let him do it. Then we’ll see exactly how you feel about him.”

“You don’t know anything about our bond…”

“Doesn’t seem like you do, either.” He approached her, “Did you ever stop to think what if he’s just using us to find this dagger...using  _ you _ ? The Jedi Holocron… it can only be opened by a Jedi, right? You’re the last one. He wants that dagger, Rey. So ask yourself, who is he planning to use it on? Palpatine? Or you?”

And with that, Poe walked away.


	9. There Is No Light Without The Dark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo teaches Rey a lesson about anger.

Rey hit the training room floor hard, the wind rushing from her lungs in a large whoosh. She groaned as the pain bit into her side.  _ This was definitely not what she had in mind _ …..

“Again,” came the familiar baritone of Kylo Ren. 

Rey closed her eyes for the briefest of moments as she tried to regain her breath. She slowly pushed herself up on her forearms.

“Get up, Rey,” Kylo ordered.

Force above, she hated him in that moment, the deep silkiness of his voice making her cringe inwardly. But she took a deep breath and scurried to her feet, just in time for the battle droid to strike out at her.

It attacked at her left, which she managed to successfully parry, but then it immediately swung at her right, the blow connecting at her abdomen. She doubled over, and it used the staff in its left hand to crack against her back. She fell to her hands and knees.

Kylo sighed from his perch across the room. He was leaning casually against a stack of mats, his tone a mix of boredom and agitation. “Again,” he recited.

Rey coughed, clutching her stomach, “I need a minute.”

She could almost feel his eyes roll as he pushed himself away from the mats. “Computer, end simulation,” he huffed as he stalked towards her. He extended his hand to her and as much as she wanted to refuse him, she took it. He easily hauled her to her feet. Much to her chagrin, he didn’t linger. He immediately released his hold on her and walked away, clearly distancing himself from her.

He grabbed his data pad and started flipping through documents, using his finger to sign or add his initials where they were needed. She knew he was just ignoring her, choosing to busy himself with his Supreme Leader duties while he waited for her to catch her breath.

They had been training every day for the last two weeks. Well, she had been training with battle droids while he watched, critiqued and often criticized her. He had yet to pick up his lightsaber against her, instead building simulations with the droids. She’d swear at least one of them used very similar moves to Kylo’s own during their forest fight on Starkiller Base. But she knew he’d never admit to it.

She tried shaking out her arms, loosening the tired muscles, and taking a few deep breaths. Every part of her body was sore and bruised, and not in the  _ fun way _ she had been hoping for. “Okay, I’m ready.”

“Are you now?” He didn’t even look at her, still concentrating on his datapad. 

She gave him a look of disapproval, not that he saw it with his eyes glued to that infuriating contraption. She kept staring at him, waiting for him to acknowledge her. She balled her hands into fists and felt  _ something _ she refused to name rise up inside her. Suddenly the datapad flew from his grasp and crashed against the opposing wall, the glass smashing into pieces.

He sighed again and looked up at her. “Something bothering you, Rey?”

“I thought we would be training together! Instead you sit there with that stupid thing while I battle droids!”

He straightened to his full height, his arms crossing over his chest, “You think you’re ready for me? I’ve seen Padawan half your age end those droids in the time it’s taken you to fall on your face.”

“Then teach me something! You know I can fight! And I have enough power to rival your own!” Rey exclaimed.

“Rey, you cannot expect it to happen overnight. True, you have an exceptional amount of raw power and yes, you carry yourself well in a brawl, but you need to hone the basics before you can expect to face someone whose has spent most of his life training to kill.”

Rey groaned. She wasn’t sure which she was frustrated with more - battling his endless array of droids or his arrogance. She took a few deep, cleansing breaths before resuming her stance. “I’m ready.”

He stood there, studying her. Then he walked away, crossing the room to the weapons cabinet. She watched as he withdrew a red cloth from one of the drawers before returning to her side. 

He moved behind her, bringing the red scrap of cloth to wrap around her.

She tried to pull away, “What are you doing?”

He cocked an eyebrow, “Training you.” He secured the red cloth over her eyes before tying it behind her head.

His hands fell on her shoulders and he leaned in to whisper in her ear, “Your eyes deceive you so you cannot trust them.”

She swallowed, “Then who do I trust? You?”

He chuckled low, bringing the front of his hard body to press against her backside, making her breath catch. “Hardly,” he purred. “Trust in the Force, Rey. Let the Force be your guide.”

He stepped away from her. She tried to concentrate on his footsteps, listening for the direction he went.

“Computer, initiate simulation DG-121019,” she heard him order.

Rey cleared her mind, focusing now on the sounds of the droid she knew was approaching.

“Do not simply rely on the Force to save you. Feel the Force flow through you...let it guide your actions and your reaction…” His voice sounded far away and she realized it was in her mind.

Suddenly she felt the droid swing on her right. Quickly she sidestepped its attack, parrying its next blow with her lightsaber. A faint gust of air blew across her left cheek, whisking her hair away from her face. There was another droid! She felt it, before it could attack, and she sliced rhymically through it, severing its arm. She didn’t hesitate, whipping her blade to the right, catching the second droid, her lightsaber running it through. 

She wanted to celebrate. She had finally did it. After two long weeks, she was the one left standing. She disengaged her lightsaber and made to remove her blindfold.

“See? I told you I’m a quick learner.” Her hand froze before she could remove the cloth. Suddenly she was knocked off her feet as Kylo rendered her immobile with the Force. She heard her lightsaber clatter to the floor. He kicked it to her, releasing his hold on her.

“Pick it up,” he ordered, his voice cold and menacing.

Panic struck at her very core. He didn’t sound like himself. He sounded like the monster from her nightmares - the ones from before the truce where he killed her over and over. Blindly she felt around for her weapon, bile rising in her throat as thoughts of him cutting her down filled her head. She grabbed it and ignited it, quickly getting to her feet. He was already moving towards her, and she yelped as she felt him strike a blow. She barely managed to move out of the way in time. 

She heard him slide across the floor, crouching down in a predatory stance. Then he moved towards her again or at least she thought he did. She tried to call on the Force, tried desperately to concentrate on his movements. But one moment she thought she felt him in front of her, the next he was striking at her side.

She whipped around, using both hands to block his overhead blow. She pushed with all her strength against him, hoping he would stumble or make a mistake. He simply disappeared.

She couldn’t hear or feel him. She kept turning in place, her lightsaber at the ready. Her breathing was hard, her pulse beating so rapidly it was deafening her.  _ Where the hell was he _ ?

There was a feather light caress across her cheek as his gloved fingers teased her. She twirled around but he wasn’t there.  _ Why wasn’t the Force responding to her _ ? She suddenly felt movement in front of her and she whipped her blade back and forth wildly to ward off a possible attack while also backing away from him.

She smacked against him, his hand clasping her throat from behind. He gently squeezed, not enough to hurt or choke her, only making it hard to swallow. She could hear the buzz of his lightsaber humming close to her face; feel the heat from the unstable blade.

“You’re dead, Rey,” he whispered against her ear, his breath hot against her sweat soaked skin.

She pulled away from him in frustration and he let her go, disengaging his lightsaber. She yanked the blindfold off, giving him a furious look.

“That wasn’t fair!”

He cocked an eyebrow, “Which part? Where you erroneously thought your only threat was the droids or where out of sheer panic you abandoned your training and gave into your fear?” He shrugged.

“All of it! I wasn’t ready!”

“My apologies, my Queen, next time I’ll warn you when I’m about to attack,” he gave her a mocking bow. But as he rose, a cocky smirk on his face, she reacted, shoving him hard in his chest. He stumbled back, a look of genuine surprise on his handsome visage.

“Rey, don’t be angry because you lost...” he chided her, absently rubbing where she hit him.

She suddenly called upon the Force, grabbing and wrenching his lightsaber from his hand before he could react. His shock made him react slower so she took the opportunity to wipe that smug look off his face, once and for all. She whipped his weapon around her and threw it back at him, hitting him in the back of his head before it clattered to the floor.

“Hey!” he exclaimed. She could feel his anger rising. It threatened to fill her and she decided in the heat of the moment, she’d let it in...just this once.

“Pick it up,” she bit out. She ignited her own saber at her side.

His jaw clenched tight and she could practically hear him grind his teeth. “Are you sure this is what you want to do?”

“Pick it up!” she yelled.

His gaze locked with hers and he held it as he slowly lowered himself to retrieve his weapon. His hand had barely wrapped along the shaft before she attacked. He just managed to roll away from her, quickly igniting his saber. She swung manically, slicing right, left and cascading overhead blows down on him. He blocked each one, but stumbled at the sudden force of her onslaught that he couldn’t parry or counter-attack her. 

So he did what came naturally to him.

Calling on the Force, he pulled her feet from underneath her. She fell backwards so suddenly, hitting the ground hard, knocking the wind out of her. It was enough of a chance for him to quickly get to his feet.

Rage welled inside her. She scrambled to stand. He was simply waiting for her, nonchalantly twirling his blade, tossing it back and forth between his two hands. He met her gaze, held it as he gestured for her to come and get him.

She knew he was baiting her but it was almost like she was no longer in control of her actions. She ran at him, blade drawn. He casually swiped her away as he whirled around. She stumbled into the wall, just barely catching herself.

“What’s the matter, Rey? Tell me you’re not holding back, hmm?” He was taunting her.

“Aren’t I your enemy?” he continued, “...the monster who killed Han? The reason Skywalker is dead? I killed them, Rey…..And I’d do it again.”

She growled, reigniting her lightsaber. This time he didn’t wait. He came after her, his attacks sharp. She somehow managed to dodge his blows, briefly parrying his attack to give her enough time to drop to her knees and use the Force to pull her between his legs, sliding away from him. 

Quickly she regained her footing, whirled around and saw him stalking towards her. She met him halfway, exchanging blow after blow, their lightsabers hissing as they clashed. She realized in that moment that in all their past fights, Kylo Ren had been holding back. His strength was unparalleled and as he directed overhanded attacks against her, it took everything she had just to stay on her feet.

He swung at her right side and she attempted to Force freeze him in an effort to save herself from the blow she knew she couldn’t counter-attack in time. But he was too powerful. At the last second, he reversed his saber, striking at her with a powerful backhand swing. It knocked her saber from her hand, the blade skittering away from her. He didn’t stop coming. Her only recourse was to back away as fast as she could. He knocked her off her feet, gently letting her fall to the ground now as he came to stand over her.

“Never do that again!” he bellowed.

She gazed up at him with contempt. Her mind so addled with rage and anger.

He smirked, “You want to hit me…I see it.” He stepped back, “Okay, Scavenger, hit me.”

He disengaged his saber and replaced it on his belt. He held his hands up, his arms open wide. “Go ahead, hit me.”

She rose to her feet, her mind reeling at his words. Of their own volition, her hands balled into fists. She struck out at him, but he stepped back, out of range. She tried again but he repeated the same movement, easily dodging the blow.

“Hit me for real, love!” he yelled at her.

She released all her pent up rage in a warrior cry, coming at him with everything she had. He knocked her back with the Force, bringing her to softly land on her backside on the floor. She tried to immediately stand up but he only swept her legs out from under her.

“Stay down,” he ordered, “And get used to that position.”

He placed his hands on his hips, turning away from her, his breathing rapid and uncontrollable. 

She took a few deep breaths, as the anger started to subside. She looked up at him as the fog in her brain cleared. 

He ran his palm down his face, his eyes closing as he massaged the stress from his temples with his thumb and forefinger. 

Suddenly, everything that had just transpired washed over her, filling her with shame. 

“What have I done?” she moaned, her own hands covering her face.

“You let the anger control you, lashing out blindly with rage…” he replied, his tone even. He paused before adding, “...and you failed.”

“I’m sorry, Kylo. I’m so sorry. I just got so angry at you.”

“Yeah, well, I have been known to bring out the worst in people.”

She tested their connection. He had released her from the Force and she rose to her feet. Cautiously, she tried to approach him. He, of course, backed away.

He crossed the room and grabbed her lightsaber from the floor, before returning to her side, handing it back to her. “I think that’s enough for today, don’t you?”

She took the weapon, tentatively reaching into his mind to ascertain his feelings. But she only found the all too familiar wall he used to block her.

He walked away from her, returning to the destroyed droids. He started picking up the pieces, putting them into a pile for someone to dispose of later.

She swallowed, “Is this how you were trained? Through anger and hate?”

He momentarily stopped what he was doing. “Skywalker treated you with kid-gloves, did he?”

She came to his side, helping him collect the ruined parts. “I-I barely trained with him. He was extremely bitter about the Jedi Order. And-and he was frightened of my power...”

Kylo snorted. “Had you done to him what happened here, he would have fed you some bullshit line like ‘Confronting fear is a Jedi’s destiny’...”

Rey smiled a little, knowing that's exactly what Luke would have said.

“Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering…”Kylo recited.

“Who did you hear that from? Snoke?”

“Yoda.”

Kylo rose, crossing the room, to put distance between himself and Rey. His back was to her as he said, “The suffering leads to the darkside. That's the part Snoke taught me. He took my suffering and he taught me to turn it into strength. The hate and anger I inherited from Ben Solo.”

He turned to face her, “You let your fear of me control you today. Next time, take that fear, turn it into anger and then use it to your advantage. Let it be the power.” 

She hugged herself, “I don’t want to ever feel that way again.”

“Then you will lose.” His tone was so matter-of-fact. 

He took a step towards her, “Your enemies will always be bigger...stronger...so you must use the one thing they will never have -  _ your pain _ .” He paused before adding, “The pain of knowing what it feels like to be abandoned by those that are supposed to love you…” There was no mistaking the tremble of his lip when he spoke and he quickly turned away from her, his hands running through his hair.

She knew he was referring to her parents but the raw emotion his face betrayed made her think he was also talking about himself.

She swallowed, “Ben, why did you go to Jakku?” She hated how her voice shook.

His head snapped around to her. He opened his mouth to reply but quickly closed it. He moved away, going to retrieve his broken datapad. “The Force led me there,” was all he said.

“During your mission to break the bond?”

“Yes.”

She stared at him, waiting for more but he just stared at the broken screen of the datapad, never meeting her gaze. She sighed, the back of her hand dashing away the tears that spilled from her unwarranted.

“I think… I think it wanted to give me a better understanding of you… of the life you once led. You see, what we have is very rare and we are opposites in every way but…” He stopped.

“But we are two halves of the same coin,” she finished.

“Yes.”

“We belong together,” she replied.

“I’m not sure I see it that way. But we balance each other… we balance the Force.”

She considered his words, “For that to be, does it mean one us must always be light and the other dark?”

“I don’t know,” he whispered.

She approached him, drawing close enough to touch him but refraining, “What if we broke the bond? You said you know how.”

He looked down at her, “Is that what you want, Rey?”

“I want to better understand this  _ thing  _ we have… Won’t you share with me what you discovered?”

He continued to stare at her for the space of several heartbeats before drawing himself up to his full height. “No,” he breathed. Then he walked away from her, heading for the exit.

“I’m late for a debriefing.” He hit the scanner on the door and walked out, never once looking back at her.

Rey was crestfallen. She couldn’t stop the doubt seeping into her mind. Was Poe right? Was Kylo Ren just using her to get to the dagger - using the feelings of desire and love the bond was creating to his own advantage? She didn’t want to believe it. But why else was he so adamant not to share what he knew? More importantly, if he wanted her half as fiercely as she wanted him, how did he manage to avoid touching her… being with her?

She looked down at her hand. She had drawn blood on her palms, the half moon shaped indentations from her fingernails pressed so tightly to restrain her from reaching for him just moments before. It was taking everything she had inside her to keep herself in check… yet he seemed altogether unaffected.

And it was breaking her heart.

*******

Kylo walked out of the training room, his breathing growing shallow. He could feel Rey’s uncertainty, her doubt...her  _ pain  _ slamming into him. He turned and walked into the first room he saw on his left.

He slammed the door shut behind him with the Force. He leaned forward on the nearest table, desperately trying to catch his breath. He ripped at the tunic around his neck, hoping it would help him to breathe.

He inhaled a deep, shuddering breath, exhaling slowly.

Then he picked up the nearest chair, slamming it into the table. He picked up another and threw it into the computer console situated on the other side of the room. 

He ignited his lightsaber, raising it to start dismantling the room in a furious rage.

But he stopped just short of making it happen. He lowered his blade, disengaging it. He laid it on the table.

Slowly he sank to the floor as the rage turned into overwhelming sadness. Her sadness.

He closed his eyes as he felt the first tears start to fall down his cheeks.

******

“We have our first lead on the Jedi Holocron,” Hux announced. He punched in a sequence on the keyboard, bringing up an image of a planet for Kylo to see. “Pasaana.”

“A desert planet on the edge of the galaxy?” Kylo sighed. “Fuck.”

“Yes, well, this next part won’t exactly please you either,” Hux replied, rolling his eyes. “The species there, known as the Aki-Aki are definitely not supporters of the First Order. We land there and it's likely we’ll start an all out war.”

Kylo cringed. “Which means…” he began, but was interrupted when he felt a hand settle roughly on his shoulder.

“...Which means this is a job for the Resistance,” Poe replied, barely containing his mirth. To add insult to injury, he gave Kylo a quick pat to the larger man’s back.

Kylo’s rage burned at the pilot’s impertinence and he turned aggressively towards Poe, but standing beside Poe was Rey. The minute their gazes met, Kylo took a step back. He immediately moved to the other side of the table to stand with Hux. Rose and Finn had also joined Poe’s side.

“All right…”Poe replied, staring at the image before him, “What exactly am I looking at here?”

Hux gave an agitated sigh, “This is the planet Pasaana as a whole but if you look here…” He expanded the image, “...here is where the contact has agreed to meet to negotiate a trade for the holocron.”

Hux continued, “There is a large festival happening at this moment in the closet city. This will provide much needed cover for the trade but it will make any possible needs for escape or rescue virtually nil. You will need to take a small team and land just outside the city limits, tracking partially through the harsh desert landscape to meet with the contact at the purported rendezvous point.”

“Sounds easy enough,” Poe replied. “Rey and Finn will accompany me. We’ll take the Millenium Falcon, so as not to draw suspicion.”

Kylo cleared his throat, “Sorry to break up your little trio but Finn is needed here and Rey…” he paused, his eyes briefly turning to her, “...Rey needs to continue her training. You will take Hux and Rose.”

“What?!” both Hux and Poe exclaimed.

“Me?” came Rose’s response.

“Listen here, Ren, this is  _ my _ mission. I will decide who stays and who goes.”

Kylo straightened, “The last time I checked, you work for the First Order. Hux, who is Supreme Leader of the First Order?”

“You are, sir,” Hux grumbled.

Kylo gave Poe a deadly smile, “Yes I am. So when I say Finn and Rey will not be accompanying you on this particular trip, then they  _ will not be accompanying you _ . Have I made myself clear?”

“Kylo, you’re being unreasonable…” Rey began but shut her mouth when Kylo threw her a  _ look _ . He had made only one request of her—she could call him whatever she wished in private, but she must respect his position as Supreme Leader in front of his subordinates.

He turned his attention back to the holo of Hux’s map, “Rey will fly Poe, Rose and Hux to the Pasaana desert on the Millenium Falcon. Those three will continue to the rendezvous point to meet the seller and negotiate for the Holocron. I will fly my TIE Whisperer and meet with Rey on the planet where we will wait for the trio to return. Meanwhile, we will continue your training. Is everyone clear?”

Rose cautiously raised her hand.

“Yes, Rose?” Kylo asked, exasperated.

“I-I thought Hux said if-if First Order presence was detected, there could be a war. Won’t they see the TIE?” Rose asked.

“They’ll be looking for our larger ships, not one small TIE Fighter,” Hux explained.

“Oh.” She swallowed nervously.

Kylo met Finn’s gaze across the table. Silence passed between them.

“One last thing…” Kylo finally replied. “Everyone will be fitted with monitors, small tracking devices that will measure heart rate, vitals and what not. Rose, you’ll be in charge of alerting me if anything seems out of the ordinary. Understood?”

Everyone murmured their acceptance...everyone except Poe. He had his thumbs hooked in his utility belt, openly glaring at Kylo.

Kylo cocked an eyebrow, “Something you wish to say, flyboy?”

“Rey is one of the strongest fighters we have in the Resistance; hell, she’s even beaten you…” Poe started.

“Poe…” Rey warned, grabbing the man by his elbow.

“No, Rey, let the man speak,” Kylo intervened.

“I’m just saying, you sending me in there with two people I  _ have _ to protect, without backup...seems like you don’t intend for me to come back,” Poe finished.

Kylo smirked, “Rose happens to be one of the best fighters I’ve seen. And Hux will be there to make sure you’re not working against the First Order in any capacity.”

Poe snorted. “I think Rey should get to decide for herself what she wants.”

Kylo slammed his palm down on the table, “This is not a negotiation! I will not send the last damned Jedi on a fool’s errand which may or may not be a trap! My word is final. If you want to continue arguing, get the fuck off my ship!”

Kylo swiftly turned away, his cape whipping around him. “Hux, you have the bridge,” he bit out before storming off.

Hux swallowed, “Right. Well… you all have your assignments. We should go and prepare everything. You’re dismissed.”

Finn immediately joined Rey and Rose, “Rey, what the hell did you do to Kylo Ren?”

“Why do you think it was me?” she asked innocently.

They both gave her a  _ look _ . “Well whatever it was, I think you broke him,” Finn replied.

Finn pulled Rose to him, laying a quick kiss on her forehead. “Come see me before you go. And be safe...all of you.”

Finn walked away, leaving an opening for Poe. “Rey, I need you to prepare the Falcon. The sooner the better. I need some space from this ship.” Poe didn’t wait for an answer before making his exit.

Rose turned to Rey, “I have a bad feeling about this mission, Rey.”

“I know,” she agreed. 

She caught movement over Rose’s shoulder. Kylo stood by the entryway to the bridge, leaning against the door frame, watching her. 

He held her gaze for a long moment then reached up and pulled on his mask. He gave her one last longing look before he turned and disappeared from view.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, more angst for our favorite couple, but I swear, its going to lead to them giving into that passion. Comments and thoughts appreciated.


	10. Peace is a Lie; There's only Passion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So begins the mission to Paasana to retrieve the Jedi Holocron.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry its been over a month. TROS was a disaster and I needed time to mourn. And I had the flu. This is an extra long chapter where a lot happens. Look out for some surprise #gingerose content. I think this may evolve into a TROS fix-it fic, as well. Hope you enjoy it.

Rey tossed her pack onto the nearest seat as she entered the Millennium Falcon. She made her way to the pilot’s chair, releasing a heavy sigh as she sat down. She stared blindly at the controls before her, not really seeing them as her mind wandered aimlessly. As was always the case of late, Kylo Ren pushed into the forefront of her thoughts.

She hated what had transpired during their last training session. And to follow it with that travesty of a meeting… Her insides clenched at the unwanted memory.

Kylo losing his temper had shook her. In that one brief moment, all his shields had dropped and she could feel every warring emotion which tumbled through his broken mind. His lust for her, his fight to maintain power and control, the love he had for his mother, the agony he felt over the death of his father and the unquenchable jealousy aimed at Poe. 

And what pained her the most was that she didn’t exactly disagree with Poe. She _ should _be the one to accompany him on this mission. But to openly fight Kylo on the matter would only further damage their relationship. As of right now, she was again confused on exactly where she stood with him.

_ There was just so much left unspoken _...

She gave her head a quick shake, refusing to ruminate any further on his troubled soul. She focused on the task before her, running through the pre-flight checklist. They just needed to get through this mission. If they succeeded, perhaps everything else could be worked out between him and Poe. Finally Kylo would see what an asset Poe truly was to them and Poe...well...Poe would still see Kylo Ren as the villainous Supreme Leader of the First Order. That was going to be a hard opinion to change, seeing as how the first time they met, Kylo had tortured information from the pilot.

_ Would any of the Resistance ever see Kylo as anything other than the Jedi Killer, an unredeemable monster who needed to pay for his crimes _? The question gave Rey pause. 

She sat back in her seat, her arms crossed over her chest. Let’s say they somehow managed to defeat Palpatine and the Empire - then what? The Resistance and the First Order return to being enemies? Would Kylo and Rey go back to being force bonded soulmates, separated by their allegiances? 

He had made it clear he wasn’t interested in redemption. And Rey had seen enough of his mind to know he didn’t believe he needed to be redeemed - what he has done, he’d do so again. It made Rey question - _ what future, if any, did they even have to look forward to _?

Rey huffed in frustration, rising from the pilot’s seat to continue the pre-flight check. She flipped switches overhead with perhaps a little too much force, her ire giving rise to her own inner petulant child. Right then, she’d give anything to grab Kylo Ren by his tunic and give him a good shake.

As if on cue, her eyes fell on the broken compressor she had spent many sleepless nights the past year trying to fix. She picked it up, her fingers trailing over the cracks in the metal. Her heart suddenly lurched in her chest as tears pricked her eyes. She couldn’t tell if it was from the memories of Han threatening to emerge or those of his only son who, deny as he might, was exactly like him.

Rey felt dizzy suddenly, grabbing onto the nearest wall for support as she was overtaken with what was becoming an all too familiar feeling blooming with warmth in her chest. It traveled quickly through her limbs, giving rise to a deep blush on her skin and causing her thighs to clench in anticipation. This visceral feeling had only been growing more powerful over the last few weeks and she was certain it meant the bond was evolving into something _ more _...something deeper. 

She turned to look outside the window of the Falcon. _ Speak of the devil and he shall appear _, she thought absently. 

There was Kylo Ren, marching into the hanger with two stormtroopers struggling to keep up. He stood so tall and formidable, the power of his strides alluding to his authority. He simply commanded attention without the need for words…. something Rey had always admired and yet feared about him. With his infuriating mask clutched tightly in his right fist, it was clear he was a man on a mission. 

She watched intently as he gave orders to the stormtroopers before climbing into his TIE fighter, more than likely starting his own pre-flight checklist. Her anger at him suddenly becoming a distant memory, she was consumed in that moment with thoughts of how much she wanted to _ climb him… _ to straddle his large thighs as their tongues danced and their hands teased. Her mouth suddenly dry, she licked her lips for added moisture. _ Damn that man and his insufferable masculinity _. 

She mumbled a slew of curses under her breath even as her traitorous legs carried her to the exit of the Falcon. She made her way to the TIE just as Kylo was pulling himself from the cockpit.

He was surprised to see her. She could see it in his eyes. But he quickly masked it behind a cold look of indifference. He gave her a curt nod, “Rey”. He stepped around her. 

She turned to follow him but suddenly her legs were no longer cooperating and words failed her. She just stared at him, almost dumbfounded.

“Something you need, Rey?” he asked as he turned away from her and knelt beside his ship.

_ Yes _ , her mind screamed, _ for you to thoroughly fuck me in the cock pit of your stupid ship I helped to rebuild _.

Images of exactly what she wanted him to do to her flashed through her mind in an instance. Desire clenched low in her stomach and she released a shuddering breath.

She saw every muscle in his body tense and panic seized her. _ Holy hell, had he just seen her thoughts _?

He slowly rose and turned to face her. His face was expressionless but there was something alight in his eyes. His dark gaze burned with emotion. “Well?” he asked, his tone neutral.

“Are we okay?” The words rushed out of her in a single breath. She didn’t know where they came from but she was thankful for them nonetheless.

He unmistakably clenched his jaw as he took a moment to consider his answer. Then he released a breath she didn’t know he had been holding, visibly relaxing, “As okay as two mortal enemies can be.”

“You’re not my enemy…” she shyly smiled.

“We’ll see,” he replied, a hint of his own smile on his lips. Just the simple quirk of his lips did things to her insides that she could not readily explain. One of these days, she was going to elicit a full fledged grin from this man… or die trying.

He walked to the rear of the TIE now and she immediately followed. He was inspecting every inch of the fighter.

“I can promise you, she’s in perfect working order,” she said. She and Rose had made sure of it, taking immense pride in their handiwork. Though they never said it out loud, they both had wanted to impress the great Kylo Ren.

“Hmph…” came his response, before disappearing into the shadows behind his ship.

Rey stood there for a moment, a little taken aback. Was he really so impossible to please?! Intent on giving him a piece of her mind about graciousness and gratitude, she moved behind his ship to follow him.

She gasped as she was thrust back against the rear of the ship, Kylo’s hands tangling in her hair as his lips crushed against hers. She didn’t hesitate, bringing her arms to encircle his neck, pulling him closer. She needed to feel his hard form against her, comfort herself with the heat from his body. She just needed to know he still wanted her… wanted _ this _…

She opened her mouth, giving more of herself to him. He thrust his tongue inside, growling his pleasure. His hands were suddenly on her cheeks, holding her still as he deepened the kiss, exploring every inch of the warm wetness. But then he tore himself away from her lips, dragging his teeth across the sensitive skin of her jaw, trailing his tongue to the hollow of her throat. His gloved hands skimmed down the sides of her body, tracing over her ribs to settle beneath the curves of her breasts. He pushed up on the milky mounds, letting them fill his palms while his thumbs danced over the already hardened peaks of her sensitive nipples. She bit her lip to keep from crying out his name.

He brought his mouth to hers again. “Don’t…” he whispered against her lips. “I want to hear you.”

“Kylo…” she whisper-cried. She grabbed hold of his mouth with her own, her teeth drawing his full bottom lip inside for her to suckle. She pushed herself wantonly into his hands, desperate to be rid of their clothing so she could once and for all feel his bare skin against her own.

“Rey…” he panted, his head dipping to trail his tongue from her throat to the exposed skin of her chest. “You really must stop filling my head with your thoughts or I won’t be able to control myself.”

Rey’s hands clutched at his hair and she half-giggled, half-whimpered. She directed her gaze at the ceiling of the hangar, tears starting to stream down her cheeks. “The one time I wish you’d just let go…”

She felt him smile against the valley of her breasts, the irony of her words not lost on him. “I doubt you want the first time we fuck to be in front of the entire Engineering staff and a bunch of stormtroopers.” He raised his head to meet her gaze. There was a hint of sadness in his eyes.

_ You’re not ready _ , he spoke softly in her mind. _ We’re not ready _...

There was such honesty in his words, in the way he showed her how his self-control was hanging by a thread but his desire to make it something special for the two of them touched her deeply. 

She brought her fingers to trail across his beautiful lips before settling her hands on both sides of his face. She pulled him to her, her mouth giving him a slow kiss. He wrapped his arms tightly around her, drawing her into his embrace.

It lasted only a moment, a quiet solitude of two people comforting one another. But it was the closet she had ever felt to another human being.

Their lips parted and he immediately stepped back from her, carefully straightening his clothes. 

She reached up to touch her hair, feeling the mess he had made of her buns. She pulled the bands from her hair, letting it fall in waves about her shoulders. He made a sound and she turned to look at him.

He was gaping at her. She smiled, “What?”

He took a step towards her before stopping himself, his hands clenching into fists at his side. “You’re so beautiful, Rey.”

She felt herself blush. And then he let his train of thought flow through her and she gasped. He was picturing her naked, writhing against him, her hair spread against the mattress beneath her. 

“Never doubt my desire for you,” he choked out. “I struggle every day to hold myself in check when you are near.”

She swallowed, “You can be so cold.”

“I don’t mean to be… not with you. _ Never _with you...”

She didn’t know what to say. She looked down at her hands as they toyed with her hair bands.

His hand came to grip her chin, and he tilted her to look up at him. She hadn’t even been aware he closed the distance between them.

“If I was being cold minutes before, it is only because I thought you sought me out to plead your pilot’s case in having you on this mission.”

She opened her mouth to reply but he silenced her with a quick kiss.

“I know you don’t agree with my decision, Rey, but I do have my reasons. Let us not ruin the moment by fighting over it.”

She sighed then smiled softly before returning his kiss with one of her own.

“Now turn around so I can make you presentable,” he replied.

She did as she was told, a little surprised by his actions. He combed through her locks with his fingers, dividing the sections and carefully wrapping the three bands into their rightful place. When he was finished, his hands settled on her shoulders and he laid a small kiss at the base of her neck.

She turned in his embrace, her hands grabbing onto his tunic to stay his retreat. She fixed her gaze on his broad chest, concentrating on the lines of the fabric. “I don’t want this moment to end.” She buried her face against him, inhaling deep of his scent.

He brought his hand to caress the back of her neck as he laid a kiss into the softness of her hair. “We will have more, I assure you.”

She looked up at him, letting her chin rest against his chest. “Don’t lie to me…”

“I have never lied to you, Rey.”

She smiled. No, he had never lied...omitted facts, but never lied. “Kiss me.”

He leaned down, taking her lips in a gentle caress as his gloved hand cupped her cheek.

A loud clatter of metal hitting metal sounded and they both immediately pulled away from each other. Realizing it was only someone far away simply doing their job, they both chuckled. Suddenly the entire place filled with the sounds of mechanics and engineers working. It was like a bubble burst and they were no longer alone in their own little world. 

Kylo grabbed his pack of supplies from the floor. “We should get moving. The sooner we get through this mission, the sooner…”

“...you’ll take me to your bed?” Rey finished.

He paused and turned to give her an incredulous look.

Rey shrugged, moving to stand before him, “You know you can take whatever you want…”

“Rey…” Kylo breathed.

She took the pack from his hands, slinging it over her shoulder. “Shall we?” She slid her body dangerously close to his as she moved around him, delighting in the shudder that raked through him.

She left the shadows, coming around to the front of the TIE. She dumped his pack by the entrance to the cockpit. She smiled slightly as she felt him behind her; knew he watched her every move. She couldn’t help herself, bending over to give him a full display of her ass as she reached to rummage around in the pack, pretending to look for something...anything.

“_ Enough… _” he ground out, the words filling her mind. 

_ All right, _ she conceded, straightening. She turned to face him, “You never told me about this mystery training session you have planned. Will there be droids involved?”

He retrieved his pack and tossed it into his TIE. “Not this time.” He abruptly turned to face her, giving her a smirk as he added, “I thought my little Scavenger might like the change of scenery… feel the sun on her face…”

Her heart lurched in her chest at his words. He knew she longed to return to the planet life… to escape the twisted steel of the Finalizer. But, more importantly, he called her _ my _ Scavenger... _ His _…

She brought herself closer to him, but not enough to touch. “Well then, Supreme Leader, I’ll see you down there.”

He nodded his acknowledgement, “Rey.” 

She turned away from him then, but stopped in her tracks as he filled her head with scattered images of the two of them...his mouth on her breast; his tongue tracing over her belly button, the curve of her knee, the flesh of her thighs. She clenched her legs together instinctively, casting a heated look at him over her shoulder. He was busy prepping his ship, looking calm and wholly unaffected. But there was a hint of a grin on his face meant only for her.

_ You really are wicked, Ben _...she pushed the thought to him.

“_ Yes… and you rather like it _,” he replied.

She smiled, turning away and walking back to the Falcon. But it quickly faded as her eyes landed on Poe. He was leaning against the entrance of the Falcon, making it obvious he had been watching her and Kylo Ren.

“I see you and your Sith boyfriend have made amends,” he replied, his tone laced with irritation.

“Shut up, Poe.” She may not agree with Kylo refusing to allow her to join the mission, but she was tired of the way Poe had been acting. She pushed past him, entering the Falcon. He followed at her heels.

“What you choose to do with your life is your business,” he said.

“Yes, it is.” She seated herself in the pilot’s chair, desperate to ignore him.

“But you need to ask yourself, Rey, what sort of future could the two of you possibly have? Unless of course you’re planning on becoming a permanent member of the First Order.”

She turned to look at him, “I would never.”

“Does he know that?”

Rey opened her mouth to respond but nothing came out. She looked away, turning back to the controls of the ship. Movement outside the Falcon caught her attention. Kylo Ren was huddled together with Hux by the TIE. She swallowed as she watched what looked like a heated argument taking place between the two.

“How much do you even know about him, Rey?” Poe leaned in close to whisper.

She turned sharply, “Enough!”

Poe snapped back, feeling the brunt of her anger.

“I hope I’m not interrupting anything,” came Hux’s sardonic reply.

They both turned to see the ginger standing in the entrance of the Falcon. Gone was his crisp black uniform. The General was now dressed in black trousers, tall black boots, a grey shirt and black vest. 

“General, hardly recognized you. What is this, _ rogue sheik _?” Poe loved being a bit of an ass.

Hux sighed, straightening to his full height. “I just pictured how Rebel scum like yourself dressed then added a sense of style.”

Rose came bouncing into the ship at that moment, practically bumping into Hux. “Hi guys! Who’s the new recruit?” She stopped as she took in Hux’s appearance. “General Hux?!” she exclaimed.

Hux instantly turned a bright shade of pink. “No need to poke fun at me, mechanic.”

“I wouldn’t dare,” Rose replied sheepishly, suddenly swallowing nervously.

Rey and Poe exchanged a _ look _ then again watched as Hux and Rose tried to move around each other, both sliding right then left only to block each other’s paths.

“Ex-excuse me…” Hux fumbled. 

“S-s-sorry…” Rose replied.

“H-here, I’ll go this way,” Hux offered. He went to slide around her. “Try not to bite me…” 

Rose’s head snapped up, meeting his gaze. But he wasn’t being rude. He gave her a slight smile and she couldn’t help but return it.

“What the hell are you two doing?” Poe asked, interrupting them.

Hux glared at Poe, before whipping around in a huff and moving further into the ship.

Rose turned three shades of pink, obviously embarrassed. She too walked away from them.

Poe took the co-pilot’s seat next to Rey. Rey just stared at him.

“What?” Poe asked.

“Keep acting this way, and you’re not going to have many friends left,” Rey replied.

Poe just snorted his disdain.

******** 

Rey walked down the ramp of the Falcon, instantly turning her face towards the binary suns, feeling the warmth on her skin. She took a deep, cleansing breath of fresh air. How much she had missed this…

Poe pushed past her, interrupting her reverie. Even the pilot’s foul mood couldn’t ruin this for her. Two months on the Finalizer had definitely taken its toll. She craved the outdoors… the earth at her feet, the sun overhead. It was as if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders being here, on Paasana.

The trilling of music drifted faintly from the distance. Before she knew what she was about, her feet automatically carried her in its direction. She walked to the edge of the cliff’s rise. Down below she was greeted with a wondrous sight of colorful banners, parades of beings from all walks of life, trinket booths and the music… so much music and dancing. 

Rey smiled brightly. She had never seen any such thing in her entire life. It was nothing short of amazing. So much happening… everyone having fun… any prospect of war the furthest thing from their minds.

_ Ben would love this _… she thought. 

But as soon as the thought had formed, she knew it was a lie. She could stand here and try picturing Kylo Ren at the festival, but it would just be a waste of hopefulness. He would never be caught in such a place… never bring her here or to any other such event. He was Supreme Leader of the First Order, after all. 

Her chest tightened as reality seeped in. They would never be a normal couple. Even now, they hid their relationship from almost everyone, sneaking comfort from one another in the shadowy recesses of the docking bay.

She glanced at Poe. _ What future did they have, indeed? _

“Wow… it really is a sight to behold,” Rose remarked, joining Rey at the cliffside.

“This particular festival only happens every forty years,” Hux recited, coming to stand by Rose. “We are very lucky to have this opportunity to see it.”

Rey swallowed. Every forty years… Of course.

“It’s a shame we aren’t here to experience it...rather than meeting some mysterious dealer of artifacts,” Rose said wistfully.

“Perhaps the Pilot may spare us some time once we have finished…” Hux offered.

Rose turned a bright shade of pink, “Oh...uh…”

“The Scavenger could join us, as well…” Hux mumbled.

“Yes, I’m sure the Supreme Leader would be thrilled with all of us taking a small detour,” Rey remarked.

It was Hux’s turn to turn a deep shade of red that flamed up to the tips of his ears. He opened his mouth to reply but was interrupted by Poe.

“Rose! Hugs! Let’s move!” Poe barked.

Hux rolled his eyes but moved away from the women to follow the pilot.

Rose gave Rey a hug, “Stay out of trouble.”

“You too.”

“Rose!” Poe yelled again.

“All right!” Rose yelled back. She sighed, gave Rey’s hand a squeeze and turned to follow the men.

Rey watched the three walk away, wishing them a good journey though she knew in her heart of hearts, this was her mission. _ By the Force, let them be safe _ … she thought. _ Yes, even Hux _.

Rey seated herself on the Falcon’s ramp. She absently ran her hands through the grains of sand, letting it trickle through her fingers. She was reminded of Jakku and the innocence it represented. She had been lonely there, waiting for her family, but, nevertheless, content in the knowledge of never knowing what lay beyond the sand planet. She knew little of the First Order. The Force and Luke Skywalker...myths talked about around campfires. Not to mention she had never even heard of...

_ Kylo Ren _...

Again, her chest clenched, her heart squeezing. Rey groaned. Couldn’t she enjoy this brief moment of solitude without automatically thinking of his Supreme Leaderness?

The answer was a resounding _ No _.

She shot to her feet. She was tired of _ thinking _ so much. She snatched her lightsaber from her belt and walked to a cluster of rocks. She ignited it, swinging back and forth, the rocks her new foe. She tried Kylo’s backhand parry, his defensive overhanded blows. Soon she was swinging with renewed purpose, her motions faster and more precise. Then she spun on her toes, the Force making her lighter on her feet, her saber reversed in her hand as she struck wildly behind her.

Someone now stood there.

Rey stumbled backwards, falling on her backside in the sand, her saber dropping from her hand.

She looked up, expecting to see Kylo but instead there stood a mysterious figure, clothed in long, thick black robes, the body very feminine. The hood of the cowl was pulled tight over her head, shielding her features. 

Rey scrambled to her feet, grabbing her weapon but not igniting it. “Who are you?” she questioned.

Thin, pale hands emerged from the folds of the robe, the nails sharp and painted a blood red color. She carefully lifted her hood, letting it fall to her shoulders.

Rey gasped, instinctively taking a step back.

“Why, I’m you…” the Dark Rey hissed, baring sharp fangs. She smiled ruthlessly, “Well, that is, the more _ fun _ version of you…”

“You’re not real.”

Dark Rey looked offended. “I am as real as you are…”

Rey ignited her saber, “Prove it.”

Dark Rey rolled her eyes. She reached into the folds of her cloak, withdrawing a crude, makeshift saber, similar in appearance to Kylo’s own. She ignited it. It expanded in her hand, producing two blades of red fire on opposite ends. 

Dark Rey screeched, lunging at Rey. Rey blocked the attacked, her blade connecting with Dark Rey’s own blade, the familiar sizzle sounding from the contact. Rey stepped back from the vision before her. 

The two Reys circled each other, their gazes locked. This time, Rey initiated, swinging at the other woman with all the power of the Force driving her blade. She only hit empty air, stumbling forward into nothingness. The other Rey suddenly vanishing.

Rey whirled around, desperately searching for the other woman but to no avail.

She looked down at the saber in her hand, her breath coming in rapid puffs of air.

“Join us…” Dark Rey whispered into her left ear.

Rey jumped back, bringing her saber up defensively. There stood Dark Rey, the blue glow giving her pale skin and dark eyes a haunted look.

“Never,” Rey replied.

“We’ll see…” Dark Rey bit out.

Dark Rey swiped at Rey. She stepped back once… twice… whipping her saber to counterattack the woman’s incoming blows. And that’s when she felt it...the warmth in her chest...growing, sliding against her skin, inside and out. _ Kylo _…

“Here comes your Prince,” Dark Rey hissed. She ran her hand down the length of her body, seductively touching her breasts, her stomach, her thighs as she said, “Let’s kill him together.”

“No!” Rey yelled.

“Pity…” Dark Rey disengaged her saber staff, taking a step back from Rey. “Because he’s coming to kill you.”

Suddenly the woman vanished. She was there one second, gone the next… leaving no trace she had ever been there at all.

Rey fell to her knees in the sand, her hands coming to cover her ears. Was she going crazy?

She took a few gulping breaths, calling the Force to her...surrounding herself with it, calming her heartbeat, evening her breath.

The warmth inside her grew hotter and she knew Kylo was close. She dragged herself to her feet, searching for his ship. Off in the distance, his TIE glinted brightly under the suns, flying very low over the empty vast of desert landscape… low but coming very fast.

Rey, transfixed by the vision of his ship, walked towards the center of the desert. She reached out to him through the Force but was greeted with only a dark, empty void. He had closed himself off to her. She tested their Bond. Again, she found only darkness.

_ Run her down _…

One single thought slipped from his mind, entering Rey’s. Panic seized her in that moment. Was she trapped in another nightmare? Did she nod off on the Falcon after the team departed?

_ Run her down _…

He was almost here, the TIE picking up speed as he caught her in his line of sight.

This was no nightmare. This was happening.

Anger filled Rey. He was using her fear of him against her… making her relive one of her worst nightmares from the past year. Nightmare… or had it been a vision?

What did it matter anymore.

Rey clutched tightly at the lightsaber at her side. She ignited it. Kylo’s words echoed in her mind, “_ Take your anger and turn it into power _…”

She stared at his ship careening towards her. She took a breath, releasing it slowly. She turned away from his ship, crouching down in her stance. She could feel him… so close.

She broke out in a run, the TIE licking at her heels like the fires from the pits of Mustafar. She pulled on the Force, suddenly catapulting herself into the air, her body moving naturally against time and space, flipping up and over the TIE fighter. She closed her eyes, letting herself simply feel the moment.

There was no mistaking the ear splitting noise of steel being shredded as her saber cut through the metal of his ship’s wing.

Rey landed in a crouched position onto the softness of the sand, releasing the breath she hadn’t been aware she was holding. She held her position for the space of a heartbeat, a deafening silence enveloping her.

A loud sound broke through her concentration. She stood, turning just in time to see the TIE skittering across the desert, careening for the rocky edifice of the nearest cliff.

“No!” Rey screamed, her hand immediately raising, the Force flowing through her as she tried to stop the ship. 

He had been going too fast and it was too much for her. She reached deep into her mind then, finding a memory so raw from which to pull her anger. She pictured Han Solo, the blade of Kylo’s saber slicing through him. Even with his last breath, he reached for Ben, touched his face, hoping that his lost son would one day find his way back to the light. 

Rey screamed her rage. She grabbed hold of the TIE, yanking it to a stop just in the nick of time. Smoke poured from its cracked wing.

Someone emerged from the billowy tendrils of smoke. A figure clothed in dark robes, a red, gleaming saber staff in her hands. Her maniacal laugh filled Rey’s head.

Rey closed her eyes for a moment, willing her away. She opened them, and Dark Rey had vanished. Then she ran over to the TIE.

Kylo pulled himself from the cockpit just as Rey closed the distance. He was clothed in full Kylo Ren gear, his mask firmly in place. He dusted himself off before meeting her gaze.

“You’re going to have to explain this mess to my mechanics,” he replied. His attempt at the joke was lost in the neutralized voice of his mask.

Rey clenched her teeth in seething anger, “What the hell did you do that for?!”

Kylo reared back, clearly surprised at her tone. “Why, Rey, that’s not anger I sense in you, is it?”

“I cannot talk to you when you’re wearing that stupid mask! Take it off!”  
  


Kylo’s hand involuntarily moved to rest on the hilt of his lightsaber. “No.”

She ignited her saber, “Take it off! Or I will do it for you!”

Kylo tilted his head to the side, studying her for a moment, before replying, “I’d like to see you try.”

Rey didn’t hesitate. Flipping her saber in her hand, she took a backhanded swipe at him. Kylo stepped back, dodging the blow. She advanced on him, her swings strong and precise, driving him to retreat from her, giving him no time to grab his own saber to defend himself.

She didn’t back down, coming at him fiercely until he stumbled back from her. Driven by her anger she struck out at him, slicing up and across, scarring his mask on the left side, giving him a matching mark to the one from StarKiller base.

He grabbed his lightsaber now, igniting it and blocking her next blow. Using all his might, he shoved her back. It was her turn to stumble away from him. He stood, advancing on her, reigning overhead blows, their sabers crackling from the impact. 

Rey quickly scrambled away. She knew she was nothing against his strength but his speed was something else entirely. She climbed the TIE, taking the high ground. He struck at her, but his blade collided with only metal, marking his ship. He climbed the ship, slower than she. She distanced herself from him but suddenly he was there, almost on top of her. She blocked his next blow, grabbing onto the Force to shove him back. She jumped off the front of the TIE, landing in the sand. He quickly followed, his fall landing harder than her’s.

She broke out in a run, heading for the rock formations ahead. He stalked after her. He was getting tired; she could feel it.

And he was in pain. The leg he had wounded in the battle with the Empire beginning to throb. It was enough to give her pause… until he swung violently at her. She ducked, his blade hitting the rock. Then she did something she would never forgive herself for. She kicked him in his injured leg. He fell to one knee.

She took the opportunity to use the rock as a jumping off point, leaping to the next formation, getting away from him. It took him a few extra moments to pull himself to his feet. Despite the pain, he followed her, choosing to move around the rocks to greet her on the other side. He used his height to his advantage, swinging at her feet. She jumped up to avoid his blow. He swung again. This time when she jumped, she slipped off the edge, falling backwards off the rock.

He caught her with the Force before she hit the ground. She landed in a crouched position. 

She shrugged, “Thanks.”

He gave her a curt nod before attacking her with another overhead blow. She grabbed onto the Force, stopping his saber in mid air. She swung at him, but he, too, locked her saber with the Force.

They both stood there for the space of several heartbeats before releasing their holds simultaneously. They each took a step back from each other, their breathing sharp and quick. They circled each other.

“Take off the mask!” Rey yelled.

“And why would I do that when I’m obviously winning?” Kylo replied.

Rey attacked, her saber clashing against his. He counterattacked, which she too blocked. Back and forth, they each struck out at the other, with neither gaining the upper hand.

Kylo flipped his saber around, swiping at Rey with more precision than strength. He caught her fingers then, causing her to cry out. She stepped back, shaking her hand in pain.

He approached, striking at her again. This one she barely caught in time, countering the blow but losing her balance at the same time. She landed on one knee. He moved to strike overhead, but at the last moment, Rey grabbed at The Force, yanking Kylo’s feet from under him. He landed on his back, hard, the breath being knocked out of him.

Rey scrambled on top of him, straddling his waist, using her shins to pin his forearms to the ground.

Her breathing rapid, she looked down at Kylo. He lay there, not fighting her in any way.

“I win,” she whispered.

Kylo released his grip on his saber. It disengaged and fell into the sand. He easily yanked his arms free of her, causing her to slide further down his body. He grabbed her waist, digging his gloved fingers into her flesh. He thrust his hips up, grinding his hardened member against the apex of her thighs. 

_ By the Force, he was aroused! _

Rey cried out, becoming aware of how wet she was where their bodies were pressed together. A strange feeling bloomed low in her belly. She closed her eyes, biting her lip as she gave into the feeling, the anger and hatred being replaced with something else...something akin to _ desire _.

“I think I won this round, Scavenger.”

She opened her eyes, releasing a shaky breath. She disengaged her saber, tossing it aside. She rested her hands on the plane of his stomach, supporting herself as she thrust down, pumping her hips against his.

Kylo groaned, his grip tightening on her waist as his head fell back into the sand.

Rey looked at him. He lifted his head to meet her gaze. Cautiously, she reached for his mask. Kylo reared back for a moment. She heard him swallow. He released his hold on her, pushing himself up on his forearms. He gave a brief nod.

She reached for him again. Her hands settled on each side of the mask. She felt for the mechanism, finding it below each ear, pushing it. With a sound of rushing air and a mechanical whirr, the mask released. Rey pulled it off.

Kylo shook out his hair, the locks sweaty from their recent fight. He didn’t meet her gaze, his eyes focused strictly on her bosom.

Rey clutched the mask to her chest as she reached one finger towards him, the tip tracing the edge of the scar etched down the right side of his face. Kylo shuddered, his breath shaky.

She tossed the mask to the side, grabbing at his face and pulling him towards her. Their lips locked, their mouths opening, their tongues dancing against each other.

*****

Kylo ripped open the cockpit door to his TIE, shoving Rey into the ship. He had barely made it inside before Rey was on him again, pawing at his clothes. She ripped at his belt while he fumbled with her tunic.

She brought her mouth to his, biting his lower lip before caressing the pain away with the roughness of her tongue.

He moaned against her lips, giving her a hard, bruising kiss. She responded with a whimper, her hands frantically pulling at his tunic now.

He pulled her hands away from him, much to her chagrin. He whipped her around, pinning her hands against the wall of the ship, their fingers interlocking. He brought his body flush against her, his shaft pressing into the roundness of her buttocks. He thrust against her, the hardness of his body instinctively reacting to her softness. Refusing him complete control of the situation, she pushed back, grinding against him.

“Fuck!” He buried his face in the crook of her neck, “Rey…” he gasped, “We’re really fucking doing this.”

She yanked free of him and whirled around to face him. She reached for him, her hand running through his locks. She gripped his hair hard and pulled him down to her. But she didn’t kiss him. Her tongue darted out teasingly, tracing over his full, pouty lips before playfully nipping at him.

He tried to kiss her but she moved out of the way. Slowly backing up further into the ship, she proceeded to remove her tunic, followed by her breast band. Her breasts sprang free, soft and lush, the pink of her nipples hardening instantly.

Kylo growled, stalking towards her. She practically ran from him, but he caught her easily enough, the benefit of the tight space in a small ship. He pulled her back into his embrace, his hands covering her breasts, squeezing, the leather of his gloves rough against the soft skin. It was more than enough to elicit a gasp from Rey.

She pulled his hands away and turned in his arms. She shoved him… hard. The backs of his legs hit the bunk and he tumbled onto the mattress. Rey climbed on top of him, straddling his thighs.

“Take me into your mouth,” she ordered.

Kylo pushed himself halfway up, his mouth greedily finding her nipple. He drew the sensitive peak between his teeth, his tongue rolling over the flesh before he started to suck. Rey cried out. He moved to the next breast, repeating the action.

Rey began to move against him, her hips twisting and grinding against his hardened shaft, begging for release in the confines of his trousers. The friction of their hips combined with his wondrous mouth on her made her pant with pleasure.

“Kylo…” she moaned.

“Rey.” He held her hips in place as he thrust against her.

Rey’s hands strayed beneath his tunic and shirt, her nails raking down his bare flesh.

Kylo cringed from the pain. By the Force, this was not the Rey he knew. This woman knew what she wanted and was taking it. It both thrilled and scared him.

Kylo dragged his mouth away from the temptation that were her breasts. He tried to meet her gaze. Her eyes were closed, her hips picking up tempo against his member. He willed her to look at him, the string of their Bond tightening in response.

She stopped moving, opening her eyes. Relief settled over him. There was a passionate haze there in her hazel gaze, but also the warmth and kindness he had come to crave. She was still _ his _ Rey.

“Rey…” he whispered.

“Kylo…” she replied, her hand caressing his scarred cheek tenderly.

“What the hell?!” came a third voice.

Both Rey and Kylo turned to see Finn standing in the doorway of the TIE.

Finn cringed, averting his gaze. “I saw the smoke and wanted to make sure you two were…” His voice trailed off. He covered his eyes, “I’m never going to unsee this!” He turned and immediately left the TIE.

Rey and Kylo didn’t move. Both were breathing rapidly, clearly out of breath.

Then Rey slowly slid off Kylo’s lap onto the mattress, pulling her legs to her chest, burying her face against her knees.

“Oh my god…” she cried.

Kylo reached for her but she pulled away.

“I need you to leave,” she replied.

It was like being hit with an ice cold bucket of water. Kylo swallowed then rose from the bunk.

“Rey…” he started, clearly a glutton for punishment.

“Get out!” she yelled.

Kylo didn’t hesitate, immediately stepping from the room.

*******

Rey sat cross legged on a large rock, staring at the vast barren desert before her, her face wet from tears she had cried. The suns were close to setting now, casting dark shadows from the rocky cliffs across the sand.

She half listened to the sounds behind her - wrenching metal and twisting screws, punctuated by the occasional slew of curses from Kylo. After the _ incident _, he and Finn had worked together to drag the wounded TIE closer to where the Falcon sat. She refused to look or speak to either of them, taking position on her rock and flat out ignoring any attempts they made to communicate with her. Well, any attempts Finn had made, that is. 

Kylo was doing his best to stay away from Rey at the moment. She suspected he only wanted the TIE close to the Falcon in the event she tried to suddenly escape from him. And though she was tempted with the prospect… very tempted… she knew it would all be in vain for he’d just hunt her down and drag her back.

She hated him. He had ripped from her mind her deepest vulnerabilities and turned them against her, manipulating the anger and resentment she tried so hard to conceal and forget. Quite simply put, he wanted her to be like him – so broken and alone, someone easily controlled… a darker version of herself. She cringed inwardly as she remembered the vision of Dark Rey, clearly the Force’s distorted way of warning her of what was to come.

“I have never tried to control you, Rey,” he voiced from behind her.

She laughed mirthlessly, “Can’t you please just stay out of my head?!”

He sighed, returning to his work on the ship. Silence enveloped them for several minutes.

“Is this how it always must be between us?” she asked, “The two of us trying to kill each other in-between stolen moments of hate-filled passion?” She began to cry again, and she dashed at the tears with the back of her hand.

“You asked me to teach you. This is the only way I know how.”

She stood, whirling around to face him, “You violated my mind! You stole my worst fears and turned them into reality, and for what? To get a rise out of me? Or were you just trying to make fucking me more interesting?”

He reared back, stung by her words. “I did it to push you! To show you your true potential! You’re so blinded by your _ feelings _ for me that you hold yourself back.”

The way he said feelings… like the very word was so disgusting to him.

He continued, “The power you are capable of…”

“Power?! This isn’t about power for me! I’m trying to be the very best possible version of myself without losing everything that I am! And how dare you try to use my feelings for you against me!”

“You’re feelings for Ben Solo, you mean.” He scoffed, turning away from her. He leaned one hand on his ship, the other rubbing the stress from his forehead.

Rey sniffled. “Sadly, had this been the only thing you had done, I could have possibly forgiven you. But the worst part of it all was that you didn’t even trust me enough to tell me about your secret plan with Finn.”

He looked at her over his shoulder, meeting her tearful gaze.

“I have given you everything I am, but you still choose to hide behind your Supreme Leader mask and title. You keep me at arm’s length, picking and choosing which parts of your life I may be _ allowed _ to be part of…”

He pushed himself away from the TIE, taking two long strides towards her. “Are you seriously lecturing me about our relationship? You’re a fucking tease, Rey! You’re either climbing all over me or pushing me away because your friends might notice their precious Jedi actually _ likes _ to tread on the dark side. And for the record, Finn and the Stormtroopers are here for our protection… a backup plan in case your pilot friend screws this up.”

She snorted her disdain, “Their very presence endangers the lives of the team! You would know that if you even tried just once to listen to any of us!”

She retreated a step from him. “You are selfish, Kylo Ren…arrogant, cruel and, above all else, a coward.”

He took a menacing step towards her, “You’re forgetting one thing. I’m also a monster.”

Rey released a shuddering breath, her eyes again filling with tears. Quickly she turned away from him, refusing to let him see her cry. 

She felt him grow near even though his approach was quiet. Cautiously he wrapped his arms around her, hugging her against his hard chest.

It would be so easy to just give in again… to allow him to comfort her. 

But no, all it would do is send him the wrong message. She pulled out of his grip.

“Don’t touch me,” she whispered.

The light drained from his eyes as his arms fell to his sides, his hands clenching into fists. She had wounded him. She could feel it pierce his very soul only a moment before he closed himself off to her.

“As you wish,” was all he said, before he turned and walked away from her.

******

Rey was hiding in the Millennium Falcon when the team returned some time later. By the looks on their faces, it was certain the negotiations had failed for the Jedi Holocron.

“They’ll only turn it over to the last Jedi herself,” Poe replied. “The irony is, they’re afraid it will fall into the hands of the First Order.”

Rey chanced a glance over at Kylo. He hadn’t joined the team upon their return, choosing to remain by his TIE, an outsider simply listening in.

“Di-did they suspect you were working with the First Order?” Rey questioned, her gaze falling on Hux.

“Don’t blame me! I wasn’t even allowed into the meeting,” Hux exclaimed.

“They didn’t let on they had any knowledge of our little _ arrangement _,” Poe replied.

Rey turned to Poe, “Do you think they’ll agree to meet with me?”

Poe nodded, “I do… if we go now.”

Rey again looked at Kylo. He met her gaze but said nothing. He crossed his arms in defiance and leaned against his ship.

Keeping her eyes on Kylo, she replied, “Then it’s settled. Poe and I will go back to the dealer and negotiate for the holocron.”

“Do you really think that’s a smart idea, Rey? I mean, what if these people just want the last Jedi…” Rose replied. 

“It’s our only option. Besides, I can take care of myself.” She gave Rose a pat on her arm. Rose met Hux’s gaze, exchanging a worried look with him.

Rey grabbed her staff from the Falcon before quickly rejoining Poe’s side. She half expected Kylo to try and stop her, and she readied herself for the verbal altercation.

But Kylo did not move from his position, his attention now refocused on his ship. 

“Let’s go,” Rey said. She followed Poe, forcing herself to keep her eyes fixed straight ahead and not look back to see if Kylo was watching them.

Kylo grabbed a wrench from the toolbox and gave his complete attention to the broken wing of the TIE. He heard Hux clear his throat from behind him.

“What do you need, Hux?” he bit out.

“Supreme Leader, I feel it’s my duty to inform you I think the Scavenger is walking into a trap. The pilot friend of hers does not seem to have her best interests at heart.” 

Kylo snorted. “You heard her. She can take care of herself.”

“Be that as it may…” Hux paused before taking a few steps toward Kylo, “Ren, he refused to allow us to enter the rendezvous point. He’s hiding something. Do you not care?”

Kylo shrugged, “Not really…no.”

“I find that hard to believe,” Rose replied, joining the conversation. Kylo stopped what he was doing and turned to look at the small mechanic.

“I’ve known Poe a long time; he can be brash and a bit of an ass but lately… lately he hasn’t been himself. I’m worried he may do something stupid,” said Rose.

Kylo shook his head. “If I go running in there based on your hunch and ruin our chances of obtaining the holocron, Rey will never speak to me again. We’ll have to wait it out.”

Rose sighed, “You two are such fools over each other.”

“Agreed,” came Hux’s response.

Rose turned her attention to the TIE fighter now, “And what the hell happened to my baby?!”

*******

The delightful smells of the festival surrounded Rey as she and Poe arrived at the edge of the city limits. It brought a warm smile to her face, which didn’t go unnoticed by the pilot.

“Careful Rey. Wouldn’t want you to accidentally enjoy yourself. Heard the First Order will throw you into the Brig for such an offense.”

Rey gave Poe a _ look _ but the pilot just smiled.

“I...I’ve just never seen anything like it,” Rey replied wistfully.

Poe’s smile wavered, “I’m sorry, Rey.”

Rey shrugged, “It could’ve been worse…”

“No… I mean for everything… for the way I’ve been acting. I keep thinking if Leia was here…” His voice trailed off.

“I know… me too.”

Poe gave her a tight smile. “Go… have a look around. I’ll find the dealer, arrange a meeting.”

“We should stick together.”

“Go have a little fun, Rey. You deserve it.”

Rey considered his words. The music trickled from the festival. Like the pied piper, it called to her. As if on cue, the last bit of light from the suns disappeared over the horizon. The entire festival suddenly roared to life as a million twinkling lights were lit. Rey’s breath caught as she saw the beautiful sight before her.

She wandered forward, lost in the sudden magic of it all. She stopped, thrusting her staff at Poe. “Hold this for me.”

He chuckled, “As you wish.”

Rey froze at his words, a chill running down her spine. 

“You okay, Rey?” Poe questioned. He laid a tender hand on her shoulder.

Rey swallowed, “Yes. Fine. Shall I meet you back here?”

“I’ll find you…” he replied, giving her a playful wink.

Rey gave him a tight smile, casually slipping out from under his touch. She couldn’t help but feel like she was being dishonest to Kylo Ren, being here with Poe. Then she thought about their last conversation and quickly pushed those feelings deep into the back of her mind.

_ Fuck Kylo Ren _, she thought as she ventured off into the festival. And a small part of her hoped he had heard her.

Rey drifted aimlessly through the streets, marveling at all the sights and sounds enveloping her. But the smells… the smells made her mad with delight. 

She followed her nose to a large stand filled with gloriously sugary delights that made her mouth water. She perused the offerings, settling on a pastry covered in chocolate and granulated cinnamon sugar. She quickly paid, staring at the large pastry in her hand. She told herself she’d only take a few bites then save the rest to share with Rose later. She bit into the warm, buttery bread. 

Three minutes later, she was licking the remains of chocolate and sugar from the tips of her fingers, having devoured the entire thing. She was sure she had made plenty of yummy sounds while eating it too. Once they were finished with the dealer, she would make Poe bring her back here so she could grab one for Rose. Yes, that would assuage her guilt, surely.

Rey carefully looked around, memorizing the location so she could easily find it again. It was then another booth caught her eye. She pushed through the crowd, coming to the small stall decorated in sheaths of color cloth. Beautifully handcrafted jewelry was laid out on the table and hung on hooks all around. A young Aki-Aki girl stood shyly off to the side.

Rey wiped her hands on the side of her pants before letting her fingers drift over the shiny wooden beads and trinkets.

“Did you make these?” she questioned the young girl.

The young girl nodded.

“They’re very beautiful….” Rey replied, giving her a sweet smile. Rey turned her attention back to the jewelry. They were all so unique. But one in particular drew her eye. It was a yellow beaded necklace, decorated with husks shaped like the Aki-Aki. Rey couldn’t explain it but she felt strangely connected to this piece. Perhaps it was just her being lost in her feelings after the strange events of the day or maybe she just wanted something as a reminder of the festival…

Rey sighed, an empty void of loneliness creeping into her heart. Maybe it was just nostalgia… Rey simply wanting to give the teenage Aki-Aki attention, from one desert girl to another.

The girl picked up the necklace and thrust it at Rey, speaking to her in her native tongue. 

“I-I don’t understand…” Rey replied.

“She wants you to have it,” came a familiar voice from behind her.

Rey froze, her blood running cold at the voice. Slowly, she turned around, her hand instinctively reaching for her lightsaber as she came face to face with Unkar Plutt, her one-time slaver on Jakku.

Plutt threw his hands up in defense, “Easy girl… I mean you no harm.”

Rey’s grip tightened on the saber, “You sent out a holo offering money to anyone willing to capture me and return me to Jakku!”

The color drained from Plutt’s already pale, disgusting face. “A misunderstanding… surely…” He took a step towards her.

Rey grabbed her saber, igniting it, “If you so much as touch me…” she bit out.

“Relax, girl. I’m not here for you.” But Plutt took a few steps back from Rey any way.

Rey disengaged her saber but held it tight in her grip. “Why are you here?”

“Enjoying the festival… that is all.” Plutt swallowed.

“You mean looking for other younglings to kidnap into slavery?” Rey questioned, eyeing Plutt carefully.

“N-no… I’m out of that business. I swear it.”

Rey took a deep breath, releasing it slowly. “You better be speaking the truth.”

“I-I am. The money I made off your debt was more than enough to let me retire from the business…”

“What?!”

Plutt’s eyes grew wide. “Your debt, girl...it was paid in full. I assumed you knew.”

Rey felt like the breath had been knocked out of her. Her mouth fell open in surprise, her stomach clenching. Did her parents finally return for her? 

“Wh-when? Wh-who?” she stammered, tears suddenly welling behind her eyes.

“Some besotted, young fool of a man...3, maybe 4 months ago. He was asking questions about you. I told him you was my property and if he knew where you were it was my right by the law of the First Order to have you returned…”

Rey’s heart stopped beating in her chest, constricting painfully in her breast. “A young man?”

“Paid for your freedom ten fold. I tried telling him you weren’t worth it but he wouldn’t listen.”

“Wh-what did he look like?” Rey managed to ask, knowing the answer even before Plutt could speak it into truth.

“Tall fella… with a nasty scar down the right side of his face…”

Rey gasped, a choked sob escaping her.

_ Kylo Ren _…

Rey closed her eyes, her heart starting to beat frantically in her chest. Kylo had bought her freedom… long before the truce… before the bond had reopened. He freed her...and never asked for anything in return.

For all his misguidedness.. for all his flaws… _ this _ was an act of pure kindness…

And he had never mentioned it.

_ You’re a monster. _

_ Yes I am _.

She had treated him so cruelly.

Plutt thrusted the necklace at her, bringing her back to the present. “Take it, girl. She’s gifting it to you. Says it will bring you luck.”

Rey mechanically reached for the necklace, taking it. She stared blindly at it, her heart and soul filled with regret.

“Daft girl,” Plutt mumbled as he ambled off into the crowd.

_ The belonging you seek isn’t behind you. It is ahead _….

Maz’s words never made sense until this very moment.

“I have been so blind…” Rey whispered.

The girl gave her a sympathetic look, saying something in her language. 

Rey swallowed, fishing into her pocket for money. She pressed it into the girl’s hands. But the girl shook her head no.

“Please… take it,” Rey pleaded.

The girl looked at the money then up at Rey, her eyes filling with unshed tears. She said something, then turned her attention to the racks of jewelry. She quickly scanned over the display, finding what she was looking for. She unhooked it and handed it to Rey.

Rey looked at the bracelet. It was a simple circle of yellowish wooden beads… a perfect match to the necklace. 

The girl pressed her hand to Rey’s heart. “Love,” she said. She took Rey’s hand with the bracelet and pressed it to Rey’s heart, “For love…”

Rey’s heart clenched and a tear slipped down her cheek. _ For Kylo, _ she thought.

Rey gave the girl a hug, thanking her. Then she quickly hurried off. She had to get back to the Falcon. Her mind immediately conjured Kylo’s face… the hurt and pain she had seen there when she told him not to touch her. She broke out in a run, the tears coming fast and hard. She was in such a hurry, she didn’t even realize she passed Poe.

“Rey!” Poe yelled after her.

But she couldn’t stop. She had to get back to Kylo. Nothing else mattered.

Poe grabbed her arm, yanking on her. She whirled on him, “Let me go!”

Poe released her. “Rey.. what happened?”

“I..” Rey wasn’t sure what to say. She looked down at the jewelry clutched in her fist. “I have to go. I don’t have time to explain.” She turned away from Poe.

“This is about _ him _, isn’t it?” Poe demanded.

Rey cringed at Poe’s words. “I know you don’t understand.” She paused before adding, “I broke something, Poe. And I need to fix it.”

She didn’t wait for him to respond. She started to walk away. A sharp pain split Rey’s head. She stumbled forward before she fell to the ground. Her entire world suddenly went black.

Poe came to stand over Rey’s unconscious body, her staff in his hand. “I’m sorry, Rey, but I just can’t let you do that.”

******

Kylo stood crouched beneath the TIE, the weight of the ship resting on his broad shoulders. He pushed with all his strength, lifting it off the ground.

“Perfect,” Rose replied. “Don’t move.”

Kylo gave Rose a _ look _ as he released a shuddering breath. It went unnoticed by the mechanic. She was focused on the TIE’s wing now, standing under the ship, assessing the damage.

“Couldn’t you just..I don’t know, use the Force to hold up the ship?” Hux asked. He was seated on the ramp of the Falcon, watching Kylo and Rose.

“The Force isn’t to be used for personal gain… especially when brute strength works just as well,” Kylo bit out.

Hux cocked an eyebrow, “Really Ren?”

“You know, you could try helping us, Armitage,” Rose replied from under the ship.

Kylo reared back in surprise, “Armitage?”

Hux scoffed at Rose, ignoring Kylo. “And get my clothes dirty?”

Rose smiled, “That’s the thing about dirt… washes right off.”

Hux smirked but when he caught Kylo’s questioning gaze, he replaced it with his usual stern expression.

“Hand me the auxiliary wrench, will you?” Rose called out.

“She’s talking to you, _ Armitage… _” Kylo said.

Hux rolled his eyes at Kylo before searching for the tool Rose asked for. He grabbed what he thought was it and took it to her.

“No, the auxiliary wrench…” she replied, her attention focused on the wing.

Hux grabbed a different tool, holding it out to her.

“No, the one shaped like star..”

Hux held up another. 

“The one next to that one.”

“This?” Hux asked.

“Uh, no, I need the half quarter one…”

Hux tried again.

“No. Look where I am pointing,” Rose replied.

Hux stared at the array of tools, confused.

“It’s a star shape,” she reiterated.

“They are all star shaped!” Hux exclaimed.

“For fuck’s sake!” Kylo bellowed. He reached out his hand and grabbed the wrench with the Force, smacking Hux in the chest with it. “That one!”

“Ah. Well, why didn’t you just say so…” Hux said. He handed the tool to Rose with a smile.

“Thanks, Armitage.”

Kylo rolled his eyes, “What the hell is happening here?”

Both Hux and Rose looked at him, turning a deep shade of red.

“Nothing,” they replied in unison.

Hux turned away and sat back down by the Falcon. Rose returned to her work.

“Okay. You can set her down,” she said a few minutes later.

Kylo slowly lowered himself to the ground, rolling out from beneath the TIE. He came over to inspect Rose’s work.

“Should hold until we get her back to the Finalizer,” Rose added.

“Thank you, Rose,” Kylo said sincerely.

Rose blushed deep. “My pleasure, Supreme Leader.”

Hux scoffed, “You never thank me for a job well done.”

“I don’t like you,” Kylo shrugged.

“The feeling is mutual, Ren,” Hux bowed his head in mock respect.

“Stop, you two. You don’t mean it,” Rose admonished them. She began picking up the tools. Hux hurriedly stood and started doing it for her.

Kylo crossed his arms over his wide chest and watched Hux with interest. “You know she has a boyfriend, right?”

Hux stopped what he was doing and opened his mouth to respond but no words came out. His whole face was pink with embarrassment. He resumed cleaning up for Rose.

Rose looked at Kylo and mouthed the word, “Stop…”

Kylo shrugged, growing bored with the situation. He walked away from the two of them, going over to the edge of the rocky summit to look out at the festival.

Rose watched Kylo before meeting with Hux’s gaze. “Go talk to him,” she whispered.

“And say what?” Hux asked.

“He’s worried about Rey. As am I. Shouldn’t they have been back by now?”

“They’re probably out enjoying the festival,” Hux grumbled.

Rose shook her head. “I don’t think so.”

Kylo walked to the Falcon now, taking a seat on the ramp. Rose went over and joined him.

“So, tell me, how did you two meet?” Rose asked, trying hard to distract the two men.

Kylo just grunted. He leaned back, resting on his forearms. “Why don’t you tell her, _ Armitage _?”

Hux opened his mouth to say something rude when he caught Rose’s pleading look. He rolled his eyes. He walked over and leaned against the Falcon. “We were both under Snoke’s tutelage,” he replied.

Kylo snorted, “We were his lackeys, you mean.”

“Same difference,” Hux said.

“You both hated Snoke,” Rose determined.

Now both men grunted in agreement.

“See? You two already have that in common…” Rose tried.

“How many times did you try to kill me, Armitage?” Kylo asked.

“One less than you tried to kill me, _ Ben _,” Hux answered. “Which is why you’re the Supreme Leader and I am not.”

Kylo shot to his feet in one quick movement, grabbing onto the Force, choking Hux. “Never call me by that name…” he bit out.

Rose came to her feet. She grabbed Kylo’s hand and yanked it down, breaking his hold and shocking the large man, “Enough of that.”

Hux bent over, coughing as he struggled to regain his breath. Rose patted him on the shoulders, “And you quit trying to egg him on.”

Rose took her seat. She grabbed the edge of Kylo’s tunic and pulled him down to sit. She patted the space on the other side of her, signaling for Hux to take a seat. Surprisingly he did, carefully keeping an eye on Kylo.

“You two fight like brothers,” Rose chided them.

“No we don’t!” they protested in unison.

It was Rose’s turn to roll her eyes. “You fight just like me and my sister Paige do… did…” Rose’s hand absently went to the necklace around her neck, fiddling the charm. 

“She died?” Hux asked.

“Last year…” Rose answered.

Kylo stared at Rose for the space of a heartbeat, “She was in the bomber that took down the Dreadnought.”

Rose gave him a surprised look.

Hux reached around and smacked Kylo on the shoulder, “Stop reading her mind.”

Kylo shot him a _ look _, his hand clenched into a fist. Rose’s hand covered Kylo’s, “No,” she replied. It took a moment, but slowly Kylo relaxed, his hand coming to rest on his knee.

“I don’t blame the First Order… not anymore. It was war.” Rose said.

“I’m tired of war…” Kylo answered absently. 

“Me too,” Hux agreed. He met Kylo’s surprised look and shrugged. “I wasn’t always a General, you know. My mother was a kitchen maid. Sometimes I miss the normalcy of it all.”

“Armitage Hux, careful… you sound almost human,” Rose gave him a playful nudge.

Hux blushed, smiling shyly.

“Yes and I was Prince of Alderaan,” Kylo huffed. He pushed himself to his feet, crossing his arms over his chest. He leaned back against the Falcon, propping the bottom of one foot against it. “It doesn’t matter. Peace is a lie our parents told us so we would sleep as children. There will always be the next fight. Even if the First Order fell tomorrow, there will just be another villainous group waiting to take its place. It’s an endless cycle.”

“He’s right,” Hux sighed.

“Then what are we fighting for?” Rose questioned sadly.

“So there will be a tomorrow…” Hux replied.

“I like that,” Rose smiled at him.

Kylo stood there, gazing out into the night sky. He really was tired… tired of war… tired of fighting. He’s been battling since he was ten… first at Skywalker’s school then with the Knights of Ren. He’d give everything he had to finally lay down his lightsaber… perhaps find a nice island somewhere far out in the Outer Rim… someplace green with a nice view of the ocean.

_ For Rey _…

Kylo doubled over suddenly, a sharp pain cutting through his abdomen. He felt the breath rush out of his lungs in a whoosh.

Rose and Hux jumped to their feet. “Kylo!” Rose exclaimed.

Kylo’s head snapped up. “Rose, your datapad,” he ground out through clenched teeth.

“I’ll get it,” Hux replied. He ran up the ramp into the Falcon, quickly returning with it. He handed it to Rose.

She quickly scanned over the information. “E-everything is fine,” she said. “All the vitals are good.”

Kylo straightened, “Something is wrong.” He swallowed past the lump forming in his throat, “I can’t feel Rey.”

Rose was confused. “What are you talking about? Is it like a Force thing?”

“Something like that,” Kylo bit out. He walked away from the Falcon, pacing back and forth. He took deep breaths, inhaling and exhaling slowly as he searched for the connection to Rey.

“Maybe she’s just out of range…” Rose offered.

“I can feel her across galaxies!” Kylo raged.

Rose instinctively took a step back from him. Hux stepped between them.

“I-i’m sorry,” Kylo said. “I-I can always feel her..._ always… _”

“H-how is that possible?” Rose asked.

“They’re a dyad in the Force,” Hux replied. Kylo shot him a dirty look. “You’re not the only one who did his research, Ren. Know thine enemy.”

“I don’t know what that is...a dyad?” Rose said.

“Two people who share the same soul. Or something like that. It’s all very vague.”

“Like soulmates…” Rose realized. “Oh my! Does Rey know?”

“No!” Kylo replied, still pacing back and forth, his hands clenching and unclenching. “I- I wanted her to choose me because she wants to be with me, not because she thinks she has to.”

“I can understand that…” Rose replied. “So...what should we do here?”

Kylo stopped pacing. He grabbed his lightsaber, igniting it. He turned to walk away, “I find her.”

Hux grabbed Kylo’s elbow, staying his retreat. Kylo whirled around, his blade coming up to Hux’s throat. Hux threw his hands up in defense, taking a step back.

“You need to think this through, Ren. Running through the festival, slaughtering the revelers because your girlfriend is off the grid will only start a war.”

Rose came to Hux’s side, “Kylo, you know he’s right. And you know Rey wouldn’t want you to do this.”

Kylo slowly lowered the blade. “What do you suggest?” he bit out.

Hux released the breath he had been holding, lowering his arms. “That we be discreet.”

“You can’t go there looking like the Supreme Leader of the First Order,” Hux continued. He gave Kylo the once over, “Lose the tunic and the belt.”

Kylo sighed then did as Hux suggested. He stripped down to only his black sweater, pants and boots.

“It will have to do, I suppose,” Hux replied. He grabbed Kylo’s saber from him.

“Hey!” Kylo exclaimed.

“You’ll get this back once we locate the Scavenger.” Hux handed Kylo his blaster, who strapped it to his side.

“One last thing,” Rose added, “We’re coming with you.”

“Absolutely not,” Kylo said.

“We’re not asking, Ren,” Hux replied.

Kylo ran his hand over his face, cringing inwardly. He tried once more to reconnect to Rey but it was useless. The string of their bond had been cut. Either she had been cut off from the Force somehow or…

_ No _, he told himself. There was no or. Rey was alive...she had to be. Because the alternative meant he had lost her forever. And that simply was not an option.

******

  
  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kylo, Rose and Hux... the real trio we all needed. Appreciate any comments you may want to leave. I love hearing from everyone.
> 
> PS. I fear John Boyega has ruined Finn for me. Which is why I threw in the much needed Hux and Rose interaction.


	11. Through Passion, I Gain Strength

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo Ren, Hux and Rose mount a rescue mission on Pasaana.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please be aware there are mild scenes of torture and some blood. It is not gruesome or gratuitous. It is there to further the story along and get our boy Kylo a little angry. Hope you enjoy.

Kylo knelt and examined the impressions in the sand, searching for any hint of a possible clue that may be hidden from view. They were just outside the city limits, the sounds of the festival so loud it was giving him a headache.

“What are you doing?” Rose asked. She turned to Hux, whispering, “What is he doing?”

“She’s been here,” Kylo replied, his gaze flitting back and forth over the small area. He stood and took two long strides before kneeling again. He used his gloved hand to carefully brush the sand off of something.

“How can you tell?” Rose questioned.

Kylo stood again and turned to face Rose and Hux. He held up a yellow necklace and bracelet before tossing them at Rose. “She was carrying these.”

Rose caught them with ease, looking them over carefully, “I don’t recognize them. Rey was never much into jewelry. How can you be sure these were hers?”

“Her Force signature is all over them.”

“You’re like a bloodhound with your Force sensitivities,” Hux remarked, taking the jewelry from Rose and examining it. “It’s definitely Aki-Aki. She must have picked them up at the festival… At least  _ someone _ got to enjoy themselves…” Hux mumbled.

Rose elbowed him hard in the side. He gasped, doubling over. Rose turned her attention back to Kylo. He was pacing back and forth, reminding her of a caged panther desperate for escape. “C-can you feel her now?”

Kylo stopped dead in his tracks. “No.”

Hux regained his composure and stepped forward. He gave their surroundings a quick cursory look over before declaring, “If she had already been to the festival as you are suggesting, then she had to have been on the way back to the ship when she was taken.”

“Taken!?” exclaimed Rose. “Is that what we think?”

Kylo stared out at the festival, his thoughts a torrent of emotion. He already felt himself slipping… the darkness edging further into his soul.  _ Taken _ …

May their gods have mercy on the ones responsible...because Kylo Ren would not.

He reached out his hand, yanking his saber from Hux’s belt with the Force, igniting the blood red blade. Hux moved fast, grabbing Kylo by his shoulder before he could make a move. Kylo whirled on Hux, grabbing the man by his throat, squeezing. Hux desperately clawed at Kylo’s hand but it only provoked the larger man to squeeze harder.

Rose rushed over to the pair. She wedged herself between them, pleading, “Kylo, stop! Please!”

He didn’t know why he chose to listen to the mechanic but Kylo released Hux. He watched with disdain as the man crumbled to the ground, gasping for air.

Rose knelt beside him, but Hux pushed her away. “That’s it!” he cried. “I’m done being your whipping boy.” He dragged himself to his feet. “Find the Scavenger by yourself. Hell, burn down the whole city! Start a fucking war! I’m out!” Hux stormed off, heading straight into the festival.

Rose gave Kylo a look before looking in the direction in which Hux disappeared. She turned back to Kylo, “Stay here. Please.” She didn’t wait for Kylo to answer, hurrying off after Hux.

Kylo released a shaky breath. He was suddenly trembling with rage. He squeezed the hilt of his saber, channeling his anger through the blade. He swung violently, slicing and cutting through the trash receptacles, demolishing them into melted metal at his feet.

His breathing was shallow, his heart beating wildly in his chest.  _ Fuck, Rey, where are you? _

******

Warm hands… leather gloves caressing over her bare arms… tightening around her wrists almost to the point of being painful…

“Kylo?” 

Rey jolted awake. Her vision was a blur, and she blinked several times to try and focus. She immediately felt the binds on her wrists and ankles. She pulled against them. They were tight...cold steel tearing against her delicate flesh.

She squinted against the rough lighting of the room. She could barely make out the interrogation chair she was strapped to but knew it was very similar to the First Order model. Her head was throbbing (which probably explained the blurred vision) and there was a sharp pain deep within her chest, almost as if someone had ripped out a piece of her while she was unconscious. 

“Comfortable?” asked a cold voice from across the room.

Rey looked up, trying to focus on the tall figure. But it was of no use. He was just a gray blob shaped like a person.

“W-what have you done to me?” she croaked out, her own voice sounding alien to her.

“Who is Kylo?” the arrogant voice questioned. He snickered, “Surely you do not mean Supreme Leader Ren?”

Rey chose to ignore him, concentrating now on the bindings of her hands. She pulled against them, cringing as they bit into her skin, drawing blood. She took a deep breath, closed her eyes and called on The Force, willing the cuffs to open.

The pain in her chest split with agony, and Rey doubled over, the wind suddenly knocked out of her. She retched violently, coughing and sputtering.

The man chuckled, “Awww… how cute. She’s trying to use The Force.” 

She heard a few more indistinct voices laugh with the man.

“Wh-what have you d-done to me?” she repeated the question.

The man approached, his features coming slightly into focus as he drew near to her face. He was an older man, thin, a face well-worn from the years. And there was no mistaking the gray uniform he wore… it bore the familiar insignia of the old Empire.

He leaned in, his mouth so close to her ear. “We have liberated you,” he replied, his breath warm against her skin. Rey cringed and he only laughed harder.

He took a step back, his hands clasped behind his back as he paced before her. “Tell me about your relationship with the Supreme Leader.”

“I’m not going to tell you anything,” Rey spit at him.

He stopped in front of her, a puzzled look on his face. “Interesting.” He took a step towards her, his gaze assessing her. “How did the Jedi Killer earn such loyalty from the self-professed Last Jedi?”

He drew close, “You know what he did to your kind, do you not? Slaughtered them in their sleep…” He brought his finger to Rey’s stomach, tracing a path up Rey’s body to her chest as he said, “Slit them from belly to sternum…” She jerked against the restraints.

She turned to the old General, “Imagine what he’ll do to  _ you _ once he finds me…”

“When he finds what’s left of you, you mean…”

Rey spit in the man’s face, causing him to rear back in disgust. He raised his hand, smacking her across her cheek with the back of his palm. “Doctor!” he bellowed.

A smaller man appeared to the right of Rey, a syringe of a strange blue liquid in his hand. Rey immediately started to fight against the restraints. A Sith Stormtrooper came behind her and held her still. The doctor grabbed her right arm, jamming the syringe into her. 

Rey cried out, her veins burning, the pain in her chest piercing deeply… almost as if she was tearing apart from the inside out. 

The General wiped at his face with a small handkerchief from his pocket. “This can go one of two ways, Rey of Jakku. You can answer my questions and I’ll give you a swift and painless death or you can continue being stubborn… in which I will readily enjoy punishing you until you do talk.”

He grabbed her face in his vise-like grip, forcing her to look at him, “Your Sith boyfriend isn’t coming to save you, Jedi.”

*****

Rose pushed through the crowd, scanning over the many faces for the familiar visage of a certain red-headed General.

She sighed in frustration. She’d have to return to Kylo Ren soon. She wasn’t even sure if he listened to her and stayed put to begin with.

“Damn it, Hux. Where are you?” she whispered.

Suddenly the crowd seemed to part and just across the way, standing by one of the stands, was Armitage Hux. He was slightly bent over, talking with a young girl from a species Rose could only assume was Aki-Aki. She ran over to him.

“Hux!” she exclaimed. “I’m so glad I found you…” She stopped, noticing him digging in his pocket and handing the young girl some money. “Are you seriously  _ shopping _ right now?!”

He turned and gave Rose a wary look. “More like buying information.” He held up the necklace that Kylo had found and cocked his head towards the stand. Similar jewelry covered the racks.

Rose grabbed Hux in an embrace, hugging the General. “I knew you wouldn’t abandon us!”

“I...uh...I…” Hux stammered, clearly surprised.

Rose, too, was surprised and quickly released him, stepping away from him. Her whole body flushed with embarrassment.

“Th-this girl says she definitely sold Rey the necklace…” Hux pulled at the collar of his shirt nervously. 

“Did she say where Rey went?” Rose asked.

“N-no. She says she ran off, clearly headed away from the festival.”

Rose sighed, “A dead end, then…”

“Ask her if she saw Rey speak to anyone,” came the deep voice from behind Hux.

Hux and Rose turned to see Kylo Ren approaching them, his strides long and purposeful. Thankfully his saber was safely tucked away.

Hux swallowed, eyeing Kylo carefully. “Is that an order?”

Kylo came to his side and met Hux’s gaze, “Please.” He reached to his belt, grabbed his saber and offered it to Hux.

Rose watched as the two men stared at each other for a long moment. Then Hux cautiously took the saber, turning to speak to the girl in her native tongue. Rose reckoned this was as close as the two men would ever come to an apology.

Rose reached up and tentatively rubbed Kylo’s bicep, a gesture of comfort. He tensed but allowed it.

Hux exchanged a few more words with the girl then faced Kylo and Rose. “She said yes, Rey did have words with someone. He wasn’t human or Aki-Aki. He was slimy looking and he upset Rey.”

“That’s not much to go on…” Rose concluded.

The Aki-Aki girl started speaking again, gesturing animatedly at something.

“Slow down,” Hux tried.

“Look. There. There.” The young Aki-Aki pointed over their shoulders. All three turned.

As soon as Kylo’s eyes met that of Unkar Plutt’s, the old slave trader froze in fear. He dropped the fruit he was carrying and took off in a waddling run. Kylo immediately took off after him, with Hux and Rose right behind him.

Plutt ducked into a dark alley to hide. He peeked around the corner, watching for the ones that had been chasing him but was able to breathe a sigh of relief when it seemed he had lost them.

Suddenly he was grabbed from behind and slammed hard into the wall of the alley.

Kylo drew close, “Where. Is. She.” It wasn’t so much a question as a demand.

Plutt shrank back in fear, “I...I...ain’t seen her…”

Kylo held out his hand, his saber freeing itself from Hux’s belt. He ignited the blade, bringing it close to Plutt’s face.

“Do you have any idea who I am?” Kylo bit out.

Plutt gulped, “S-Supreme L-Leader….” Plutt shook his head, “I d-didn’t touch her, I swear…It- it wasn’t me…”

“It wasn’t you…?” Rose interjected. She drew close to Plutt, getting in the man’s face, “You saw something… Tell us right now!”

Kylo looked over at Hux, cocking an eyebrow. Hux just shrugged but there was a slight smile on his lips.

Plutt nodded, stammering, “Empire soldiers...they’re crawling all over the place...have been for weeks...here, Jakku...other places too.”

Hux crossed his arms over his chest, eyeing the man suspiciously, “I don’t believe you.”

“It’s the truth. They’re being secretive about it...swooping in, kidnapping the leaders...forcing their rule on the people. Doing it right under the nose of The First Order, they are…”

“What does this have to do with Rey?” Rose asked.

Plutt shrugged. “Just saw them grab her and her friend...They have a compound on the other side of that ridge..” He nodded his head in the direction of the barren desert. He swallowed, “Heard they were looking for Force sensitives...experimenting on them and the like… She’s one of them, you know…? Always has been…It-it’s why her parents wanted to be rid of her…”

Kylo grabbed Plutt by his shirt and slammed him back against the wall again, harder this time. He pushed his saber against Plutt’s face, singeing his skin with the red fire, making him cry out in pain. “Is that why you’re here? To find Force sensitive kids for the Empire?” His voice was deadly quiet.

Plutt’s eyes grew wide, his mouth going slag. 

“Ewww…gross,” Rose cringed.

“Do not judge me, girl! They’re paying handsomely for children… We do not all have  _ friends _ in the First Order! Some of us are just trying to make a living out here on the Outer Rim!” Plutt defended himself.

“And you gave them the Scavenger girl?” Hux asked.

“No! No!” He was quick with his answer. “Th-they already knew about her… I had nothing to do with it, I swear.”

Hux rubbed his chin, his mind churning. “And their compound is just over that ridge, you say?”

Plutt nodded enthusiastically. “Yes! I swear!”

“Have you ever been there?” came Hux’s next question.

Plutt’s eyes grew wide. “I-I ain’t been inside...b-but…”

“Then we have no more use for you,” Kylo stated matter-of-factly. “Turn away, Rose.”

Hux grabbed Rose and buried her face in his chest as he turned away from Kylo. The last thing she heard was the gurgled screams of Plutt as Hux ushered her out of the alley.

*****

“Again,” the General said.

The Doctor turned a dial on the controls before him. Rey screamed as the electric current coursed through her for a few seconds before the Doctor turned the dial back, tapering it off. Rey slouched forward, the bindings on her wrists and ankles the only thing still keeping her standing. One lone tear slipped down her cheek.

The General approached, grabbing her by the back of her hair and lifting her face to look at him, “Where is the First Order’s fleet?”

Rey closed her eyes, twisting her face away from the General’s as best she could with the hold he had on her.

The General grabbed her chin and turned her back to look at him, his fingers digging into the bruised flesh of her cheek. “You are a tough one...even without your Force abilities,” he laughed. 

He released her. “Bring in the pilot.”

This got Rey’s attention. She lifted her head in time to see the door to the room open and Poe enter. She squinted through the tears, desperate for the comfort of a familiar face.

Poe came to her side, reaching for her face, caressing her. “Poe…” she choked out.

“Damn it, Rey… just tell them what they want to know,” he urged.

Rey swallowed, rearing back from him. She tried in vain to focus, but Poe’s handsome visage swam before her. She shook her head and tried again. That’s when she noticed Poe’s hands were not in any restraints.

“You promised you wouldn’t hurt her, Pryde!” Poe chided the General.

General Pryde shrugged, his hands clasping behind him as he stepped away from Poe and Rey. “And you swore to me she knew where the fleet was. Looks like we are both liars.”

“Poe…” Rey whispered.

“Rey...I’m so sorry. This wasn’t supposed to go this way.” He sighed, “You were just so under  _ his _ spell… you gave me no choice.”

Rey laughed mirthlessly, then cringed from the effort. “Kylo Ren saved us! He took us in, gave us his protection… a purpose!”

Poe’s face contorted into an ugly grimace before he stepped away from her. “I thought you said removing her Force abilities would free her from this...this... _ obsession… _ ”

“Rest assured, she is cut off from him,” Pryde replied.

Poe turned back to Rey, “Please Rey, you need to see that Ren is just using us to serve his own agenda…”

Rey bowed her head, refusing to acknowledge Poe.

Pryde smiled, “Again.”

The Doctor turned the dial on the machine. Rey bloodied her lip as she bit down, refusing to give them the satisfaction of hearing her scream from the pain.

******

“This must be some kind of joke…” Hux replied. He, Rose and Kylo laid on their bellies in the sand, surveying the Empire compound and the blur of activity going on there from their higher vantage point.

“Seems like something your  _ research _ should have picked up, wouldn’t you agree?” Kylo asked, his tone laced with sarcasm.

Hux gave him a dirty look. “Perhaps if I wasn’t so busy scanning ancient texts for mentions of Holocrons, important details like  _ this _ wouldn’t be missed!”

“Gentlemen, please! This non-stop bickering isn’t getting us anywhere!” Rose exclaimed, her voice barely above a whisper.

Both men sighed in unison, returning their focus to the compound. They watched in silence, monitoring the comings and goings of the Empire personnel and Sith Stormtroopers.

“We need to get in there…” Kylo murmured, his hands clenching and unclenching. He was getting more anxious by the minute.

“I’m assuming you’re suggesting taking your lightsaber and just massacring your way through…” came Hux’s sardonic response.

“You have a better idea?” Kylo bit out through clenched teeth.

“Better than one man and his  _ sword _ ? I’m sure I can come up with something…” Hux replied with his usual air of superiority.

“You didn’t see him with that  _ sword _ when he rescued the Resistance from the Empire a few months back. Probably killed more than 200 red Stormtroopers by himself…” Rose commented.

It was her turn for one of Hux’s dirty looks now. She shrugged, “I’m just saying.”

Kylo cocked an eyebrow at Rose, a smirk tugging at his lips.

Hux fumed. “What I am saying is that if we march in there with guns a-blazing, what’s to stop them from killing the Scavenger as soon as they hear us coming?! If she isn’t dead already.”

Rose elbowed Hux directly in the ribs as hard as she could. “Ow! You really must stop doing that!” he exclaimed.

Rose nodded towards Kylo and Hux turned to see the man’s rage simmering just beneath the surface at Hux’s words. “Right. I mean, I’m sure she’s alive. We just need a better plan, that’s all.”

Kylo just grunted his response.

Rose’s face lit up. “The Wookie Prisoner trick!” she exclaimed, perhaps a little too loud. Both Kylo and Hux shushed her. “Sorry…” she whispered. “The Wookie Prisoner trick…” she repeated. They both just stared blankly at her.

“Kylo, surely you know it…The Wookie Prisoner Trick,” she reiterated.

“Repeating it isn’t going to make me remember something I’ve never heard of,” he replied.

Rose’s mouth dropped open in surprise. “Come on! Your dad and Uncle used it to rescue your mother...You know what? Never mind.” She paused before continuing, “Basically it goes like this...one of us disguises themselves as a red Stormtrooper and pretends to have captured the others as prisoners. It’s the easiest and least violent way to get into that compound, plus we should be able to get close to wherever they are keeping the other prisoners.”

“Rey…” Kylo replied.

“And Poe…” added Rose.

“And the Aki-Aki leaders…” Hux said.

Both Rose and Kylo turned to give him a puzzled look.

“Here me out: If we can believe what that idiot Plutt said, the Empire is holding the Aki-Aki leaders as prisoners. If we free them, then they will see it as the First Order came to their rescue. It won’t matter then if word gets out we were on this planet. It will look like we did it to save the Aki-Aki from Empire rule,” Hux explained.

“We will look like the good guys,” Rose replied.

“It will cause other planets to rethink their opinion of The First Order…perhaps even sway them to follow us in this war with the Empire,” Hux agreed.

They both turned to look at Kylo. His jaw was clenched tight as he considered their words. “Alright… let’s say I agree to this plan. How exactly are we supposed to get the prisoners out of the compound? And for the First Order to look like the heroes, we are going to have to deliver a serious blow to this Empire fleet.”

“Well, if we are going to commit to this, might I suggest we call in FN-2187’s Stormtroopers?” Hux suggested.

Kylo cringed inwardly. It didn’t go unnoticed by Hux and Rose.

“You made a face. Why are you making a face?” Hux questioned.

Kylo swallowed, “They’re already on the planet… not far from here…”

“What?! Did you not listen to a single word I said on The Finalizer?!”

“Spare me your lecture. I had Finn bring a small faction of his better trained soldiers in an unmarked transport. Obviously it was a smart decision on my part, seeing as how we actually do need them…” Kylo tried to explain his decision.

“Ren, you’re lucky you didn’t get us all killed!” Hux replied.

“Okay…okay… we can discuss the Supreme Leader’s bad decision making skills later… once we all survive this,” Rose interjected. “So, what’s the plan?”

Hux pondered a moment. “Alright…Ren and I will infiltrate the compound using Rose’s prisoner thing...”

“Wookie Prisoner Trick,” Rose corrected him.

“That is a dumb name but yes, using  _ that _ …Once inside we will locate the prisoners and free them. That is more than likely going to trigger an alarm. That’s when FN-2187…err…I mean Finn… and his Stormtroopers will storm the compound and distract the guards, aiding in our escape.”

“That is a terrible plan,” Rose stated.

“Hey!” Hux exclaimed.

Rose rolled her eyes. “Come on, Hux, you’re going to get people killed.”

“Agreed,” Kylo huffed.

“You have a better idea?” questioned Hux.

“Umm…maybe… but first I need to see one of the red Stormtrooper’s blasters.”

*****

Rey felt so warm. The sunlight pouring in from the window combined with the snuggly comforter on the bed made her want to stay asleep just a little bit longer. She buried herself deeper beneath the comforter, refusing nature’s call to wake. She was comfortable here...she was safe.

“Hey there, sleepy head, you planning on getting up sometime today?” asked a familiar deep male voice from the other side of the room.

Rey’s eyes flew open and she immediately sat up in bed. The comforter flopped to her waist, revealing she was completely naked.

She quickly gathered it to her to cover herself as she turned to look at the man who had spoken.

Kylo was leaning against a large desk, clothed only in his black sleep pants, his arms crossed over his wide chest. There was a sneaky smile tugging at the corners of his mouth, as if he knew something she didn’t.

He cocked an eyebrow, “Little late for modesty, isn’t it, Sunshine?”

Sunshine...his Rey of Sunshine... yes, that’s what he always called her.

Rey smiled, “Force of habit, Ren...”

“Oh, Ren is it? Last night it was ‘ _ Oh god, Kylo, yes...more _ ’...”

“You ass!” She grabbed her pillow and threw it at him. He easily knocked it away, laughing.

Two strides brought him to the bed. He took her face in both his hands as he brought one knee to settle on the bed. He leaned over her, taking her lips in a commanding kiss.

She moaned against his mouth, savoring the feel of his hot breath, his full lips, the way his teeth pulled at her... She was suddenly so scared to let go lest this be the last time they were ever intimate. But  _ why _ she should feel this way remained elusive to her sleep-addled brain.

Then pain tore at her breast and she pulled away, her breathing shallow.

“What’s the matter, Sunshine?” He was concerned. He nudged her over and sat down on the edge of the mattress, facing her.

Rey looked at him, grabbed his face in her hands and just  _ felt _ him. He seemed so real.

“Rey, talk to me.” He brushed a lock of hair from her face.

She swallowed, “I...I had the worst dream...A nightmare, really.”

“Tell me and then it won’t come true.”

“Is that really how it works?” she asked with all sincerity.

He chuckled, revealing the sweetest dimple on the side of his mouth. “I don’t know! It’s just something my mother always used to say when I had a bad dream...”

“Leia...” Rey remembered.

“Yes, Leia. Rey, are you feeling okay?” Kylo questioned.

She shook her head, her hand absently touching her chest as the pain only increased. “I rather think not...” A tear slipped down her cheek.

He quickly caught it with the tip of his finger. “None of that...” he whispered. He pulled her into his arms, rubbing her back to comfort her.

Rey sank into his embrace, breathing deeply of his scent. Suddenly the lights in the room flickered. She pulled back to look at Kylo.

“I...I dreamed someone cut me open...sliced me straight through and took half of my soul...” She began to cry.

“Rey....ssh....it was just a bad dream...I’m here with you now...” He tried to pull her back to him but she wouldn’t allow it.

“That’s just it, Kylo, I don’t think you are...”

The room flickered, the desk and pillow disappearing…fading into an oblivion she feared she would soon join.

Kylo grabbed her face and turned her back to look at him. “I am  _ always _ with you, Rey.”

He pointed at her chest, “I’m right here...”

Rey doubled over, a burning igniting within her body. “Kylo....” she whimpered.

“Rey, look at me,” he ordered. She looked up at him.

“You are the strongest person I know...the last of the Jedi...” He grabbed her hand, placing her palm on his chest. He placed his own on hers, exactly where she felt like she was being ripped in two.

“We are one...” he continued, “...our Bond is like life itself. If they took half your soul, then I shall give you half of mine.” He caressed her cheek, “I will gladly split myself in two to make you whole again.”

“Kylo....” she pleaded as she felt herself slipping… oblivion pulling her away from him.

“I-I am sorry… for all the things I said…” she cried, desperately reaching out to grab hold of a piece of him. But it was no use. He only seemed further and further away the more she tried.

Kylo stood, reaching his hand out to her, “Call out for me, Sunshine. And I will come...”

*****

A loud thump woke Rey from unconsciousness. She blinked rapidly, the dream she had been having fading quickly into the recesses of her mind. She tried to hold onto it… feeling the sudden importance of it but it was already gone.

Fingers snapped in her face and she reared back. She was greeted with the sudden pain spiraling throughout her body. She hurt everywhere… her muscles tired and sore; the cuts from her restraints on her wrists and ankles aching for relief. Her head was still spinning, blurring her vision and making her squint just so she could see what was happening in the room around her.

Poe was pacing back and forth while the irritating General Pryde stood by the large table with his arms crossed. An object she barely recognized lay on the table before him.

“She’s awake, sir,” the Sith Stormtrooper standing before her said. He moved away.

“Nice of you to rejoin us, Rey,” Pryde replied.

Rey ignored him, pulling on her restraints, praying for a weakness in the metal.

“Do you know what this is?” Pryde asked, gesturing at the small box shaped object on the table. “It’s a Jedi Holocron,” he continued, “Virtually useless these days to everyone save  _ you _ …”

Rey stared at the object, blinking to clear the fog in her vision. The box was glowing blue, inlaid with golden symbols all around it. It reminded her of a blue sky surrounded by the warm rays of the sun…

_ Sunshine… _

“ _ Call out for me, Sunshine, and I will come _ …”

Those words… spoken to her in her dream. But by who…? Who was she supposed to call for? Rey cried out in frustration.

Poe came to her side. “Rey… Rey, please…this will all be over if you just answer their questions…”

“Get away from me,” she replied through clenched teeth.

Poe was exasperated, “Why are you protecting him?! He’s a fucking monster!”

“Him…?” Rey questioned, shaking her head to clear the confusion.

Poe looked over at Pryde, “What is wrong with her?”

Pryde shrugged, “Perhaps you hit her too hard… gave her a concussion…”

“Actually it is a side effect from the suppression drug,” the doctor chimed in. “By suppressing her natural Force abilities, we are causing her body to turn against itself, in a manner of speaking. The sheer pain she must be going through… it’s truly remarkable how much she can withstand.”

“Could-could it have something to do with the fact that she is bonded to another Force user?” Poe questioned.

Pryde’s head snapped to Poe, a look of worry on his face. “Bonded?! To whom?”

Poe swallowed, “To the Supreme Leader Kylo Ren…”

_ Kylo Ren _ …  _ Yes _ , thought Rey,  _ that is his name… Kylo… _

“Fascinating,” the doctor crooned. He drew close to Rey, examining her. “If I could get my hands on this Ren, imagine the possibilities of our research…”

“It is out of the question,” Pryde ordered. “We have strict instructions not to touch the Supreme Leader.”

“Wait, what?!” Poe exclaimed. “Why?”

“That’s none of your concern.”

“Like hell it isn’t. Do you have any idea what he’ll do to me if he finds out I played a role in this…”

Pryde smirked, “Then I suggest you don’t let him find out…”

Poe ran his hands nervously through his hair, “Fuck!”

Pryde approached Rey, grabbing her hair roughly to lift her gaze to meet his, “Why does the First Order want the Jedi Holocron, Rey? Tell me.”

She shook her head, letting the pain she felt help her to remember that she is still alive “Never.”

Pryde released her and whirled around to face the doctor. “Give her another dose.”

The doctor looked panicked, “Another dose? Sir, anymore and it might kill her… like the others…”

Pryde shot him a dirty look, “And?”

The doctor shrank back from the General. He hurried over to his table to prepare another syringe.

Poe stepped in front of Pryde, “This wasn’t part of the deal, Pryde!”

“Well then, the deal’s off,” Pryde coolly responded.

Poe hauled off and punched Pryde in the face, causing the older General to stumble back. “Guards!” Pryde roared.

The two Sith Troopers pounced on Poe, slamming him to the ground. They took the butt of their blasters, ramming it into his face, stomach and side.

“No!” Rey cried out.

Pryde held out his hand and the Stormtroopers stopped the beating. He approached Rey, “So that’s your weakness, is it, young Jedi? Even after everything he has done to you…”

“Stop…please…” Rey pleaded.

“What does the First Order want with a Jedi Holocron?” Pryde repeated.

_ Kylo Ren…just call out his name _ …

Rey looked at the bloodied, beaten body of Poe and started to weep. “T-to m-merge it with a Sith Holocron…”

“Impossible!” Pryde said.

She shook her head, “N-not impossible… just uncommon…Sith…Jedi…working together…”

“You and Ren…why?”

“To show us the way…” Rey whimpered.

“The way to what?! Damn, woman, just say it!”

“To the Dagger of Mortis… to kill Palpatine…”

Pryde took a step back in shock. But it only lasted a moment. He closed the distance and grabbed Rey roughly by her chin, “You will tell me  _ everything _ …”

_ Kylo Ren…Kylo… Ren… Ren...B-Ben… Ben… BEN _ …! Rey screamed in her mind.

*****

“Cover me,” the Sith Stormtrooper said to his fellow soldier, “Gotta go take a leak.”

“Make it quick. Shift change is coming,” the other responded.

He nodded, stepping away from his post. He walked over to a dark corner of the rock formations and whipped it out. He released a contented sigh as he began to empty his bladder. But it was quickly interrupted by a scurrying noise behind him. “Fuck,” he cursed, zipping up before whirling around with his blaster raised. But he was only greeted with empty darkness. He waited a moment, scanning his surroundings. The night was quiet now. He lowered his weapon and returned his attention to the task at hand. Suddenly he felt himself lurch forward, his face connecting hard with the rocks. He crumpled to the ground in an unconscious heap.

Kylo crept out of the darkness to stand over the Stormtrooper. He raised his hand and with a quick flick of his wrist, he heard the man’s neck snap. He cocked his head, staring down at the soldier and feeling no sympathy.  _ Hold it together _ , he told himself. 

Rose and Hux came out of their hiding spot and joined his side.

“Is-is he dead?” Rose stammered.

“Yes,” Kylo replied, his voice devoid of all emotion.

Rose knelt and grabbed the blaster, quickly rising and putting enough space between her and the dead man. Sensing her discomfort, Hux grabbed the man’s feet, pulling him further into the shadows of the rocks. 

Rose turned the blaster over in her hands, examining the weapon.

Kylo crossed his arms and looked at Rose, his impatience growing, “Well?”

Rose swallowed, “Alright, as I suspected, the Empire still loves to use cloning technology and their weapons are no exception.”

“Explain,” Kylo ordered.

“See here?” she said, showing Hux and Kylo the blaster. “There isn’t a battery, meaning these blasters are drawing their energy from one source… probably a power grid of some kind within the compound.” She paused, thoroughly examining the blaster. “Basically all their blasters are clones of each other. Kill the main system, kill all the weapons.”

“Are you saying if we can get you to this power source, then you can shut down their weapons?” Kylo asked.

“In theory…”

“Yes or no, Rose.”

“Y-yes… If I can find the power source, I can encode it with a virus. The whole system will shut down to protect itself while it reboots. We’ll have like a 6 minute window where the entire compound’s security will be out of commission. It should give Finn and his Stormtroopers plenty of time to take the place, paving a way for us to escape with the prisoners.” She flipped the blaster in her hands, “It’s amazing they are still using this old tech…”

“How do you know all this?” Hux questioned, more in awe than in doubt.

She shrugged, “I spent a lot of time in my early days of the Resistance reading manuals and…well…basically anything I could get my hands on. I learned a lot about enemy tech.”

Hux smiled at Rose but she didn’t notice. However, Kylo did and snorted his displeasure. Hux’s smile faded and he cleared his throat, “Well… 6 minutes isn’t a lot of time…”

“It’s enough,” Kylo said, moving away from them. He walked closer to the rocky edge, looking out at the compound. He absently rubbed his chest. He strangely felt so hollow that it was almost painful.

“If you shut down all their weaponry, then this blaster will also become useless,” Hux mentioned.

“Not necessarily,” Rose replied. “I think I can encode this with your fingerprint specifically… very similar to the First Order tech used on our room palm pads and in the TIE. I’ve been studying it…”

Hux nodded then froze, “Wait,  _ my _ fingerprint?!”

Rose smiled, “You’re the only one the Stormtrooper suit will fit. I’m too short…”

“And I’m too tall,” Kylo replied, “Which makes  _ you _ just right…” He came up behind Hux and slapped his hand down hard on the General’s shoulder, “I thought you’d be happy, Armitage, seeing as how Rose here has a thing for Stormtroopers.”

“Kylo!” Rose chided him, her entire face turning beet red. She and Hux met each other’s gazes then quickly turned away.

“I will go radio Finn. If you two could stop eye fucking each other long enough to get Hux into that suit, I’d really appreciate it.” Kylo didn’t wait for a response. He simply walked away.

Hux looked over at Rose sheepishly, “Ren is… quite crude sometimes.”

“He’s…uh…he’s just worried about Rey, I think…” Rose replied, staring down at her hands. “We should probably get you into that suit…”

“I think I can manage on my own,” Hux said, “You just get that blaster ready.”

“R-right…” Rose stammered. She turned her back on Hux, focusing in vain on the blaster’s specs. She had to suppress a giggle when she heard Hux spew a dozen curse words as he obviously struggled with the Stormtrooper outfit. “Are you ok over there, Hux?” she called out.

There was no response for the space of several heartbeats. Then, in a small voice, Hux said, “I think I may need your help…”

Rose couldn’t help but smile a little as she walked over to the shadowy area. She took one look at the red-headed General and said, “Well, what did you expect? You have it on backwards.”

“I don’t bloody know how to put this thing on!” he exclaimed, clearly put out.

“Didn’t you used to run the Stormtrooper program?” she questioned.

“Yes… but I didn’t supervise their uniforms!”

She closed the distance, unhooking the top armor and flipping it around. “Hold still…” She wrapped the piece around his torso, then moved behind him to buckle the straps.

Hux cleared his throat, “A-about what Ren said…”

Her hands paused for a moment, “Armitage…I…uh…”

“Don’t,” he interrupted her. He pulled away and turned to face her. He swallowed, looking down at her, “Don’t say it.” She sighed and looked up at him then, meeting his gaze. He brushed a lock of hair out of her face, “I hope that idiot FN-2187 knows what he has…” They both just stared at one another, looks of sadness and regret on their faces.

It was Hux who broke eye contact first, rolling his eyes and sighing, “Bloody hell. Just promise me something, ok?” He looked away from her now as he continued, “If it doesn’t work out with FN-2187, try to  _ consider _ me. I know I haven’t always been a good man but…  _ for you _ , I would try.” He met her gaze, “I’d move planets to make you happy, Rose.”

She didn’t say anything. And in that moment he would have given anything for Ren’s ability to read minds. Rose finished tightening the straps on the uniform and grabbed the helmet. But she didn’t move to put it on. She stared at it in her hands for the space of several heartbeats.

“Rose?” he questioned.

Rose suddenly stood on her tiptoes and kissed Hux’s cheek. Then she quickly shoved the Stormtrooper helmet over his head before he could say anything. “Don’t die,” she said, before turning and walking off.

“Well that went as well as to be expected,” Kylo replied from behind Hux.

Hux whirled around, trying desperately to pinpoint Kylo’s location. “What did you think would happen…with the way  _ you _ embarrassed her?!”

Kylo pushed himself away from the rock he was leaning against, “She feels something for you. She  _ likes _ you…”

Hux perked up, “Really? How much?”

“Not enough, General. You and I… we aren’t meant for Resistance life. It’s best just to let it go.” Again, Kylo rubbed at his chest. He took a deep breath, a sharp pain settling in his lungs.

“And are you going to  _ let go _ of the Scavenger?” Hux asked.

“Yes,” Kylo whispered.

Both men just stood there, a moment of silence passing between them.

“I’ll believe it when I see it,” Hux concluded. “Which won’t be anytime soon! How in the hell do these Stormtroopers see out of these things?!” He pulled the helmet off, shaking out his hair. “Or breathe, for that matter!”

“Alright, gents, I think I’ve figured out the blaster…” Rose said rather jovially, coming from around the rocks.

_“Kylo_ _Ren_…”

Kylo froze.

_ “Kylo…Ren _ …”

He whipped around, staring at the compound.

_ “Ren _ …”

A pain sliced through his chest, the air being expunged from his lungs as if he had been suddenly hit. He doubled over.

“Kylo!” Rose exclaimed.

“ _ R…Ren _ …”

“ _ B..Ben… Ben _ …”

Kylo growled, pulling his saber to him and igniting it.

“ _ BEN _ !”

“Rey…” Kylo whispered.

******

“Fascinating…” General Pryde spoke in awe. He held the Jedi Holocron close to Rey, watching as blue light crept from the cube, almost as if it was reaching for her.

Rey was slouched over in the interrogation chair. Blood dripped from her now split lip, staining her once white clothes. She tried to focus on the pattern of it, anything to remain conscious and aware. She just needed to survive this. He was coming for her… It was only a matter of time.

“Open it,” Pryde ordered.

Rey wasn’t sure who he was speaking to until he grabbed her by the back of her hair, yanking her head up to look at him. 

“Open the holocron.”

“N-no…” she stammered.

He drew close to her, “Open it… or I’m going to let my men pass you around until there is  _ nothing _ left of you, Jedi…”

Rey cringed. She closed her eyes, letting the images of another man fill her mind… a tall, powerful man with the tenderest of touches. A man who had never laid a finger on her in malice, even when he had her strapped to a similar chair.

“Open it!” Pryde bellowed.

“I- I don’t know how!” she cried.

Pryde laughed cruelly. “And you are the last of the Jedi...pathetic.” He walked away from her to stand by the long table. He lifted the holocron to study it closer. Then he slammed it down on the hard steel surface of the tabletop, crushing the cube.

“No!” Rey cried out. 

Suddenly a piece of the broken object flew towards Pryde, scraping his cheek before falling to the floor.

Rey stared in wonder at her hand, feeling the power flowing through her.

Pryde was startled for a moment. He tentatively touched his cheek, his fingers coming away rimmed in blood.

“Why you little cunt…” Pryde said, his voice low, filled with hatred. He raised his hand.

Rey turned away, bracing for the impact.

The radio crackled at Pryde’s belt. “Come in, General Pryde.”

Pryde grabbed his radio, “I’m in the middle of an interrogation and gave strict orders not to be bothered!”

“Y-yes, sir. But SST-417 has apprehended two people while on patrol. I really think you need to see this.”

“Must I do everything myself,” Pryde bemoaned. He turned to the comm, “Fine. This better be good.” Pryde turned to the doctor, “Give her another dose of the suppression. I want her docile for what I have planned next.” He turned to the two Sith Stormtroopers, “You two with me.”

Pryde opened the door and stepped out of the room, followed by the two guards.

The doctor sighed and started to prepare a new syringe of the blue drug.

Rey swallowed, “Water...please…”

The doctor looked up at her then resumed his task, ignoring her.

“Please...you’re a doctor...you save people…” she tried pleading.

The doctor sighed, “You pretend like I have a choice in the matter. I am as much a prisoner as you.” He paused before adding, “This was my life’s work, you know? Studying the Force sensitives. I never wanted this.”

“Then help me. I can take you back to the First Order…”

“The First Order!?” The doctor approached her. “The First Order killed my entire family when they destroyed Hosnian Prime. They are the true enemy.” He grabbed Rey by the chin, making her cry out in pain, “And you are nothing but the Supreme Leader’s whore!” He shoved her face to the side with such force she thought he might break her jaw. Then he turned to walk away from her.

Poe staggered to his feet at that precise moment, hitting the small doctor over the head with a piece of metal piping he had pulled from the interrogation chair. The doctor stumbled then fell into the steel table, smashing his face. He rolled to the floor.

“Poe!” Rey exclaimed.

Poe was still woozy, rocking back and forth on his feet. He slowly turned to face Rey, falling towards her. He grabbed onto the chair, holding himself upright. “Rey… Rey, I really messed up…”

“I-I need you to unlatch the restraints, Poe,” she pleaded.

“Ren is going to kill me…”

“N-no...We will go back together...He never has to know...I swear it, Poe...Please…”

Poe reached over to her left hand, pulling the pin from the latch. It released immediately. He then repeated it with her right hand. 

Rey cried out as she peeled her flesh from the steel, relief flooding her when she was finally free.

Poe came to stand before her, “I’m so sorry…”

Rey clenched her right hand into a fist, pulled back and connected with Poe’s jaw. He stumbled back before collapsing onto the floor.

Rey screamed at the top of her lungs, channeling all the pain and anguish from the past few hours as tears rolled down her face. She shook with rage and the whole room seemed to tremble with her. The restraints on her ankles opened and she fell from the chair, sinking to her knees onto the floor.

She was out of breath now, heaving sobs as she cried and cried. Then she felt it… a warmth filling the hole in her chest, beating down her pain.

She looked up at the door. “Kylo…” she murmured, her voice nothing more than a hoarse whisper.

Everything went black.

*****

Hux shoved Rose to her knees, then kicked Kylo in the back of his legs, causing the big man to fall into the dirt at the feet of two Sith Stormtroopers. “Found these two while I went to take a leak,” he replied. “Seemed suspicious.”

One of the Stormtroopers approached Kylo, carefully studying him. “What’s your name?”

Hux took the butt of his blaster and busted Kylo in the face, splitting his lip, “Answer him, scum!”

Kylo glared at Hux for a moment, his tongue darting out from his mouth to taste the blood. 

_ You’re enjoying this _ , Kylo spoke in Hux’s mind.  _ Dial it down a notch _ .

The other Stormtrooper drew closer to Kylo, “What’s your story, mate?”

Rose moved in, coming between Kylo and the Stormtrooper, “Hey there…” 

The Stormtrooper turned to look at her. 

“Yeah… hi… we’re just a couple of merchants passing through this system. Thought we might try our luck at the Festival here…”

“Merchants, eh?” He again looked at Kylo, “What’s the matter with him?”

“He’s mute,” Rose quickly replied. Kylo turned and looked at her, cocking an eyebrow. “Yeah… he’s my muscle. A woman can’t be too careful here on the Outer Rim…”

The two Stormtroopers looked at each other for a moment before one of them said, “We should call General Pryde.”

Hux stepped forward, “Are we really going to bother the General for two spice runners?”

“Spice runner?!” Rose exclaimed.

“Quiet you!” Hux yelled. He raised his blaster as if he was going to strike her. Rose cowered.

Hux turned back to the Stormtroopers, “We should throw them in the Brig. No need to involve the General.”

One of them shrugged, “Fine by me.” He moved over to the door and pressed in a code. The door slid open.

Hux walked behind Kylo, kicking him in the back hard, “On your feet, scum.” 

Kylo grunted from the painful kick then he quickly stood. He towered over the three other men.

“You’re a big fella,” one of the stormtroopers remarked. “You might want to think about putting him in binders…”

Hux snickered, “Barely even put up a fight… all show, this one.”

“Still…” the stormtrooper replied. He reached to his right, grabbing a set of cuffs. “Here,” he said to Hux. “He’s your catch, so you do it.” It was obvious the man was wary of Kylo.

Hux took the cuffs and turned to face Kylo. “Now be a good little mute and put the binders on…” Hux kept his voice steady, careful not to betray his growing concern.

But Kylo surprisingly complied, holding his wrists out to Hux and allowing his General to easily bind him.

Hux turned back to the stormtrooper, “Satisfied?”

The man nodded, stepping out of their way.

Hux nudged Rose and Kylo through the door, then pushed them to the left.

“Hey, SST-417...the Brig is the other direction…”

Hux cringed, “Uh...right...got turned around. Usually I come in through the South entrance.” He nudged Rose and Kylo to the right, missing the exchange of looks between the Sith Stormtroopers.

“This  _ is _ the South entrance…” one stormtrooper said to the other.

All three froze. Hux turned to face the stormtroopers.

“I think we’d better call General Pryde...Just to be on the safe side.” He nodded to his comrade, who immediately reached for his comm.

Kylo closed his eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath. When he opened them, he met Hux’s gaze. Hux raised his blaster, firing two shots and hitting the two Stormtroopers in their chests. Both men fell.

Kylo raised his shackled hands and Hux took off the binders. Kylo yanked down a nearby console on the wall to his left, keying information into the system. “Get Rose to the computer room,” he ordered Hux, showing the pair the location on the screen. “Looks like only four heat signatures located there so you shouldn’t face too much opposition. As soon as she takes down the system, radio Finn.”

“Wait! Where are you going?” Hux asked.

“To free the prisoners,” Kylo replied, igniting his saber.

“That’s not the plan!” Hux exclaimed. 

Kylo nodded towards the Stormtroopers running towards them from outside, “Tell that to them!” He hit the switch, slamming the door shut, before taking his saber and slicing the keypad to a charred ruin.

“And find another way out,” Kylo said, before taking off down the right hall, disappearing from sight.

Rose grabbed Hux, “Come on! Let’s go.”

Rose tried to take off in a run but Hux pulled her to a stop. “You’re still my prisoner. Act like it…” he chided her.

“Oh! Right.” She held out her hands and Hux placed the binders on her wrists. He took her by her elbow and gently shoved her in front of him, the tip of his blaster pressed against her back.

As if on cue, a team of Stormtroopers came running down the hall, passing Hux and Rose. Hux tried to hurry Rose along without bringing attention to themselves.

“You there,” called out one of them. 

Hux froze, turning to face the commanding officer.

“Get that prisoner to the Brig and report to the front of the compound. There’s been intruders,” he ordered Hux.

Hux gave a short nod and the Stormtrooper moved away.

Rose released a shaky breath, “That was close.”

“Too close,” Hux agreed. He nudged her with the blaster, “Come on, let’s get this done and get the hell out of here.”

“I’ll never be so relieved to see The Finalizer with its cold, steel walls and suffocating atmosphere than I will be today,” Rose replied.

“Surely it’s not all that bad…”

Rose looked at Hux, “No, not that bad…” She smiled up at him, secretly wishing she could see the expression on his face.

*****

Kylo used his saber to deflect the blaster fire from the cadre of Stormtroopers running towards him. He reached with the Force to slam the soldiers against walls and even the ceiling of the compound. The whole place shook with the force of his rage as he allowed his inner darkside to finally have complete control. He tore through the men, slicing some with his saber while others he left twisted and mangled with just the power of his mind. He reached the end of the hall in under a minute, briefly looking over his shoulder at the carnage he left in his wake. 

He took a deep breath, reaching out for Rey’s signature. He was relieved when he felt her close by. He took the passage to the right.

He tripped over a pair of legs. He reached down and yanked the man from his hiding spot. He was an older man, wearing the uniform of an Empire officer. Kylo slammed him up against the wall.

“Where is the girl?” he demanded.

“Please don’t hurt me,” Pryde whimpered.

Kylo released him, letting only a brief moment pass before grabbing the Force and choking the General. Pryde struggled to breathe, his thin face turning a deep shade of red. He clawed at his own neck, as if he could somehow pull the invisible fingers from his throat.

“Tell me where the girl is and perhaps I’ll let you live,” he replied, clenching his fingers to tighten his hold.

Pryde pointed down the hall. Kylo released his hold on him and the old man fell to the ground in a heap. Kylo physically grabbed him and thrust him towards the direction he had pointed.

“Show me.”

Pryde staggered down the corridor, glancing over his shoulder once or twice at the menacing form of Kylo Ren. Kylo remained alert, listening and watching for more Stormtroopers as they passed more corridors and halls leading further into the compound. 

Pryde stopped at a door, “S-she’s in there…”

Kylo shoved him towards the palm pad, “Open it!”

Quickly he punched in a sequence of numbers and the door slid open. Rey was slumped on the floor, her back against the interrogation chair. Kylo shoved Pryde out of his way, the old man’s face colliding with one of the walls, as he rushed inside the room.

Kylo sank to his knees beside Rey, carefully taking her small form into his arms.

Her eyes immediately fluttered open and she looked up at him with confusion. “Kylo?”

“I’m here, Rey,” his voice trembled, even as relief flooded through him.

Her hand drifted to his cheek, giving him a slight caress, “What took you so long?”

He chuckled in spite of himself. “Sorry, love, I got detained. Won’t happen again.”

She gave him a weak but warm smile, “That’s okay…I waited for you…”

He pulled her tight against him, burying his face in her hair, relishing in the feeling of her breathing against him. She pressed herself into his embrace, and he could sense through their bond her growing fear that this was all another terrible dream.

“I’m  _ here _ , Rey,” he tried to reassure her.

“Don’t let me go,” she pleaded, her voice shaking, betraying the tears she was crying.

“Never… You’re stuck with me, Jedi.”

She squeezed him harder and he responded in kind, but careful not to further injure her. A sound in the hall startled them and Kylo had no choice but to pull away. He rose swiftly, engaging his lightsaber. He caught a glimpse of the sniveling General as he retreated down another hallway, disappearing from sight. He had more pressing matters to worry over than one lone Empire officer so he decided to let the man go, returning his attention back to Rey.

She was pulling herself to her feet, cringing from the effort. He came to her side, disengaging his saber to better help her stand. She turned to look up at him. She brought her fingers to drift over his bottom lip, “You’re hurt…”

“Hux. Long story.”

She brought her hand to her own face now, touching the bruise on her cheek, the split in her lip, her sweat soaked hair clinging to her neck. “I must look a fright…”

He took her face in the palms of his hands, bringing his lips close to her own, “You’re perfect, Rey.” And he meant it, pouring all his emotion into the faint connection of their bond.

“Let’s go home…” Rey replied, a tear slipping down her cheek.

His heart squeezed in his chest.  _ Home _ …  _ She  _ was his home _ . _ ..

He covered her mouth with his, softly kissing her. He felt her wince in pain but she still pressed her lips against his, wanting to deepen their exchange. He had to pull back. “We need to get out of here,” he said, as if that was the reason he ended the kiss. “Can you walk?”

She nodded, “I-I think so…” She pulled away from him, steadying herself for a moment on the interrogation chair before taking a few successful steps towards the door.

Kylo came to her side, stepping in front of her to check the hall. It was clear, which he found altogether strange. He turned to Rey, “Do you know where they’re keeping the other prisoners?”

“N-no…I was brought straight to interrogation. K-Kylo, they d-did something t-to m-me…” she stammered.

He mustered a smile, “We’ll fix it, Rey. I promise.” He turned back to the hall. He closed his eyes, reaching out with the Force to ascertain the location of the prisoners.

“We have to go to the right,” he said.

“Isn’t the way out to the left?” she questioned.

“I…um… I have to rescue the Aki-Aki leaders first…” he replied sheepishly.

“Oh! Well… that is…  _ unexpected _ …” She was surprised.

He briefly exchanged a look with her, “Don’t get used to it…was Hux’s idea to cover up First Order presence on the planet.”

“And here I thought you were becoming one of the good guys…” she replied sarcastically.

He gave her a smirk, “What? And ruin this? We both know you have a thing for the bad boys.”

She rolled her eyes and he chuckled low. He gently pulled her towards him, “Stay close to me.”

She instinctively reached for her saber at her hip and found only air. “My lightsaber!” she exclaimed.

Anger briefly crossed Kylo’s features before he covered it with indifference. “Doesn’t matter. We’ll get you another.”

“I-I’m sorry…”

“It’s only a saber, Rey.”

“Your  _ Grandfather’s _ saber… I know what it means to you…” her voice trailed off. 

“You’re  _ all _ that is important to me,” he reassured her. He turned away from her then, checking the hall once more before stepping out, Rey at his heels.

*****

Hux burst into the computer room, firing four shots, hitting the Empire techs in their chests and backs. They fell from their chairs. He turned towards the door, poking his head out into the hall and nodding at Rose. She hurried inside and Hux slammed the panel door shut.

Hux immediately took off his helmet, breathing a huge sigh of relief. “These are positively suffocating!”

“Not to mention a breeding ground for bacteria,” Rose remarked, cautiously stepping over one of the young men before climbing into his chair. 

Hux cringed at her words, giving the helmet in his hand a disgusted look. He set it down and immediately came to her side, taking the legs of the man beside her and dragging him away. The young man stirred and Hux dropped his legs. He looked at the blaster Rose had given him. “Rose, my dear, is this set for stun?” he questioned.

She briefly glanced at him before returning her attention to the computer screen. “I’m one of the good guys, Armitage, remember?”

He sighed, returning the blaster to his side. He looked at the unconscious man at his feet, nudging him with the toe of his boot.

“Relax, Hux, he should be out for a few hours, at least.” She was rapidly keying information into the Empire computer, intently focused on her task. He came to stand behind her, watching the screen.

“Well?” he questioned, after a few minutes. 

“Ssh…let me think!” she exclaimed.

“Perhaps if you bypassed the main system and…”

“Armitage!” she chided. “I’ve got this!”

Hux threw his hands up in defeat, backing away. He went to stand by the door, listening for footsteps. He started to pace, his hands clasping behind him.

“You’re making me nervous, Hux,” Rose replied.

He stopped, running his hand through his hair. He leaned against a far wall, watching camera monitors now. They flipped every few seconds to show the halls and corridors. Stormtroopers were amassing in every location, making Hux feel very uneasy. He glanced at Rose over his shoulder.

“You know… I wasn’t really going to hit you with my blaster earlier… in front of those other stormtroopers..”

Her fingers paused but she didn’t look at him. She swallowed, “You hit Kylo.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t like him.”

He could see a small smile tug at her mouth. “Me thinks you doth protest too much,” she remarked.

He fully turned to look at her, “Shakespeare… I didn’t think anyone still read the classics…”

She shrugged, “I told you, I read a lot…” She swiveled in her chair to face him, “You like  _ me _ … why?”

He took a deep breath, casting his gaze down to settle on the shiny red boots of his uniform. “I...uh...I couldn’t get you out of my mind after… you know, after what happened last year on The Supremacy.”

“You ordered my execution.”

“It wasn’t personal.”

She laughed, “Seemed very personal, Hux.”

He shrugged, “I was a different man then, Rose. What we… Ren and I… endured from Snoke…” He let his voice trail off for a moment then added, “And before that, there was the abuse from my father… Well, I know it's not an excuse but The First Order was my  _ everything _ and I would do anything to anyone who posed a threat to it…”

“And now?” she asked.

“Now? Now…” He walked over to her, leaning to rest against the desk she was at, looking down at her. “I don’t know. I feel like my entire life has been a lie. I’m good at what I do but it doesn’t make me happy. I’m not even sure I know what happiness feels like…”

“I know what you mean,” she replied, a sadness creeping into her voice. “A year ago I would have said happiness was seeing you and Ren pay for your crimes… but you...the both of you, I mean, are not who I thought you were… It’s all very confusing.”

Hux reached a tentative hand out to Rose, barely touching her face. When she didn’t pull away, he moved closer, cupping her cheeks with his palms. He leaned in towards her. Her breath suddenly quickened and he swore he could hear her heart beating fast. 

But it was actually his  _ own _ heart thumping in his ears, deafening him. 

“Rose…” he whispered, “Do you know how long I’ve dreamt of this?” He closed his eyes, bringing his lips to hers.

“Rey…” she murmured.

Hux’s eyes flew open, “I’m sorry, what?” 

Rose pointed at the monitors behind him, overly excited. She jumped out of her seat, rushing over to the small screens. “He found Rey!” There on the screen was Kylo Ren, exiting an interrogation room with Rey behind him.

“Oh… that’s… um… good news…” he said half-heartedly. He turned away from Rose and the screens, desperately trying to school his features into a mask of indifference. He felt her tap him on his shoulder. He swallowed then turned to face her.

Rose grabbed him by the front of his stormtrooper uniform, yanking him down to her to plant a kiss on his lips. He was stunned into submission for a few seconds, before relaxing and wrapping her in his embrace. She deepened the kiss, opening her mouth to him. His hand settled on her cheek then, as his tongue danced wildly with hers.

As quick as it happened, it was over just as fast. Rose pulled back, slapping her palms against the hardness of his uniform’s chest plate. “Just something to tide you over until I can figure everything out…” She stepped away from him, reseating herself at the computer terminal.

Hux stood there in shock, his fingers touching his lips as if he didn’t believe what just happened. He glanced at her but she was busy typing once again. He straightened, clearing his throat. He ran his hands through his hair and clasped his arms behind his back. He walked back over to the camera monitors, watching but not really seeing. He was just too aware of everything that was Rose Tico - the way her fingers glided over the keyboard, the smell of her soap on her skin, how warm she had felt beneath his lips.

_ Bloody hell, _ he thought. He finally understood what Kylo Ren  _ felt _ for the Scavenger.

Something caught his eye on the screen. He leaned in for a closer look. He glanced at Rose, a sinking feeling settling in the pit of his stomach. 

_ And just how dangerous this feeling could be _ ...

She tapped out a few commands before throwing him a smile. “It’s done. Radio Finn.”

Hux lifted his blaster, conflicted.

“Hux?” questioned Rose.

He turned a dial on the blaster then reached for his comm, “Finn, do you copy?”

It only took mere seconds for the familiar crackle of the comm. “Wow, Hux, you actually called me Finn…” the stormtrooper Commander replied. “Are we a go in six?” he asked.

Hux cringed inwardly, “Negative. Go now.”

Rose stood, “Wait! What?”

“Affirmative. See you on the other side,” Finn confirmed.

Hux returned the comm to his belt. 

Rose grabbed his arm, whipping him around to face her. “They’ll be slaughtered! What the hell are you thinking, Hux?!”

He took a step back from her, raised his blaster and fired. 

A look of pure shock colored Rose’s visage a split second before she crumbled to the ground.

Hux walked over to the table and grabbed his red helmet. He shoved it on before calmly walking over to the door.

******

Kylo easily lifted the Stormtrooper in the air, body slamming him to the hard, steel surface of the floor. He took his saber and ran the man through before bending and reaching for the man’s blaster that he dropped. He turned and offered it to Rey. She cautiously accepted it.

“It won’t last long,” he replied, “Rose is trying to shut down the compound’s main system, rendering these useless to the Sith Troopers. It’s our only edge in this battle.”

She looked down at the blaster and he could feel her uneasiness seeping into him. He faced her, “Rey, are you alright?”

She avoided meeting his gaze, “Y-yes…” No sooner had she said the word, Rey swooned, reaching to steady herself against the wall.

Kylo wrapped his arms around her and she leaned against him. “Don’t pass out on me now, Scavenger…”

“I-I don’t mean to… I’m just so tired…”

“You’ve been through hell, Rey. I promise you, once we get through this, you can rest.”

She nodded, straightening herself. But he was hesitant to let her go. “I-I’m okay…now…” she whispered.

He gave her a skeptical look.

“Truly, Kylo. Just being close to you… I feel my strength renewed…”

“It’s our Bond,” he replied. “It’s like…”

“Life itself…” she finished.

“Yes…exactly. How did you know?”

“A dream…I think…” she said puzzled, as she tried desperately to remember.

Suddenly there was a loud bang that sounded above them, shaking the whole compound. Kylo braced himself against the wall, tightening his hold on Rey.

“For fucks sake,” Kylo said, his frustration showing.

“What was that?” she questioned.

“ _ That _ was a well-thought out plan going to hell,” he replied.

As if on cue, the alarm sounded, blaring loudly. Rey covered her ears, the noise so intense her head felt like shattering into a thousand pieces.

Kylo grabbed hold of her hand, pulling her behind him as he started down the hall.

Another explosion, this one causing parts of the ceiling to crumble. 

Kylo thrust Rey into a hall corner, covering her with his large body. She clung to his sweater, burying her face against his chest. Strangely, she felt a sense of calm. If they were going to die, at least they’d do it together.

The building seemed to stop shaking momentarily. He pulled free of Rey to check their surroundings.

He turned back to her, “Rey, we are going to have to split up.”

“What?! No!” She shook her head violently.

He moved to caress her cheek, “Rey, I need to get you to safety and I need to free those prisoners. I cannot do both before the whole building collapses.”

She looked him in the eye, “I’m not leaving you… not again…”

“Fuck!” he cursed, running his hand through his hair. He grew quiet for a moment. He grabbed her hand, interlocking their fingers. He laid a quick kiss to the back of her hand before turning away to hurry them through the corridor, Kylo almost dragging Rey with him. They came to a sealed door at the end of the hall. 

Kylo shoved Rey behind him right before he used the Force to pull the door open. He pressed himself up against her as they were greeted by blaster shots. He ignited his saber and walked straight into the line of fire, deflecting the blasts easily enough. He sliced his way through the red Stormtroopers guarding the prison cells, rhythmically alternating between thrusts of his lightsaber and Force maneuvers.

Rey watched him in action, in awe of how easily he connected with his powers and used them in coalition with his strengths. Even on her best day, her skill set was no match for him.

Kylo threw a punch and the last Stormtrooper fell in a heap at his feet. He stood there, in the middle of the melee, catching his breath for a moment.

The sound of a blaster being fired filled the air. Kylo turned in the direction it came from, but his reaction time was slow by half a second. It was too late.

Or at least it would have been…

Kylo looked at the frozen blaster fire as it hovered a hair’s breadth away from his face. He turned towards Rey. Her hand was stretched out, trembling from the use of the Force. She was barely holding onto it, but she still had the most astonished look on her face that she was even capable of doing it.

Never taking his eyes off of her, Kylo swiped his hand, knocking the blaster fire away to hit the frozen Stormtrooper who had attempted to kill him. Rey was released from her hold and immediately fainted. Kylo caught her with ease, and he scooped her up into his arms as she faded into unconsciousness.

He carried her to the door but remembered something that gave him pause. He turned back to the cells. With a flick of his fingers, the locked doors opened. Slowly, the prisoners came out of their cells, many surprised to see the Supreme Leader of the First Order as their savior.

“If you want to live, follow me,” he ordered.

*****

Finn ducked behind a large rock formation, the blaster fire barely missing him. He counted to three then reached around and returned fire, hitting two Sith troopers square in the chest. He pulled his comm from his belt. “Rose, do you copy?” he tried. No response. “Hux, do  _ you _ copy?” He cursed beneath his breath. “Does  _ anyone _ copy?” he yelled into the radio, clearly exasperated.

He watched from his spot as several of his Stormtroopers tried desperately to push through the line of Sith Stormtroopers, but it was no use. They were getting their asses handed to them. It was obvious at this point that the plan had gone sideways. They were going to need a new strategy.

Two of his officers hurried over to him, dodging fire coming from all directions. “Sir, it’s clear their weapons are still very much active,” one said.

“Yeah, no shit,” Finn replied. Finn took a deep breath in an attempt to calm himself.  _ Serenity now _ , he told himself. Truth be told, while he never liked the plan to begin with, he was more concerned with if his friends were even alive. Rey and Rose and Poe… that’s who he cared about. If Hux and Kylo Ren didn’t make it, well… aren't they all just biding their time until they could take down the First Order anyway? Well, maybe not Rey, but Poe and Rose surely were of like mind. Still, Finn would very much like to survive tonight and make it back to The Finalizer with all his friends in tow.

He handed his comm to the Stormtrooper, “Keep trying to get ahold of them.”

Inhaling deeply, Finn released the long breath, then came around the rock, blasting his way through the enemy line. One of his men beside him took a hit to his leg. Finn kept firing, ducking low as he ran to the injured soldier. He grabbed ahold of the man’s chest plate, dragging him to cover behind another large boulder. He crouched down, ripping part of his shirt to keep pressure on the man’s wound. He silently sent a prayer out into the universe for anyone who would listen, hoping for a quick resolution to all this. Preferably one that didn’t end with him in the clutches of the Empire.

Suddenly the night grew eerily quiet. The sounds of blaster fire ceased so immediately and all at once, Finn actually thought Rose had succeeded and powered down the main system. But the compound’s lights were still glaringly bright and a distant alarm permeated the otherwise silent night. Slowly, he peeked around the rock he was using as cover. The Sith Stormtroopers were still spread throughout the grounds, blasters drawn and at the ready. But now a General stood just outside the compound’s entrance, his hands clasped behind his back, an obvious superiority about him.

“I’d like to speak with your Commander,” General Pryde called out. “Negotiate a possible truce…”

Finn looked down at his bleeding comrade. He grabbed his hand and placed it on his own wound, “Keep applying pressure.” He checked his blaster, took a breath, then slowly stood up and came from behind the rock. He raised his gun and pointed it at Pryde.

The General just smiled, “Come now, no need for that. We are all friends here.”

Finn snorted, “Not sure what kind of company you keep, but friends don’t try and kill each other.”

Pryde’s smile only widened, “Sure they do. Wars were built on friends and family betraying one another. As a member of The First Order, you should be well-versed in such tactics.”

Finn swallowed, his grip on his blaster tightening. He didn’t like where this was going.

Pryde gave his surroundings a quick, cursory glance around. “Hmmm…speaking of The First Order, your Supreme Leader is nowhere to be found.” His gaze fell back on Finn, “Seems strange he would leave such an  _ important _ mission such as this in the hands of a  _ Stormtrooper _ …FN-2187, isn’t it?”

Finn cringed inwardly. He really didn’t like this Empire General. “So you know my name. Only fair I know yours.”

The General’s hand moved to rub his chin as he pondered this. “Very well… I am General Pryde, at your service.”

“Well, General Pryde, I’d really appreciate it if your men would lower their weapons… seeing as how we are all friends and everything…”

“You first.” He was calling Finn’s bluff.

“Not going to happen, General.”

Pryde shrugged, “Can’t blame a man for trying.” He looked at his Sith Stormtroopers, gesturing his hand in a downward motion. The Troopers lowered their weapons. Pryde returned his gaze to Finn, “Well, I gave you something, now it’s your turn to do the same. This is how negotiations work…”

Finn realized Pryde was trying to school him. He thought he was smarter and for now, Finn would let him think he had the upper hand. Slowly, he lowered his weapon.

“See? That wasn’t so hard…” Pryde replied. “Now, let’s talk about your surrender to the Empire…”

“And what makes you think me and my men would ever surrender to you…”

“Because I have something you want.” He paused, looking Finn dead in the eye, “And unlike you, I’m not afraid to  _ kill it _ to get what  _ I _ want.” Pryde nodded his head, and a Stormtrooper came out of the compound dragging a small form in his wake. He dropped the person at Pryde’s feet.

Finn looked on in horror at the crumpled body of Rose. She stirred on the ground. Finn automatically raised his blaster, pointing it directly at Pryde’s head. “Let her go!” he bellowed.

“Tsk. Tsk. The first rule of negotiations is to remain calm. Otherwise your enemy will know your weakness.” He swiftly kicked Rose in her abdomen. She yelped and sputtered, her eyes now opening. “The Supreme Leader should have taught you as much…”

Rose blinked and pushed herself to her knees. “Finn?” she questioned, as the fog cleared in her mind. She immediately surveyed her surroundings as she began to realize what was happening. She returned her look to Finn, “Whatever he wants, don’t give it to him!” Suddenly, she was backhanded across the face by Pryde.

“Shut your mouth, scum,” he ordered.

Finn felt his insides twist. But then something else caught his eye. The Sith Trooper closest to Pryde flinched.  _ Hux _ …

Pryde pulled his weapon from his side and pointed it at Rose’s head. “Surrender now or she dies!”

Finn’s finger tightened on the trigger of his blaster as he contemplated the General’s words. He looked at the figure of Hux standing there next to Pryde and then he looked at Rose. “I’m sorry, I’m afraid I can’t do that.”

Pryde’s control of his emotions wavered as his face contorted into anger, “Very well then.” He turned his attention to Rose.

Just then there was a loud whirring of sound. The compound’s lights brightened to a blinding intensity and then one by one they faded out, slowly plunging them into darkness. The Sith Stormtrooper blasters began to power down, dying in their hands. Confusion erupted.

“What the hell is happening here?” Pryde demanded. He still had his gun pointed at Rose but his attention was elsewhere. The Stormtrooper closest to him turned and suddenly blasted him straight in the chest. Pryde stumbled and fell backwards. The whole compound went completely dark.

Sith Troopers started firing briefly into the darkness before their blasters failed. Emergency backup lighting flared on, casting dim shadows over the area. Finn yelled for his men to follow him and they rushed towards the compound.

Rose struggled to free herself from her bindings when she was grabbed by a Sith Trooper. She instinctively started to fight back.

“It’s me… it’s me…” Hux replied. He removed his helmet. Rose took one look at him and then kicked him swiftly in the leg. Hux tumbled to the ground.

“You shot me!” she yelled.

“I know! I’m sorry. But I did it to save you!” Hux held his knee, writhing in pain. “Fuck, Rose, that hurt!”

“So did  _ you _ shooting  _ me _ !” She ripped at the ropes around her wrists with her teeth, all the while shoving away any of Hux’s attempts to help her.

He suddenly grabbed Rose by her shoulders and gave her a little shake, “I saw General Pryde on the monitors. He’s the Empire’s torturer… the things I’ve seen… the stories I’ve heard when I was younger… I couldn’t let that happen to you. I had to make it look like you were my captive!”

Rose stopped fighting him, “Really?”

“I swear it on my life. I even turned the power down on my weapon so you wouldn’t be unconscious for long,” Hux pleaded.

Rose held out her hands, “Untie me.”

Hux smiled, reaching for her wrists. He quickly released her. Rose smiled up at him for a moment but suddenly it faded. “Your blaster… it was set to stun?”

“Yes, why?” Hux questioned but then it dawned on him.

Both Rose and Hux turned simultaneously towards where Pryde had fallen. The General now stood there with his gun pointed at Rose. He fired once. Hux shoved Rose to the ground as he stepped between her and Pryde. The shot struck Hux in the neck, spraying blood across Rose’s face as he fell into the dirt.

Rose sat there in shock, covered in Hux’s blood. It was as if the world slowed down at that moment. She crawled towards him, pressing her hand to his neck, pleading with him to just hold on. She was only dimly aware of Pryde as he approached them.

“The son of Commandant Brendol Hux  _ giving _ his life for slave scum… how pathetic…”

“You’re the pathetic one!” Rose cried. “Don’t you know the Empire is dead?!”

Pryde snorted his disdain, “Foolish girl.” He grabbed her by her throat and dragged her to stand before him, choking her. “The Empire is eternal!” He raised his gun to Rose’s head then. She closed her eyes, tears streaming down her face.

But the shot never came. A strange gurgle erupted from Pryde. Rose opened her eyes.

The red fiery blade of a lightsaber had pierced through Pryde’s chest at that moment. Pryde released his hold on Rose’s throat and she fell to the ground. She looked up to see Kylo Ren appear from the darkness, just over Pryde’s shoulder.

Kylo looked the General in the eye, “Heard you were looking for me…” He twisted his saber in the man’s chest before yanking it from him. Pryde hit the ground. Kylo stood over him then and Rose joined his side.

“Long live The First Order,” she said, spitting on Pryde’s body as he looked up at them with dying eyes. Kylo kneeled beside the fallen General, pulling at something latched to the man’s belt. It was Rey’s lightsaber.

Kylo stood and turned towards Rose. He placed his hand on Rose’s shoulder, “Are you alright, Rose? Are you hurt?”

“Hux!” she yelled, swiftly turning to run back to the injured man. 

Kylo followed, kneeling beside his General, inspecting his wound. He placed Hux’s hand over it, “Apply pressure to it.” He turned to Rose, “That doesn’t look good but if we get him back to our ship, I think he’ll live.” He looked down at Hux, “Not easy being a hero, General… but you did good.” Hux rolled his eyes.

Kylo stood, grabbing two passing Stormtroopers, giving them orders to carry Hux back to the Falcon.

“Go with them, Rose. We are getting the hell off this planet.”

“Rey?” she asked.

“Already on the ship,” he replied

Rose didn’t broker any further argument, taking Hux’s hand as the two soldiers lifted him onto a makeshift stretcher.

Kylo looked over the carnage of the compound. Aki-Aki had joined Finn’s Stormtroopers and were corralling the Sith Troopers, disarming them. He caught the eye of the Aki-Aki leader. The old alien nodded his head which Kylo returned in kind.

Finn came to Kylo’s side. “Looks like Rose’s plan worked.”

Kylo chose not to respond to his particular statement, instead giving him further orders, “The Aki-Aki have agreed to let us help with the capture of the Empire’s soldiers. Leave a group of your men here under the express instructions they are not to interfere with the Aki-Aki… only assist when needed. We’ll send a transport for them in a fortnight. The rest of you need to return to your transport and rendezvous with The Finalizer. We have injured to tend to.” Kylo turned on his heel then, intent on walking away when Finn grabbed his arm. Kylo’s gaze fell to where the man had dared to touch him.

“What about Rey?” Finn asked, his grip unwavering.

Kylo met Finn’s gaze, “Remove your hand, FN-2187.” Finn swallowed, releasing his hold. Kylo stared at him for a moment before replying, “Rey is injured. I have taken her back to the Falcon.”

“And Poe?” Finn inquired.

“I’m h-here…” came the weak response from behind the two men. Both turned to see the pilot limping towards them. Poe was badly beaten, his face bruised… his lip, nose and eye bloodied.

“Oh look, the pilot lived…” Kylo responded. He crossed his arms over his chest but didn’t deign to even look in Poe’s direction.

Finn ignored Kylo Ren, grabbing Poe in an embrace, relieved to see his friend. “So glad to see you, man.” He hugged Poe harder, making the man wince in pain.

“Forgive me for breaking up your little reunion, but there are more pressing matters to attend to. Poe, take my TIE back to The Finalizer. I will fly The Falcon with the injured on board.”

“S-sure th-thing, boss…” Poe stammered.

Kylo just grunted his response, turned and walked away. He completely missed the look Poe gave him…a mixture of worry and anger.

*****

Kylo eased The Falcon into the docking bay of The Finalizer. He had radioed ahead, alerting his crew to be prepared for the injured. The hangar was busy, teeming with medical officers and Engineers. Kylo sighed heavily, running his palm down his face. This mission had been a disaster. And he was going to have much explaining to do with The Supreme Council.

As soon as the ship came to a stop, Kylo hurried from the pilot’s seat. He scooped up the still unconscious Rey into his arms, disembarking into the frantic fray of First Order and Resistance personnel. He caught the eye of the first officer he could remember the name of, one of Hux’s assistants. “Lieutenant Cass, report,” he barked, weaving his way through the crowded area.

The girl began to follow him, “No sign of any Empire Star Destroyers, sir. We are monitoring the situation.”

He stopped and turned to look at the young girl. Her eyes immediately went to the unconscious form of Rey cradled in his arms. He snapped his fingers and she tore her gaze away from Rey, meeting his, “General Hux has been gravely injured. See to it he is taken care of first.”

“Y-yes, sir. Right away, sir.”

Kylo turned away from her then, intent on carrying Rey to the infirmary. “Oh, Supreme Leader, there has been a development!” the officer called after him.

He turned to face her, “If it isn’t related to the Empire or the mission on Pasaana, it can wait.”

“B-but sir….” she stammered.

“It. Can. Wait.”

“Ben,” came the familiar voice behind him. Kylo froze. He looked at the officer, his face menacingly stern now.

She swallowed, “Supreme Leader, your mother is awake…sir.” She whirled around, and hurried away, clearly afraid of being on the receiving end of Kylo Ren’s rage.

Kylo took a slow breath, schooling his features behind a cold mask he was used to wearing. He turned around to face Leia Organa, all too aware he was holding her protégé in his arms. “Mother, you’re awake.”

But Leia’s attention went directly to Rey as she closed the distance. She brought her hand to her face, “What happened?”

Kylo took a step back from Leia, “She was injured but I’m certain she will be okay.” He stepped around her, coming to a stretcher in which he laid Rey down. Then he whirled to face Leia, standing between her and Rey. “Why are you here? The guards were instructed to keep you under lock and key once you awoke.”

“I’m the mother of the Supreme Leader, Ben… they’re scared of me almost as much as they’re scared of you.”

He cringed, “Please stop calling me that. That is no longer my name.”

Leia sighed, “Supreme Leader Ren, then. I want to help. Let me help.”

Kylo crossed his arms over his chest, pondering her words. He looked at Leia, “For now. And then you will be taken to your quarters. I cannot risk anymore Palpatine related incidents.”

“Alright, Kylo,” she agreed. He stepped out of her way and she came to Rey’s side. She caressed her forehead and Rey stirred awake.

“Kylo…” Rey murmured. Her eyes fluttered open and as they adjusted, she saw Leia. Panic arose in her and she sat straight up.

“It’s alright, Rey,” Leia replied.

Rey’s eyes searched the scene frantically but once her gaze fell on the imposing form of Kylo, her heartbeat slowed to a normal rhythm and she gave him a soft smile.

“You’re okay…” she said to him. 

He gave her a tight-lipped smile but when his mother looked over at him, it quickly faded. “Yes, everyone is okay. More or less.”

“More or less?” she questioned.

“Ummm… Hux took a bullet for Rose…Finn is fine… oh, and Dameron was beat to hell but he’s alive.”

“Dameron?” Rey scrunched up her face trying to place the name, then understanding dawned on her, “Poe…”

Kylo snorted his disdain, folding his arms over his chest.

“Poe…” Rey repeated, struggling now to pull herself to her feet.

“Yes… we know. You can stop saying his name now,” Kylo huffed.

Rey leapt off the stretcher. “Poe…..NO!” she hollered. She shoved Leia out of the way and thrust herself into Kylo’s arms. As she suspected, he caught her with ease. She grabbed his shoulders, pulled on every bit of energy she had in the Force and tossed the Supreme Leader to the side. Poe slammed into her, jamming the syringe meant for Kylo into Rey’s chest. Rey stumbled back and fell hard to the floor.

There were screams and shouts as chaos ensued. Kylo scrambled across the floor to Rey’s side, yanking the syringe from Rey to see remnants of a strange blue liquid. Rey touched his face and he met her gaze, “I’m s-sorry… I c-couldn’t let someone else hurt you...” She slowly slipped into unconsciousness.

Kylo stared at the syringe in his hand then at Rey’s lifeless body. A deep burning began in his chest as he felt his bond with Rey rip away, taking every last bit of his light with it. Gently, he eased Rey off his lap and onto the ground. He laid the syringe down next to her and slowly stood up. He turned and looked at Poe.

Poe met his gaze and knew immediately he was a dead man. But he turned to try and escape in vain. Kylo grabbed him by his jacket, flinging him across the room. Poe smacked into a bunch of stretchers and rolled to the ground. He was just pulling himself to his feet when Kylo reached him. He threw a punch at Kylo, who easily moved out of the way. Then he landed one of his own, pounding his fist into Poe’s abdomen before using his other to uppercut him in the face. Poe fell to the ground. Kylo didn’t hesitate. He kneeled over Poe’s broken body, steadily pummeling his face with hit after hit, feeling the man’s bones crush under his fists.

Everyone stood by and watched as the Supreme Leader of The First Order beat the best pilot in the Resistance to death with his bare hands. No one dared move or breath in case they were next to incur his wrath.

Kylo couldn’t stop himself if he wanted to. A dark energy he hadn’t felt in over a year was back in control now as he continued to beat Poe over and over. Rage had won this battle. He gave himself over to it now.

_ “Ben _ …”

A small voice edged into his mind.

_ “Ben _ …”

He tried to suppress it but it was insistent.

“ _ Stop, Ben _ …”

And then he felt it…a soft touch on his face… hands cupping his tear stained cheeks, turning him away from the bloody body of Poe Dameron.

Kylo squinted as the beautiful visage of Leia Organa drew close to him. “ _ Stop, Ben… It’s okay. You can rest now, son _ .” Her lips didn’t move but he could hear her voice soothing him in his mind. He released a shaky breath. His hand came to cover hers on his face. He pulled her touch away from him then stood, stepping back.

Everyone’s eyes were on him, most filled with the sheer horror of what they just witnessed. He looked down at his gloved hands now. They were covered in blood. He clenched them into fists, squeezing so the blood dripped to stain his boots. He stepped forward and the crowd parted. He took another step and another until he came back to Rey. No one dared to get in his way.

He knelt beside her, scooping her into his arms, rising to his feet with her cradled against him. She was still breathing, but their Bond had been shattered… the ties that bound their souls severed right along with her connection to The Force…

...dead...

...dead and gone like the last bit of good inside him…

...the end of Ben Solo...

The Jedi Killer left the hangar, carrying the Scavenger of Jakku.

*****

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thankfully, Hux's wound missed all major arteries and gives him the perfect excuse to grow that handsome beard of his!  
Poe is still alive too... for now.  
Hope you are enjoying it. Please leave comments, if you want. I love hearing from everyone.  
All this angst is turning into fluff by the next chapter. We are almost there for these stubborn virgins.


	12. The Villain of This Story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The fallout of the mission on Pasaana.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this has taken time to update. Quarantine life has been stressful but I’m finally getting those creative juices flowing again.

_ 2 weeks later: _

Kylo Ren stared down at the hangar from behind the glass of the War Room, his arms clasped behind his back, his mask firmly in place. He watched as the Engineers busied themselves preparing the fleet’s ships, only half listening to the Supreme Council as they argued behind him. 

Something deep inside him faltered when his gaze fell on The Millennium Falcon. He closed his eyes for the space of a heartbeat, beating it back down with practiced precision before returning his focus back to his officers.

Colonel Forsythe slammed his bulbous fist down on the table, giving it a good shake. “You and Ren had no right to authorize such a mission without approval from this Council!”

Hux scoffed, his hand immediately going to his neck to cover the bandage there as he cleared his throat, “On the contrary, Colonel, Supreme Leader Ren has _every_ _right_ to act in the best interest of The First Order, with or without _your_ approval.”

“The best interest of The First Order?!” the Colonel bellowed, his bulldog face turning a deep shade of red. “Traipsing off after his Jedi girlfriend is hardly in anyone's best interest….eck…eck….” 

The Colonel suddenly grabbed at his throat, his airway seemingly cut off. His face started to turn a deep shade of purple now as he struggled to breathe.

Kylo slowly turned around to face the Supreme Council, his hand raising as he clenched his fingers tight. “Forgive me, Colonel, I didn’t  _ quite _ catch that last part. You were saying?”

Colonel Forsythe clawed at his neck before he suddenly stood, knocking his chair over in the process. The other Council members scooted back from the table, afraid if he touched them, they too would fall victim to the Supreme Leader’s wrath. He coughed and sputtered for a moment until he was thrust high against the room’s ceiling, pinned there.

Kylo flicked his hand, sending the Colonel slamming down onto the table before he was whipped to the side of the room, crashing into a series of monitors then rolling to the ground in a crumpled heap.

Kylo slowly lowered his hand, briefly glancing at each member of his Council directly in the eye for a moment, reveling in how they all quickly averted their gazes from him… with the exception of Hux, who merely returned his look with one of condemnation. 

Kylo turned briefly to the side of the room where secondary officers stood, most of them quickly casting their eyes to their boots so as not to be pinpointed by the Supreme Leader. All save for one young man, preoccupied instead with looking at the now deceased body of Colonel Forsythe, a mixture of awe and curiosity on his face.

Kylo pointed at him, “You…. What is your name?”

“Me, sir?” he squeaked. “H-Harrington, sir. Petty Officer Harrington. I’m Lieutenant Coffey’s second…s-sir. ”

“Petty Officer? I think you mean  _ Colonel _ Harrington. You’ve just been promoted.” Kylo gestured to the now vacated seat of the last Colonel.

Harrington’s mouth dropped open in surprise, “Sir?” He gave Lieutenant Coffey a panicked look. She quickly looked down at her hands.

Kylo’s hand clenched into a fist at his side, “Do I need to repeat myself?”

“N-no, sir…” Harrington scrambled into the chair, cautiously pulling himself towards the table, the wheels scrapping loud against the steel floor in the deadly quiet room.

Kylo placed both of his palms on the table top and leaned forward, “Anyone else have an opinion with what happened on Pasaana?”

There was a series of sputtered “nos” and some coughs accompanied by throat clearings but not one person ventured to speak against the Supreme Leader.

“Well, now that’s settled, shall we….”

“I have some thoughts about Pasaana...sir…” Harrington interrupted Kylo, raising his hand to get his attention.

Kylo’s head snapped in the young man’s direction as Hux sighed deeply. As if on cue, the other Council members scooted away from the new Officer.

“Oh, do tell, Colonel Harrington,” Kylo bit out. 

Oblivious to his Supreme Leader’s precarious mood swings, Harrington leaned forward, “Well, I was discussing this with Lieutenant Coffey right before the meeting and...why are you shaking your head no?” 

Kylo turned towards the thin blonde, catching her violently shaking her head at Harrington, signaling him to shut up. Kylo straightened to his full height, his large arms crossing over his wide chest. “Lieutenant Coffey…” he addressed the young woman, “...something you wish to add?”

Coffey’s eyes grew wide as she looked up at Ren, “No, Supreme Leader.” She swallowed, casting her vision to her clasped hands in her lap. There was no mistaking the tremble in her fingers.

Kylo turned back to Harrington, “You were saying?”

Harrington stared at Coffey for a few seconds before looking over at Ren. He pulled haphazardly at his collar, realizing for the first time that the Supreme Leader was only humoring him. “Well…” he swallowed. He suddenly reached for the glass of water before him, taking a long swig of the cool liquid before clearing his throat.

Kylo’s fingers twitched, “Anytime now, Harrington.”

He cleared his throat again. “So… I was reading the witness accounts of what happened on Pasaana...did you read any of those?” Harrington paused. When Kylo didn’t move, Harrington continued, “Of course you didn’t. You were there, after all.”

“Is there a point to this rambling?” Hux complained.

Harrington looked at the General but then returned his gaze to Ren. “Supreme Leader, based on those accounts… you’re a  _ hero _ .”

The other Officers groaned. Kylo didn’t move, but there was no mistaking his right hand clenching into a fist.

“Wait… wait… hear me out,” Harrington stammered. “Look, I grew up on Coruscant, raised on the old legends of the Jedi and the Force…”

“Alright,” interrupted Hux, “I think that’s enough…”

Kylo held up his hand, silencing Hux. “Go on…” he replied.

“Force users… lightsabers… the Jedi and Sith.. these were all just myths...old wives tales and such...That is, until Supreme Leader of the First Order Kylo Ren showed up on Pasaana and made it all very,  _ very _ real.” 

Harrington paused for dramatic effect before continuing, “The way I hear it,  _ sir _ , seeing you in action...it was fucking beautiful…”

The room fell silent. The other members of the Council shifted uneasily in their chairs. Hux just snorted his disdain.

Kylo stared at the eager young man, studying him rather intently. “What is it you are suggesting?” he carefully asked.

Harrington stood, choosing to pace around the table, making damn sure he had everyone’s full attention before he next spoke. He gestured around at the other Council members, “I think we are all in agreement that you, Supreme Leader,  _ are _ The First Order.” 

He leaned forward, placing his hands on the table, facing Kylo Ren. “What happened on Pasaana was  _ legendary _ …” He paused again, clenching his fist, “I propose we create more positive opinion by liberating other planets from Empire rule…”

“We provoke the Empire, you mean,” Hux scoffed.

Harrington ignored him, all his focus on Kylo. “More missions like the one on Pasaana… led by the  _ great Kylo Ren _ .” He took a breath, gazing out beyond the room, his hands painting the picture as he recited, “ _ With the blood of a princess and a scoundrel in his veins, his defiance will shake the stars _ …”

“All right, enough, Harrington,” Kylo replied. He gestured for the young man to retake his seat. Harrington did so immediately.

Kylo gave his words some thought. “More missions?”

“Yes, sir. Our Intelligence says there are a handful of planets in the Outer Rim which have fallen victim to the Empire. Kef Bir… Kijimi… Jakku…” 

Kylo looked at Hux, “Is this true?”

Hux shrugged, “There have been rumors.”

“Not just rumors,” Harrington reiterated. “These planets need our assistance. They need  _ you… _ sir.”

“The First Order is not in the market of playing at heroics!” Hux replied.

Harrington cocked an eyebrow at the General. “You’re absolutely right. But we won’t be playing the hero. We will be strategically luring these planets into regaining their faith in the organization. Save one and three more will follow. They won’t hesitate to fall in line once we’ve extinguished the Empire. And we do that by uniting the galaxy against them.”

“Thoughts from the Council?” Kylo questioned.

Hux opened his mouth but Kylo held up a finger, silencing him, “Not you, General.”

Coffey cleared her throat, “We-we are striving to separate ourselves from the old Empire...sir… Perhaps this is the way…”

“Become the anti-heroes, so to speak,” Commander Wainwright chimed in.

“Show the galaxy the new face of The First Order…” Coffey replied.

“Gain their trust…” agreed General Bane.

“Their  _ loyalty… _ ” Harrington voiced.

“Squash the Empire  _ together… _ ” responded First Officer Noland.

“And then have one galaxy under one rule…” said General Rios.

“By the end of it, they’ll be clamoring for you to lead them…” Lieutenant Adia confirmed.

“Emperor Ren does have a nice ring to it,” Harrington finished. “I mean, how many people can actually  _ do _ what you can do... _ sir… _ ”

Kylo caught the gaze of Hux and held it for the space of several heartbeats. It was the General who turned away first. 

Kylo cocked his head to the side, “I will... _ consider _ your proposal…”

Harrington smiled jovially, “Thank you, sir….thank you…”

“If that is all…” Kylo waited, watching as the other Council members all looked away from him. “You’re dismissed.”

The Supreme Council scrambled from their chairs, each hurriedly leaving the room, almost fighting to be the first one out. 

Once they had all left, Hux calmly rose from his seat and walked to the door. He heard Kylo’s mask disengage and he glanced over his shoulder to see Ren slump into a chair, his hand covering his face as he rubbed his temples with his thumb and forefinger.

Hux turned back to the exit, reaching out to hit the palm pad, slamming the sliding door closed. He whirled to face Ren.

“I see you followed my recommendation and looked into Colonel Forsythe,” Hux replied.

“Yes. Your assumption was correct. He was sending communications to General Pryde.”

Hux sneered, “A traitor…” He looked over at Ren, “Did you have to dispose of him so dramatically?”

Kylo shrugged, “It got my point across to the other Council members. If they were thinking about betraying us, they aren’t now.”

Hux stood there, studying Kylo, waiting for him to look over and acknowledge him.

“Whatever else you have to say, Hux, can it not wait?” Kylo finally mumbled.

“I rather think not,” Hux replied.

Kylo heaved a heavy sigh, running his hand through his hair. He abruptly stood, resuming his familiar stance at the large window overlooking the hangar, hands clasped firmly behind him.

“Out with it, then,” Kylo sighed.

Hux faced the Supreme Leader, intently watching the man. “You cannot seriously be considering that child’s suggestion.”

Kylo glanced at Hux, cocking an eyebrow, “Was it not you who suggested practically the same thing on Pasaana? To cover the rescue mission?”

“Yes, well… that was different,” Hux replied forcefully. “I was merely trying to survive without us causing a war.”

Kylo smirked. “And here I thought you’d be pleased.” He glanced at Hux over his shoulder, “More missions means a greater likelihood I won’t return.”

Hux leaned back against the table, his arms crossing in front of him, “Well, there is that…” Hux absently touched the bandage at the base of his neck, a distinct reminder of how easy it is to not survive a mission.

Kylo turned to look at him, “How are you healing?”

“Slowly but efficiently.”

Kylo gestured at Hux’s beard, “And this? A new look?”

Hux caressed his chin and side of his face, “To cover the scar.”

Kylo simply nodded, returning to stare out into the hangar.

Hux ran his hand through his hair. “All right, I’ll say it if you won’t. What about the Holocrons… the quest for the dagger? Are we abandoning all that in favor of Junior’s propaganda campaigns?”

Kylo snorted. “Without a Jedi, there is no dagger…”

“Ren, correct me if I’m wrong, but you spent the better part of  _ ten _ years training as a Jedi…”

“I am no Jedi,” Kylo replied, his voice deadly quiet.

Silence enveloped the two men then, neither of them willing to further broach the subject. 

_ Fuck _ , Hux thought to himself.

“Ren…” Hux started but stopped.

“Hux?”

Hux swallowed, then picked up his data pad. “There’s a few things that require your attention. I assume you haven’t even looked at the things I’ve sent you.”

“I’ve been rather busy,” Kylo replied.

“Yes, well…” Hux scanned through his pad. “Ah, there is the matter of the Knights of Ren.”

Kylo flinched but said nothing.

“They have requested to return to The Finalizer…”

“Denied. Next.”

Hux stared at Kylo for a moment. “Ren, they will question your reasoning…”

“They will remain on Mustafar. Their requests have been denied. Next.”

Hux flipped through a few more pages before landing on something. He cleared his throat, “Your mother…”

“Next,” Kylo stated, interrupting Hux.

“Ren, you cannot simply ignore her.” He swallowed, “Well, I have seen to her accommodations and she has agreed to having StormTroopers posted outside her room but…” Hux stopped.

“But what?” Kylo asked, still refusing to turn and look at Hux.

“She would like to see you…”

“Denied. Anything else?”

“She’s also requested periodic, albeit escorted turns about The Finalizer…”

Kylo didn’t reply, standing still and stoic.

“She says it’s to stretch her legs but I think she just wants to see what her son has created…”

“When I want your opinion, I will ask for it,” Kylo replied sternly. 

Hux heaved a dramatic sigh, staring daggers at Ren’s back.

“Her request is granted,” Kylo quietly said. “If that is all, I would like for you to leave now.”

“Well, there is something else…” Hux replied, rather solemnly. He laid the data pad down on the table and clasped his hands together in his lap. “The Aki-Aki have agreed to turn over the Empire’s doctor.”

This got Kylo’s attention. “How soon?”

“He’s keeping the good pilot company in the Brig, as we speak.”

Kylo nodded. “Understood.” 

Kylo suddenly turned away from the window, walking to the table to grab his helmet before making his way to the door.

“Rey’s out of the infirmary.”

Kylo stumbled, freezing in mid-step. “Why are you telling me this?” he questioned through clenched teeth.

Hux swallowed, “I thought you would want to know.”

Kylo didn’t turn to face him but his grip on his helmet noticeably tightened. “That’s what you get for thinking,” he bit out.

Hux didn’t flinch, simply waited for the information to ruminate.

Kylo tensed, his palm running down his face. “Has she asked for me?” he whispered.

“No.” Hux saw no reason to lie. He continued, “We all lost something out there on Pasaana, Ren. Rey more than anyone…”

Kylo’s lips turned up in a tortured grin. “I didn’t lose  _ something _ , Hux. If anything, I was given a stark reminder of who I truly am.” He looked down at the cracked and scarred mask in his hand, “The face of The First Order…”

“Ren,” Hux sighed.

Kylo ignored him, choosing instead to shove his mask on as he turned towards the door. He paused just short of the threshold. “Confine the Scavenger to her quarters,” he replied coldly, “That is an order.” Then he quickly exited the room.

“Fuck,” Hux whispered, running his hands through his longer hair. He stood, pulling down on his coat to straighten it. He grabbed his data pad with a heavy sigh and made his way to the door.

He cautiously stepped out into the hall, grateful it was well-deserted. Ever since Pasaana, they had all been the subject of stares and whispers. It didn’t bother Hux so much. He easily killed the rumors with one glare but Rose…

_ Rose _ …

He smiled in spite of himself.

_ Sweet, lovely Rose _ …

She hadn’t left his side the entire time he was in the infirmary. Truth be told, he may have stayed just a little bit longer than medically necessary to keep her there with him. She suspected, to be sure, but never spoke against it. 

And, lo, how she spoke so often...filling his days and nights with stories of her life...her sister… her time with the Resistance. He readily absorbed it all, just thankful for the time they shared together even if he barely got a word in edgewise. It was the one time in Hux’s life where he actually cherished being the quiet one.

But now…

Hux had been out of the infirmary for two whole days and he hadn’t seen hide nor hair of the cute little mechanic. Almost like since he had been “healed” her obligation to him was complete.

“Fuck,” Hux muttered to himself, his strides down the corridor now purposeful.

_ Just go and see her _ , he chided himself.  _ Ask her to choose… _

Him…

Or FN-2187.

Hux sneered.

“Fuck...fuck...fuck...FUCK!” Hux exclaimed, taking a corner rather sharply, his mind obviously elsewhere.

He stopped abruptly in his tracks.

There she stood, at the end of the passageway, her finger in Finn’s face, chewing him out in low, harsh whispers.

As if on cue, they both stopped and turned to see him. 

Hux froze. He cleared his throat, his hand absently straying to the healing wound.

Rose followed the movement with her eyes, then took a step back from Finn. 

“Rose…” Finn pleaded, reaching for her hand.

Rose sidestepped him, choosing to walk away… straight towards Hux.

His heart clamored in his chest as she came towards him, his mouth suddenly running dry. His gloved hand ran through his hair, smoothing it out.

Rose nodded at him as she passed, “Hux.” She kept walking.

Hux’s heart sank into the pit of his stomach. His eyes followed her as she continued down the hall, never once glancing back at him or Finn.

Finn met Hux’s gaze, his contempt written all over his face before he turned and continued in the opposite direction.

Hux was left standing there… suddenly more alone than he had ever felt in his life. 

*****

Doctor William Larabee paced the length of his small cell, continuously wringing his hands as he mumbled to himself.

A loud clang sounded, causing the man to nearly jump out of his skin. On shaky legs he made his way to the bars, glancing up and down the darkened corridor. He gulped, mumbling reassurances to himself when nothing seemed to be there.

He slowly backed away, going to sit on the wooden bench in the corner of his cell. He dragged his legs to his chest, wrapping his arms around them and hugging himself tight. He had never cared much for the dark.

Suddenly, the shadows in the opposite end of his cell seemed to move and contort. Larabee pressed his face into the forearms.

“It isn’t real…” he chanted to himself. After several minutes, he peeked out. The shadows were now still. He breathed a sigh of relief, lifting his head completely.

“Doctor Larabee…” crooned a mechanical voice from his left.

Larabee flew out of his seat, fleeing to the opposite end of his cell.

Kylo Ren stepped out of the darkness. 

Larabee fell to his knees at the sight of the tall, dark warrior. “Please…” he cried.

Kylo tilted his head, the red cracks in his mask glowing like fire in the shadowy chambers. “Do you know who I am?”

“Supreme Leader Kylo Ren…” he stammered.

“Good. And do you know what I am capable of?”

The doctor started to laugh maniacally. “I have a greater understanding of your powers than you ever will!” he spit out venomously.

Kylo flicked his hand, the Force suddenly dragging the doctor to his feet, suspending him in the air. Larabee’s feet scrambled to find purchase, but his toes barely scraped against the metal of the floor. He clawed desperately at the air, trying to free himself from the invisible fingers slowly crushing his windpipe.

Kylo circled the cell with predatory grace before coming to stand before the suspended man. Even being held up by the Force, the small doctor didn’t meet Kylo’s towering height. 

He reached out, his fingers twisting in the air as he pried open Larabee’s mind and pulled at his jumbled thoughts. Kylo wasn’t gentle… delighting inwardly as he wrenched a shrill scream from the man that echoed throughout the tunnels of the vast prison.

He then abruptly released Larabee with nary a thought, letting his small body crumble to the steel floor with a loud thud. He stared down at him, his own mind sorting through all he pulled from the man’s fragile brain.

“You want to kill me…” Kylo mused.

“You took everything from me!” Larabee spat, recoiling his lithe frame into a tight ball.

Kylo crouched down, cocked his head to the side and studied the seemingly frail doctor. “Yes… I did,” he stated matter-of-factly. “Your children’s screams split the air as the New Republic was rendered to ash in a matter of seconds.” He leaned towards the broken man, “ I can hear them, you know? ...The cries of all those I have killed…” He lifted his hand, twisting it just a little, watching as the doctor grabbed his ears and started to scream, the voices suddenly filling his own mind.

“Stop! Stop! I beg of you…” Larabee pleaded.

Kylo flicked his wrist and the cries grew louder, more desperate. Then, abruptly, he dropped his hand and stood, ending the man’s torture. He turned away from the doctor.

Larabee panted as the pain in his head slowly subsided. He scrambled to his feet and stood staring at the back of the Supreme Leader. “You are wasting your energy. No matter how much you torture me, there is no cure for what I did to the girl!”

Kylo took a deep breath and slowly turned to face the brave man. “Cure?” he questioned, a hint of amusement in his mechanical voice. And then he gave a menacing chuckle. “I have no need for a cure.”

Two strides brought him close to the doctor, causing the man to shrink back in fear as he loomed over him. “I want you to create more.”

Larabee’s eyes grew wide, his mouth falling open in shock. “You’re just as mad as Pryde.”

“Hardly. I just know what to do with an opportunity when I see one.”

*****

Kylo strode through the dark passageway of the underbelly of The Finalizer with renewed purpose. The good doctor took a bit of goading but eventually he saw the importance of the Supreme Leader’s desire for more of the suppression serum. Ren simply had to appeal to his inner scientist eager to improve upon his noble creation. 

Kylo slowed a bit as he caught sight of the drying blood on his gloved hand. The Med Bay would make quick work of healing the man’s shattered arm and broken kneecap. Within a month’s time, Ren was sure the doctor would have a new batch ready… giving him plenty of time for the next phase of his plan.

He smiled behind the comfort of his mask, momentarily feeling a bit lighter that he was one step closer to his goal. He regained his pace, weaving through the bowels of the prison, carefully keeping to the shadows so as not to disturb his captives.

The sudden sound of a slow clap made him stumble in his step, giving him pause. He had only to reach out with the soft touch of his mind to know who was waiting for him there across the hall. He contemplated moving on but he never was one to back down from a challenge. He inhaled deeply before coming to stand before the darkened jail cell.

Poe leaned forward, visibly cringing from the effort, “All hail the conquering hero…”

Kylo tilted his head to the side, studying the beaten man with an amused curiosity, “Comfortable?”

“Not really…” Poe replied. His gaze narrowed, “Why don’t you lose the mask, face me like a man?”

Poe was baiting him. “Been there, done that… and you have the bruises to prove it.”

He shrugged, “Bruises heal. I still breathe to torment you another day.”

Kylo’s hand clenched in a fist at his side, “For now.”

Poe chuckled, “Doesn’t matter…”

“ _ What _ . Doesn’t. Matter.” Kylo bit out, even as he inwardly chastised himself for walking into Poe’s trap.

Poe shrugged, “Whether I live or die.”

“Is that so?” Kylo took a step towards the cell, “Care to test that theory?”

Poe bit his bottom lip, a sultry smile spreading across his swollen lips, “Mmmmm…”

The sound he made caused Kylo to cringe inwardly.

“You see, either way,” he continued, “I’ll  _ always _ be in  _ her _ head.”

Kylo took another step towards the cell, his finger pointing at Poe, “Do not  _ dare _ to speak of her in my presence.”

Poe’s smile grew wider as he pushed himself to his feet, albeit a bit unsteady. “Hurts, doesn’t it? Knowing that every time she looks at you, she’ll think of my betrayal… of what I was willing to risk to free her from your hold.” Poe licked his lips, still bloody and bruised, as he gave Kylo the once over. “Every time you  _ touch _ her, she’ll question, ‘ _ Was it all worth it _ ’….”

“ _ Was _ it worth it?” Kylo fired back. “Stealing her powers… wrenching away a part of her soul, all so you could prove a point?”

“Her soul?!” Poe chortled. “Come now, Ren. There is so much more to Rey than her ability to channel the Force.” He stepped closer, “I broke your little spell on her…” He opened his arms wide, “Now, she’ll never be yours…not really… So, yes, I’d say it was definitely worth it.”

Out of pure instinct, Kylo thrust his hand towards the pilot, drawing on his powers of the Force. It would be so easy… to snap his neck with just a turn of his wrist.

Poe lifted his chin in defiance, “Go on. Do it.”

Kylo clenched his jaw and tightened his fingers. Then, he took a deep breath and lowered his fist to his side. “Too easy. You’re nothing more than an injured, dying Rancor. There’s no  _ sport _ in killing you like this.” 

He drew close to the cell, holding Poe’s heated gaze, “When next we meet, we will both be free of our chains and we will battle like men.”

“To the death…” Poe replied.

“Count on it.” And with that, he spun on his heel and started to walk away.

Poe laughed mirthlessly, calling after him, “Who knew Ben Solo,  _ the Jedi Killer _ , had so much honor? Perhaps there is a bit of Princess Leia in you after all…”

Kylo froze mid-step. He looked down at his hand, concentrating on the pattern of the glove. With a swift and fierce tug on the Force, he heard Poe smack his face against the steel bars. He glanced over his shoulder at the crumpled man on the floor of his cell, holding his bleeding nose as he writhed in pain.

Kylo shrugged, “Guess there’s still a bit of my father in me, as well…”

He resumed his casual stride, his hands relaxing at his side. Good thing he was still wearing his mask for the smile that spread wide across his face would surely have everyone talking.

*****

Rey walked down the corridor of The Finalizer, resisting the urge to meet the curious gazes from First Order personnel and Resistance alike. She had only been released from Med Bay a short while ago after a grueling two week rehab and she knew she still looked like hell with a bruised cheek, scabbed lip and healing cuts on her wrists. Sitting alone in her quarters left little to be desired but she now realized she was woefully unprepared for the myriad of stares she was receiving. It was as if she was a monster... a broken, mangled thing deserving of their pity. And while she loathed to admit it, she was indeed broken... an empty shell of her former self.

For while her body would one day heal from the torture inflicted on it by the Empire, it was the scars deep within her very soul that would last a lifetime. You wouldn’t know just by looking at her, but inside, Rey was shredded to pieces and she knew she had no one to turn to… no one left who could begin to understand the pain…

_ He didn’t even visit me once in the infirmary _ …she thought warily. And she feared that now, with the desolation of their bond, Kylo Ren had finally freed himself of her and any growing feelings they may have once shared. It made her ache inside, her chest tearing apart as her heart clenched.

She felt a tear slip down her cheek and she quickly wiped it away.  _ This was a bad idea _ , she realized. She wasn’t ready for the scrutiny. 

She whirled around, wrapping her arms tightly around her as if they would protect her from the whispers. She would go back to her room... hide away until she felt normal again...

As if she would ever feel  _ normal  _ again....

But, alas, fate was indeed a cruel mistress…

She stopped dead in her tracks, her eyes falling on the large form of Kylo Ren as he strode forward. He wasn't wearing the mask, choosing instead to carry it by his side. But he was still every bit the Supreme Leader of The First Order without it, clothed entirely in black with his cape billowing behind him as his long strides carried him forth with purpose. People immediately busied themselves as he walked by, obviously afraid to make any sort of eye contact so as not to incur his wrath. 

But it wasn't as if he noticed. His gaze was trained down and he seemed lost in thought, his jaw set tight and firm, his pace steadfast.

He hadn’t seen her yet. She could run in the opposite direction or slip into a nearby room and he’d be none the wiser. Hell, the desire to do just that was strong but she found herself frozen to the steel floor instead, unable to take her eyes off of him.

And then he looked up and their eyes locked.

Recognition was immediate. He abruptly stopped, his grip on his mask noticeably tightening. He glanced behind him for only a moment and she realized he was contemplating turning around and walking the other way. But he quickly decided against it.

He met her gaze, taking three long strides to come stand before her. They both glanced around, intimately aware they were being watched by everyone.

He slightly bowed his head, “Rey.”

“Supreme Leader,” she replied.

He swallowed, his hand nervously taking his mask and tapping it against his thigh, “Hux informed me this morning you had been released…” His voice trailed off before he cleared his throat and added, “How are you feeling?”

She cringed at the question, her eyes darting away, afraid if she continued to stare at him, she may do something she’d regret, like tell the truth. “I’m better...” she lied. “You?”

She saw his fist clench at his side. “I’m  _ fine _ .” His tone had a trace of harshness to it.

“Good,” was all she managed to say.  _ Of course he was fine. Why wouldn’t he be fine? He was Supreme Leader of The First Order. He had The Force… and admirers… and wasn’t slowly dying inside at the loss of their Bond. _

She swallowed down her emotions and ran her sweaty palms down her thighs before chancing a glance up at him. He was staring at her intently. “Why are we suddenly so bad at this?” she asked in an attempt to lighten the mood.

“We were always bad at this...” was his no nonsense reply.

She tried to muster a smile. “True,” she agreed. Her gaze fell on the mask he held at his side. Before she knew what she was about, she tentatively reached out her hand, running a finger over the scratch in his mask... the one she gave him on Pasaana.

He instinctively drew back, bringing the mask closer to his body. She knew then she had messed up. He would think she was inadvertently reminding him of his mistakes when, in actuality, she only wanted to remember a time when they had been close. She clasped her hands together, nervously wringing them.

He cleared his throat, "Where are you headed?"

"Uh...back to my quarters, I think..." she stammered.

"Ah," he responded. 

They both stood there, neither one knowing what to say and both refusing to look at the other.

"I...uh...thought maybe you were going to see Leia. I hear she's anxious to see you."

She looked up at him in surprise, "You've spoken with your mother?"

“Not exactly…no. She has chosen confinement to her quarters. Hux brings me updates.” He was noticeably growing uncomfortable.

“Oh,” Rey replied, slightly defeated. “But you won’t mind if I see her?”

He snorted, his annoyance showing, “No, Rey, I haven’t  _ barred  _ her from having visitors.”

“I-I wasn’t implying…” her voice trailed off. She looked down at her hands. She hadn’t been prepared to see him, let alone to have this conversation. Everything was coming out so  _ wrong _ .

Kylo sighed heavily, “Listen, if you would like, I can escort you there now.”

Her blood ran hot at the thought of being alone with him. “I-I wouldn’t want to trouble you…” she shook her head, eager to just end the conversation and hurry back to her room.

“It’s no trouble…” he replied, his voice now lower, his eyes searching hers intently. She bit her lower lip and wondered if perhaps he wanted to say something more…  _ privately _ . But he suddenly looked away, clearing his throat again, saying in an unamused, even tone, “I could use the distraction.”

“Alright then…” Rey half-heartedly agreed.

He gestured her forward and easily shortened his strides to fall in beside her as they walked side by side.

“How have you been… truly?” he asked, his voice still low in an attempt to keep their conversation between them.

She shrugged, “I’m… _ adjusting _ …for lack of a better word.”

He simply nodded as if he understood her meaning. “And the nightmares?”

Her head snapped around to look at him. “I…uh…” she stammered.  _ How could he possibly know _ ? She hadn’t told anyone, not even the doctors, about the nightmares. She sighed, “They’re consistent but minimal…”

“Med Bay can give you something for a dreamless sleep,” came his cold response.

She shook her head, “I’d rather not…they help me to remember I’m still alive.”

He stumbled a bit at her words but quickly caught himself. “I see.” His comment came out through clenched teeth but yet was neutral and dispassionate.

She looked up at him. His jaw was tight, his teeth visibly grinding together. They came to an elevator and she noticed he pushed the call button perhaps a little bit too hard.

Uneasiness swept over her at the sudden realization they would be alone together… in an elevator… once again… She shifted from one foot to the other nervously while they waited.  _ Was it too late to bolt _ ?

The elevator dinged and the doors opened. He gestured her inside, moving his hand to her back without touching her. He stepped in behind her and pushed the desired floor before quickly moving to the rear of the elevator to lean against the wall. She peeked at him over her shoulder. He kept his gaze fixed straight ahead, his expressionless face carved from stone. 

A strange heat flooded Rey’s cheeks as she gave him the once over, his countenance and stance every bit the handsome, rugged anti-hero of the fables from her youth. He was such a large man… tall and broad… and she was instantly reminded she had once seen him completely naked.

She turned away, chewing on her bottom lip, desperately trying to think of some small talk to fill the silence… and quiet her lustful thoughts.

“What’s on your mind, Rey?” he asked, his tone clearly one of boredom.

“Oh!” He had startled her and she glanced at him for a moment. “Uh.. you…you said you could use the distraction…” She swallowed, “Has there been much fallout from Pasaana?”

Again that disdainful snort. “Nothing you need to worry over.”

He was being dismissive and Rey couldn’t help but feel hurt over it. “N-none of us could have predicted what happened… it-it wasn’t your fault…”

“Not.  _ My _ . Fault.” He tested each syllable as if he was pondering her words. “Yes, Rey, it most definitely was not… _ my _ …fault…” he snapped.

She turned to look at him, his menacing tone making her cringe inwardly. “I-I didn’t mean…”

“And for the record,” he interrupted, “I  _ did  _ predict what would happen. It is why I had forbidden you to accompany the pilot in the first place.” He straightened, arms crossing over his chest.

Something long buried began to stir inside Rey. Those broken feelings threatening to encompass her only moments ago fell away, replaced with unwarranted anger and perhaps a hint of resentment. “Forbidden me? I am not some wayward child for you to…to…to…”

He leaned towards her, using his full height as an intimidation tactic. “You can ‘ _ take care of yourself _ ’… yes, Rey, I remember.” He stepped back, turning away from her, his hands falling to his hips in frustration.

“Your sarcasm is not needed,” she bit out. “I will forever blame myself for what happened. Any attempt to further remind me is just you being  _ cruel _ .”

He whirled around, closing the distance in a heartbeat, sneering down at her, “Well that’s who I am…Kylo Ren…” He jabbed at her with his mask, punctuating each word as he continued “…the  _ cruel, cold, merciless _ Supreme Leader of the First Order.” 

She opened her mouth to retort but he was so damn close and the words just wouldn’t articulate. Her body chose then to betray her. His smell… so fresh and manly… enveloped her, causing her nipples to tighten into stiff peaks and a familiar dampness to pool between her thighs. She swallowed harshly.

Thankfully, he didn’t seem to notice. He took a step back and cast his vision down on the mask he held, continuing, “The  _ Jedi Killer _ …” 

He took a step closer to her, a heated fire in his gaze, “I warned Skywalker I would destroy it all... destroy you…and it seems my reputation has preceded me.”

“You…you didn’t do this to me… the Empire…General Pryde…They’re responsible…” she stammered.

He looked at her lips. As if on cue, her tongue darted out nervously to moisten them. He met her gaze with hooded eyes. “I allowed myself to become  _ distracted  _ and I let my guard down. I momentarily forgot who I was…” Suddenly his face changed, his mask of indifference sliding into place, his eyes devoid of emotion, “Thankfully that is no longer an issue.”

It was like he had struck her. Their bond… removed by a stroke of fate… all too clearly taking his feelings with it. She closed her eyes and turned away from him. She wanted it all just to be another nightmare. But the sharp pain cutting through her chest made it all too real. She wrapped her arms around herself and silently pleaded for this elevator ride from hell to end.

Silence enveloped them. While she preferred it to his cold and calculated demeanor, one question nagged incessantly at her.

“What will happen to him?” she asked quietly. 

“Who?” he questioned.

She turned to look at him. Again he was leaning against the rear of the elevator, his attention focused on his boots. He didn’t bother to meet her gaze. “You know of whom I am speaking of…”

“Dameron.” He huffed, folding his arms over his chest. “He is in the Brig.”

“I would like to see him.”

“Of course you would,” he bit out.

She chose to ignore his tone. “Will you deny me?”

He lifted his head and looked at her. For a moment, a torrent of unexplainable emotion swirled in his gaze but it was gone almost as quickly as it came.

It left her with an uneasy feeling and she looked away. “Will you kill him?”

“I almost did. But you already know that…” His voice was quiet.

“Wh-why didn’t you finish it?”

He scoffed, pushing away from the wall to stand at his full height, “And watch you martyr yourself on his grave? No…”

She looked up at him then, surprised by his words.

He moved towards her, his voice low and venomous, “The  _ only  _ reason that man still breathes is because I knew if I killed him I would have lost you forever.” He crossed his arms over his wide chest, “Turns out I lost either way…”

“K-Kylo… you haven’t lost me…” She took a step towards him but he dodged around her.

“Don’t.” He gave her his back. “I no longer require your pity, Scavenger. I know who I am.” He paused, breathing a heavy sigh, “You Resistance types are all the same. Everything I have done...everything I have risked...” He turned to look at her now, “The things I did on Pasaana to save you… I’m more a villain now than I ever was before... than the very man whose actions resulted in your torture!”

Her heart wrenched in her chest at his words. She needn’t her Force powers to know he had now resounded himself to being the villain in this story. She wanted to reach for him and wrap him in her embrace.  _ Thank him _ , her mind screamed. But the words failed her.

As if on cue, the elevator came to a stop and the doors slid open. He didn’t hesitate. He stepped through, turning only to hold it open for her. 

She came close and yet he didn’t move, just stared down at her. 

Finally he spoke, “Dameron’s fate is yours to decide, Rey, as long as it isn’t freedom. That I cannot oblige.”

He continued to stare at her, the tick in his jaw working steadily. “You’ll find Leia’s quarters are just down the hall, last on the left.” 

Still he did not move, taking his time to give her the once over before adding, “You may want to consider taking the sleep aid from the Med Bay. You look like hell. ”

And with that, he released the door and walked away.

*****

  
  
  



End file.
